From Hate to Love
by Frgtyou
Summary: The title says it all for Eli Goldsworthy, Clare Edwards begs to differ, it's hard enough findng love when you're known as the school's most unattractive girl all your life. Can Eli see the true beauty behind it all? Follow them in their childhood years.
1. You have ugly eyes

So this is my first fanfic, so criticize hard if you need to, I'll update in a week or so if you guys want me to continue…

*This is a story of Clare and Eli back when they were seven up to well the present, their childhood will be 2 chapters, their middle school year will be 3 or 2, and their high school and so on will be as far as the story takes us, THAT IS IF YOU WANT ME TO CONTINUE, if not its cool. I get it. ;(

Clare and Eli were born at different times of day, different days, and different seasons. Clare was born in the alluring spring, full of rebirths and budding hope. Eli, in the winter, cold and mysterious just like the weather. Both are different and at first are like fire and ice, but as time goes by they both share one thing in common that they least expected, well at least Eli.

YEAR: 2000

Clare's P.O.V

It's March, my birthday was a few days ago I just turned seven years old, Mom, Dad, and Darce all took me out to the park and we had cake with balloons, and some kids came, you see Alli is my only friend. Her name's Alliah to be exact, we are best friends back since kindergarten It all started when Alli farted in class once and everyone laughed at her, but I stood up for her and blamed it on the pig-faced girl that picked on her, not an ordinary friendship as you can see. But, we both had each other's back which made us the bestest friends of course since that day. You see I always have been picked on as far as I can remember, I was a chubby girl with poofy auburn hair, and huge glasses. Kids are cruel. They all called me "Ginger", "Four Eyes", or "UGLY!", I'M NOT GONNA LIE IT SUCKS. But, my mom said to me that its what inner beauty counts, but we all know that's mom-code for "Yeah, you're ugly, but I love and don't like to see you hurting like this." Darcy, my older sister was gorgeous, and was in middle school, all the boys loved Darce but Darce couldn't date since my parents did not let us until we are in high school. That doesn't mean Darce did not date she's 12 and has had three boyfriends, but we have a sister code that cannot be broken. Yet, what do I care, I don't even like boys _**yet**_. Anyways I was outside walking when I heard…

"Clare-uh!" Alli yelled

"What?"

"Come on! We need to go wait for the BUS!"

"We are not gonna be late"

" But…I need to go to school early so I could see Drew!"

Drew was Alli's crush since the first grade, but Drew was still afraid of girls and thought they had cooties, but Alli was a very beautiful girl, and like Darce told us, when we are twelve "she'll have boys all over her", however me… Darce never told me anything like that I guess it's because it was never going to happen.

After school I went home, I noticed there was some moving trucks next door, then I saw **him**. He had the brightest emerald-jade eyes I've ever seen, and the shiniest black hair tossed perfectly into place. I never felt this about anyone, could it be? Was this what Darcy and Alli called a "crush"? Well I don't get why they call it crushes, but I feel that because of what I'm feeling, they should call it "pops", 'cause my heart is going to pop out of my chest.

Eli's P.O.V

We we're moving today, 'cause my dad got a job as a radio DJ or something in the area, as I was looking around the neighborhood I noticed a pudgy girl with huge glasses and hair that looked like a fur ball, staring at me. Yuck! Cooties! Girls are disgusting and this one well she was…a four eyed ugly ginger. She annoyed me from the start, moving in here was going to be the worst. I can tell.

"HEY! YOU! What are you looking at four eyes! That ought to keep her away.

Ha, she ran away and turned every single type of red you could imagine, red orange, scarlet, strawberry, cherry, you name it, she showed it, and ran in her house like a little girl, you see that why girls are nasty, because they have icky, slimy, rotten cooties.

Clare's P.O.V.

Oh My GOSH! He saw me, he saw! I ran up stairs and couldn't help but smile, I don't care if he called me four eyes, heck! He could call me ginger and ugly as well, all I knew is that I was IN LOVE. This is the moment I decide, boy with the green eyes and silky black hair, you are going to be mine someday. _**Someday…**_


	2. I Won't Stop Loving You

Okay so thanks for the review guys…So sweet. J

Here's Chapter 2!

YEAR:2000

Month: May

**Clare's P.O.V**

It has been two months since Eli moved here and I am the happiest girl in the world. Eli, _**Elijah**_… the most lovable name a boy could ever have. I found out what his name was on his first day of school. This is because he is in my class, golly could I get any luckier! Eli is someone very special to me, I know this because every time I look at him I can't help but smile because everything about him is so alluring and genuine, that is why _**I love**_ the way his nose crinkles when he reads in class, I love the way he walks, talks, the way he smiles, and the way his laughter soothes my soul, Oh! and his eyes… His eyes are so sweet that if I could ever deeply look into them… it would probably never happen. This is because, you see, I was shy about this "crush" so I only managed to always glance at him at class a every chance I got, but only when nobody was looking, plus the fact that I never talked to him or had been approached by him in class any way whatsoever, because every time I was near him my legs became jelly, my heart thumped loud, and my weakness had occurred: I blushed…so So SO red. Although, one time I "dropped" *wink* my pencil and he picked it up! I never used it again. It is now in my "secret box", where it remains in the same condition he left it when he gave it back to me, the point is still dull, and the eraser is worn off (NO! This isn't creepy at all!).

Everyday after school, I go home and go up to Darce's room to see him through his bedroom window when he is at home, but I never cross the line such as when he changes clothes, since my mom and dad taught me that it's wrong to look at people dressing, basically to respect their privacy. The stalking or as I would like to call "admiration from a window away" only lasts for a little while, since Darce comes home from school and gets suspicious. Alli is the only one that knows I love Eli, but we pinky promised that I wouldn't say anything about Drew nor her about Eli. _However_, this is the point of my age when I realized that Alli has the biggest mouth ever, it was the worst day Degrassi's Elementary second grader has ever lived. It all started when:

_***Flashback***_

"Class, I'll be right outside speaking with Ms. Smith, behave for three minutes, if you do…no homework!" Ms. Crawford ordered

"Psss!" Alli yelled across the room

I replied to her with my hands signaling 'what'?

She then threw a note at me

_Clare, I'm so sorry :(_

"Why?" I whispered back

Little did we know Mark was eavesdropping on us…

"Because Clare loves Eli!" Mark (aka Fitz) exclaimed so loud that the whole class burst into laughter…and Eli looked angry, if not annoyed.

"Ewww! Gross!" Eli snarled making the least attractive face I had ever seen on him, which was impossible since Eli was so cute, but maybe it was my heart which found it disgusting.

The whole class laughed even more after, some kids rolled on the floor and hugged their stomachs. The room was echoed with chuckles, giggles, snickers, and laughs all which mad me sink deeper and deeper in my desk, I was a guppy in a sea of embarrassment. That's when tears strolled down my face and I felt so humiliated and hopeless, but not one moment was I ashamed of the fact because I was too proud of my love for _**Elijah Goldsworthy**_, I whimpered and sobbed and soon enough Ms. Crawford entered the room. Thank you dear lord, can I get a hallelujah!

"WHAT! Is going on here!" Ms. Crawford yelled

"Nothing except that four eyes loves Eli!" Fitz snarled

The class laughed more and Eli looked like he could care less.

"Mark Fitzgerald! Go sit at the corner of the room facing the wall!" Ms. Crawford exclaimed

She then looked over me and noticed I was hurting, she demonstrated enough sympathy that she told me that I was excused to go to the bathroom until I feel better, but to go with a classmate. That's when Alli stood up and said "I'll go!"

Alli in fact was the last person I wanted to see, I mean how could she, she was my best friend WHY! Oh WHY!

The walk was silent until Alli broke the ice

"Clare, I'm so, so super infinity plus one sorry!" Alli begged

"Why did you tell." I sniffled

"Fitz and me were talking about you, he was calling you ugly, but I said 'nuh-uh' and he was like 'uh-huh', and I was like 'nuh-uh' 'cause Clare and Eli are going to marry one day, Fitz then got the hint and found out, Clare **you know me**, it slipped!" Alli said in the most sincere voice I ever heard.

"It's okay, but that does not mean I'm going to give up, I '**like like' **Eli, Alli!"

"Well now that everyone knows, maybe you have a chance!" Alli gleamed with hope

"Doubt it." I whispered, I never would, but that won't stop me from trying, I can't give up before giving all I got.

We went back to class, when we entered, Fitz looked angry facing the wall, the class was still giggling, and Eli acted like it never happened, that's another thing I love about him, I can tell he's the type that would focus on the things that really matter, than fret over the smaller things.

**Eli's P.O.V.**

Moving here wasn't so bad, that one girl next door stopped bothering me, the first grade was alright I made many friends including Fitz, he was a funny and cool guy, except when he wasn't a doo-doo head. Like the time he yelled out in class that Clare liked me, Clare was her name, huh I never met a Clare, but I guess all Clares are ugly, since this one definitely was. For example, the name Cindy, it was my mom's name but everyone called her CeCe for short, and all the ladies and girls that have the name Cindy that I met are nice, but they all still have cooties.

Anyways, back to _that day_. Boy oh boy, did I hate that day! When I found out Clare liked me, let's just say I didn't care but I didn't like it. Well, then again she was not the first to come on to me like that, other girls came up and would kiss me on the cheek or play handball or soccer with me at recess, which means that they like you, but they still were all the same cootie-infected icky girls. Yet, Clare was what Fitz called the "Cootie Queen", since she was the ugliest girl in school. Fitz began liking girls since kindergarten supposedly, and has been having his eye on Mary Daniels, but she was kind of ugly too. You would think that after that day in first grade Clare would give up on me but it was the complete opposite, she annoyed me everyday, knocked at my house and tried to play with me once, she even brought her dolls to my house! DOLLS! But, every time I ignored her and each day I began to hate her more and more.

_**The Rest of The Years In Elementary School:**_

**Clare's P.O.V**

2nd Grade: I Love Eli!

3rd Grade: I Love Eli!

"Alli and Drew are boyfriend and girlfriend!" (for a day and a half of recess)

4th Grade: I Love Eli!

5th Grade: I Love Eli!

"I wonder what middle school Eli is going to?"

_Mrs. Clare Diane Goldsworthy on all my notebooks year after year._

**Eli's P.O.V.**

2nd Grade: I Hate Clare!

3rd Grade: I Hate Clare!

"OOH! Girls!"

4th Grade: I Hate Clare!

"Sandra Cassidy sure is perty!"

5th Grade: I Hate Clare!

"Degrassi Middle School here I come, watch out ladies!"

Okay so here's Chapter 2, Eli started liking girls and hasn't stopped. Clare still LOVES ELI!

What's coming next?

P.S. Sorry that this chapter is kind of short, but what do you prefer? Long chapters of Eclare romance in high school (coming soon!) or long chapters of Eli and Clare elementary school style with no action! ;(


	3. 6th Grade: Invisible and Popular

Please Review and tell me what you think! Thanks guys! :)

**I DO NOT OWN DEGRASSI**

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YEAR: 2005

6th Grade

**Clare's P.O.V:**

Elementary school passed by, I won the merit award of my school, for being the student with the highest grades, something every parent would be proud of and apparently so should I, the problem was that I had very little…well no friends except for Alli or extracurricular activities. Therefore, I spent all my days studying, reading, or getting ahead in class. I tried to make friends, but they all never gave me a chance, I am a really nice person, really and I know I am a darn good friend, its just that in elementary school, I'm sure you all remember, you probably were one of those kids too. There was always a kid that stuck out in class, either he or she smelled, looked funny, talked weird, or was 'different' . Well according to the kids of Degrassi Elementary school, I was all the above. Alli tried to introduce me to other kids, but like I said they never gave me a chance. It was _**him**_ that was my motivation and will to keep moving forward. I know this sounds cheesy, but he was the sunshine to all my cloudy days. I however, was the rain, hurricane, and storm on his sunny days. I still love Eli, but I got the hint over the years, ever since in the 4th grade, when some kids said he gave Sandra Cassidy his school lunch with three twinkies! THREE! I mean it may sound silly, but that's like giving a girl a diamond ring in elementary school. However, I would not give up on him, I would stop stalking him or going after him, because I now realize it was pretty creepy, but I was seven what should I have known? But that doesn't mean he lost the special place in my heart, no because I know he will there forever and ever. Darcy soon got the hint I liked him and told me that I should "change", which meant I needed to lose weight, and become more girly. I admit, I gained a couple of pounds over the years, but personally I didn't care, I mean I was not obese, but I was definitely fat, worst part is…I got braces. Yep you heard me, I used to be ugly, but now I am dare I say grotesque. I however, decide to deal with the fact and surpass it. I am not going to be a stupid bimbo who will go anorexic and be something I am not, what is my inspiration you may ask, well for smart kid like me you then analyze the greatest women in history and find that brains got them far despite their looks. Sure, I wasn't peachy of looking the way I was: Poofy-long, tangled hair, a pudgy body, braces, and huge glasses, the freckles cleared on the bright side. STILL, I know Eli would never o for a girl like me I mean he was perfect, he always was best looking in elementary school, bright emerald eyes, charcoal silky hair, and a smile that would kill others, did I mention he's on the town's soccer team, yep you heard me he was a jock, he had all the perfect assets a guy would crave to have, plus he was 'unique'. What I mean to say is that Eli wasn't like other guys, he always had a thing for black and death, though I found out that it was because "It is the real him", I adored the fact that he was not a poser and was simply who he was, which guys befriended and girls were head over heels for.

Sixth grade was somewhat better than elementary school, since it's bigger and I wasn't the only 'different' one, I befriended other kids like Wesley Betenkamp and Connor Deslauriers, we had study sessions at each other's houses and joined the academic decathlon team of our school, I was captain. Alli became popular and admired by many boys like Darcy assumed, she only hung out with me outside of school, like on the weekends and after school, but she never wanted to go out in public. I'm certainly not stupid and know what is going on, but if I was willing to undergo all this crap just to keep a friend, I was willing to do it. I was still picked on too, even worse than Elementary school. Fitz used to call me four eyes, but now calls me "Fatso", he was one of Eli's close friends too, which disappointed me. Drew was always the one laughing, K.C. was Fitz's partner in crime, and Adam would give me looks that said 'sorry, that these three are idiots', Eli, Eli never looked at me, which in the strangest way hurt the most than being called names.

Then Eli, well Eli did not hold off, girls came and left, but they were never official with him- that is he has kissed and gone to second base with girls, but never had a girlfriend, which could only mean one thing, Eli hasn't found _**"his girl" **_yet. He never acknowledged my presence, for example if I walked in a room with the wind blowing, Eli would notice the wind and find me invisible. Luckily, I have English, Math, and P.E with him, he was the definition of "perfect". He excelled in everything, he was good in Math, achieved beautifully in English, was a natural at history, and was a successful athlete. I however was good in all academic area, but I studied and was not naturally smart, and P.E., well there is a reason I'm fat, I do participate but I have trouble doing sit-ups, and mile-run with all the extra weight keeping me down. Eli is my first love, but sometimes I wish I would have fallen in love who was perfect for me. Rather than them being perfect compared to me.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V:**

School was amazing, and life could not get any better. I had it all: the girls, the grades, the friends, _and the looks_. Clare stopped bothering me, thank God! Although I have to say… how do I state this in a nice way… she got more "simple". I have got to admit, I matured a bit over the years. I look back and realize it was wrong to think the things I thought of her, but that doesn't mean I like her. She is someone I do not even notice. _Anyways_, as I was saying, school. It was great. I became very popular, our group consisted of a few guys and additions. There was me, Drew, Fitz, K.C. (he was from Lakeshore Elementary school), Adam (Drew's brother and my current best friend), Kevin, and Lucas (Lakeshore too). Adam and I were good friends, he had my back and I had his, the same music interests, and hobbies, he was goalie in the soccer team and I was offense. Drew was pretty cool, but a bit of a meathead, so no meaningful conversations with him, a football player too. Fitz and me were pretty close, probably the closest to me right after Adam, but he was a bit of an ass. He always picked on other kids, I never found this appealing and would just ignore his idiotic behavior, but he was always cool with me. K.C. was the least I got along with, a complete douche bag. He thought he was so good-looking and treated girls as objects, not my style even though I'm not prince charming. I frankly, don't even want him in the group, but Drew and Fitz get along with him. Kevin and Lucas were both alright, but were just added to the group since Kevin's dad was loaded, and Lucas's dad had a sweet 1973 mustang, which was meant for him as soon as he would receive his permit. So you see it was like an investment with those two, for high school and such. Now girls! They are the best thing that a boy could ever love. Ironic isn't it, this coming from the boy who thought all girls were cootie-infected creatures. My first kiss was Miranda Vandall. It was after school in the fifth grade, behind the tetherball court. If you ask me, she was a terrible kisser, after that we sat together in class, but we slowly drifted apart, much like my other experiences with other girls, there was Samantha, Natalie, and previously there was Teresa. They were just all not good enough to be my girlfriend, like my dad says I'll know when the moment comes which girl would be **"the one"**. This applied to everything, you know from a simple relationship to marriage. But, I'm not thinking about that stuff, I'm too young! What I'm saying is, I want my first girlfriend to be someone I don't get tired of seeing after two weeks, you know? Girls are like candies, some are sour, "sticky", sweet, nasty, tasty, dry, hot, or good. It's too bad though, since many girls generally come with a surprise center. Sure, some may be very attractive, yet their personalities lacked desperately. At this moment I have a thing going on with a girl I met at lunch, she was a beautiful girl, probably the prettiest at this school. She had dark brown eyes, with jet black hair, and a breath-taking smile. Her facial structure was nicely constructed. However, she was too skinny, too "flat", but that did not stop her from being a ravishing beauty. Her name? Julia, Julia Basinet. She was special. She had a nice personality, I was not the only one that noticed, since she was very popular. In fact we met through our friends. One thing led to another and currently we've just gone to the mall together, and second base. However, I still don't know if she's the "one". You know? I need some time, too bad I met her a month before summer began. Oh well, here we come 7th grade!

***End of Ch. 3***

**Author's Note:**

So, some of you say I should make Clare pretty in Middle School, but I'm going to wait further on, I mean I need to build some serious drama before any of that occurs. I'm going to do this story **my way**. I have a feeling you guys would like it though in the end. Just _**please, no suggestions**_. I know how this story is going to go, okay? But anyways, you guys totally are an awesome audience, thanks for the support! :)

Oh and I am making Adam a guy, if he's a FTM, then I'll have to focus a bit on that I mean I can't just say he's a transgender and move on, besides this story is Eli and Clare ONLY as the main plot. Anyways, Adam is hypothetically a dude. So don't get bothered.

P.S. I'M SO SORRY GUYS BUT I WON'T UPDATE FOR TWO WEEKS SINCE I HAVE TO PREPARE AND TAKE FINALS, I might update a chapter if I have time, but I have two AP classes I need to study for so yeah…


	4. 7th Grade: Over My Head Part 1

I feel guilty leaving you two weeks without nada…so this is a spare chapter I had ready, but it's long to keep you entertained meanwhile I study and pull all-nighters! Yay! NOT!

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Year: 2006

7th Grade **Part 1**

**Clare's P.O.V.**

It was November already in our seventh grade year, I managed to survive sixth grade, I was now in seventh, I still love Eli, I always will, and the day I realized it was the same day that I realized that I may have a chance with him. It came on a cloudy Saturday, the air was crisp, the sun was cloaked by the shadows of the clouds, it rained the day before and the grass was mounted with slick drops of dew, it will be a day I will never forget, and hopefully, neither will Eli.

It all started as I woke up, I walked across my lawn as I was mowing the lawn, Darcy had left to Kenya a month ago and the house was more silent, so I always found extra time to do spare chores or hobbies to keep me busy. Since Alli went to go hang out at Jenna Middleton's house almost every Saturday and ditched me. I was mowing the lawn and reading a book at the same time (lesson shall be learned) as Eli came walking home, back from his usual soccer practices. He was practicing on his front lawn, when he managed to kick the soccer ball over and hit me in the face.

"Oh, Man! Geez, I didn't see you there!" He exclaimed, _**go figure, Eli not noticing me.**_

"It's uh-um alright, I guess it's my fault, my-y uhh head up in the-the clou-u-ddds you know?" I stuttered, so badly, it was the first time Eli had talk to me since the fourth grade. I tucked my head, facing the ground. _Breathe Clare, Breathe_

"What do mean, it's your fault, your like in your own property?" He smirked, I could tell he found my embarrassment amusing. He then chuckled.

"Clare? Right" He then said with the most gentle voice ever, I looked up

"Ye-ahh." I stuttered again

"Oh, what'cha got there?" He pointed at the book tucked in my arm

"Ohh? This, It's uhh…." For a second I forgot how to speak. He then reached his hand and grabbed it.

"_The Tell Tale Heart? _By… Edgar Allan Poe, woah looks cool?" He analyzed the book with amusement "What's it about?"

"Umm… well you see it's about a young man who is taking care of the old man and eventually kills him due to his wandering vulture eye." I managed to say but in a low whisper

"Sounds cool, you've read it already?" He asked interested

"I read it six times, I love his books." I was finally feeling comfortable speaking to him. _This is a first._

"Really! That's interesting, say, do you mind if I borrow it, you kind of got me interested?" He said with a hint of plea in his voice. But of course I will, hell he can borrow The Pit and the Pendulum, Ligeia , and The Masque of The Red Death whenever he wants, _anything, just for him._

"Of, course!" I yelped, without noticing.

"Thanks, I'll uhh see you around Clare, I'll give this to you when I'm done, cool?" He smirked.

"Sure."

I knew Eli was smart, but I never thought he was interested in intellectual means on his spare time. To my surprise, he finished the book the next day, on Sunday, he gleamed with happiness and praised me on how fantastic it was, he then asked for more to borrow. I said yes of course. I was so happy to share something in common with him. Then on Monday, I realized he wasn't the person I wished dearly he was with me on Saturday.

He was with his group in the cafeteria at lunch, I approached and with confidence as I said,

"Hi, Eli!" I waved, he then exchanged a puzzled look.

"Sorry, do I know you?" He said with harshness in his voice, while Fitz, K.C., Julia, Kevin, Lucas, and Jenna snickered. To my surprise Alli was in that crowd, but looked away from me, and Adam glared at Eli. Adam, he seems like the most decent one out of all of them.

I rushed out of the cafeteria, slowly. I hid my head in embarrassment. I should have known. I was so stupid, then Connor and Wesley approached me at the quad.

"Hey Clare!" They smiled in unison.

"Hi." I muttered

"What's wrong?" Wesley asked

"I should have known…"

"Known what?" Connor said

"Elijah, Eli Goldsworthy." I pouted

"Why what happened?" Connor asked as Wesley nodded in concern.

I then explained the supposed "blooming" friendship I thought I had with Eli, and the Cafeteria incident.

"Well.. Clare you see, there's a social class in school, Eli is at the top, and we, we are way at the bottom, no not even! We're so low we don't hold a social ranking, only teachers in this school would know our names. It's just something you got to accept." Connor stated.

"Yeah, Cleo! Cheer up, now come on, we've got to go prep for tomorrow's Algebra test!" Wesley snapped, (Cleo was a nickname he had for me.)

"Sure." I muttered, it sucks having geniuses as friends, especially if they are boys, they totally lack emotional feelings.

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**Eli's P.O.V.**

On Saturday, I was walking home from soccer practice, then I hit my soccer ball to Clare, my neighbor she yelped in pain, I felt sorry immediately. I reached over and offered an apology, she stuttered as I talked, for some reason I found this both funny and cute, like a cute bunny. _Wait… What? _I talked to her as I noticed a dark book, I looked at it and it was cool-looking. I then asked her to borrow it, she said yes, I went home and read it. Man! This book was genius, so vivid and capturing! I was so grateful that she introduced me to this author! I begged for more, I even showed it to Adam he found it amusing as well, but not at the same level I did. He was more amused to find out I borrowed the book from Clare Edwards.

On Monday, Clare approached me, she then said hello, Ughh! I did not want to be mean and be harsh to her, I mean she was nice with me from the start, but the guys, would pick on her; even more and the girls would be vicious to her if they knew I talked to her. Really. I actually find people that think they are superior to others, really low and shallow. However I could imagine Fitz already picking on her and both Jenna and Julia bothering her, now that _**me and Julia are now an item. **_However, we kept it on the lowdown, I really hate gossip and figure our relationship will be stronger if I don't feel pressured from others. I felt bad how I treated Clare, strangely guilty. Adam, knew it was wrong for me to treat someone like that and immediately shot me a death glare, but I don't need to explain to him anything. I walked Julia home, and gave her a sweet goodbye kiss, Julia was the jealous type, she then asked.

"So, what did that one chubby girl want at lunch?" She asked straight forward

"Her? I don't even know her, she's just my neighbor, I guess she thought we were friends or something. Why? You jealous?" I smirked

"Of HER? You've got to be kidding me Elijah!" she snarled, God! I hated it so badly when she called me that.

"No…look it's getting late bye." I kissed her, don't get me wrong, Julia was a good girlfriend, she was an awesome kisser too, and I really cared about her, more than anyone, but there was something…something missing.

"See you." She kissed me one more time.

I walked home and noticed Clare on her balcony, reading a book, I then remembered today and felt bad with what had happened. I then threw a rock at her balcony, she looked down.

"Can you get down here for a sec?" I asked

She walked downstairs and out her door, she looked at me with sad eyes and a crooked smile. She looked at the ground.

"Listen, sorry about today. I shouldn't have treated you like that, it's just that if my friends find out I talk to you, well…listen they are just going to pick on you, and well my girlfriend, Julia is kind of jealous, so you see.." she then interrupted me

"Girlfriend?" she asked shocked and hurt

"Yeahh…well I'm sorry, I actually do think you're a really nice person, but if you want a friendship with me, it has to be a secret."

"Ummm.. Okay Eli, I see. I uhh have to go work on my homework." she said really quiet, yet kept her face on the ground, not looking at me at the eyes, her glasses then slipped.

"Oh, um here." I picked them up and she snatched the glasses from my hand.

"Thanks, I guess…I'll uh see you around.?" she asked, her face still on the ground.

"Guess, you will." I said and left

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**Clare's P.O.V**

He apologized to me and was the happiest in the world, then my world shattered as he muttered the words 'girlfriend' and 'Julia'. I couldn't help but cry after those words came out his mouth, it was like a bullet through my heart. My throat tightened, my stomach felt nauseated, and my heart stopped for a second. I cried, in front of him and faced the ground to not let him see me. I ran upstairs, hugged my pillow, looked at the window and saw rain pounding on the streets, and a thundering crescendo filling the area. My emotions were representations of the weather. Worst part is, I grew a friendship with Eli throughout the year, we shared books in common, the same movie interests and ideas on topics throughout the world. I introduced him to literature and he introduced me to loving him more and more. However, at school we went back to what we were, me invisible and him the social king. Alli was now part of his group, and ignored me from then on, she became Drew's girlfriend, and mocked me in the halls along with girls like Jenna and Julia. I despised Julia, not because she was Eli's girlfriend, seeing her and him rub, kiss, and caress one another was _**hell. **_But she was mean to me, always, she made my life hell in so many ways, she was even worse than Fitz. One day it was my birthday, and nobody noticed except for my parents, I walked to my locker and noticed two cards slipped in there, one was inside my book _"The Raven"_, I let Eli borrow that one a week ago, inside was a slip of paper that said

_Thanks for the book, it was very awesome_

_P.S. Happy Birthday, have a good one!_

_-E._

Then there was a card in a pink envelope, I opened it and saw it was from Alli, it read

_Happy Birthday! I'm Sorry I am a horrible friend, but you will always be the best one I ever _**had.**

_-Alli_

"**Had", **that means she no longer wants me as a friend, the best present I had ever received.

However, that same day my parents gave me a purity ring as my present, I was very religious, and vowed a promise to God, my parents, and my self. It was beautiful, the ring was engraved with the words: _**True Love Waits.**_ I walked in the bathroom and slipped it off to wash my hands, I did not want to get it rusty.

Then Julia and Jenna entered, along with Bianca DeSousa, a girl who desperately wanted to be a part of their group. Julia walked over where I was and looked at my ring.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" she snickered and the others laughed

"Please, give it back." I mumbled

She tossed it to Bianca, who tossed it to Jenna.

"True love waits? What is that supposed to mean?" Jenna asked stupidly, Julia then snatched it back.

"It's a purity ring, retard."

"Oh?" Jenna muttered and Bianca snickered

"I don't see the point of someone like _**you,**_ has this I mean it's pretty clear by you appearance, NO one would ever have sex with you!" She smiled, a smile that made me want to slap it off her face, but don't cry Clare, You have to show you are better than that.

"True, but it's my beliefs and I have to follow it whether you like it or not, which by the way is none of your business." I spat. _Woah? Where did that come from._

"Excuse me?" she yelled, Jenna and Bianca gave me a look, the look that said 'Ooh-you-shouldn't-have-said-that.

"You heard me, now leave me alone." I grabbed my ring out of her hand and walked out of the bathroom. Let's be serious, Julia is a short, very skinny girl, I however for once have the advantage of having extra weight, I could take her down easily.

As I walked out of the bathroom, I realized, I just blew off Julia. Julia Basinet! I have declared war, worst part is, war between the boy I love's girlfriend. I could see the beloved friendship I had with him go down the drain. CRAP!

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Please Review! :)

Oh! And P.S. For those of you who haven't noticed…this story is out of character, so if you are going to complain to me of how you don't like it, do me a favor and stop reading! In other words if you don't like it then GTFO! But not you other guys, you guy are totes awesome and cool! P.S. Who says Julia is going to die? You guys have no idea what I have in store for you! :) You'll just have to wait and see, and if you like it or not in the end that's your problem ;)


	5. 7th Grade: Look After You Part 2

I found time to finish this so yay! I'll update next Wednesday, that's a promise. Por favor! Review. It's cool if you don't I won't threaten you guys. Haha.

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**Eli's P.O.V**

It was March already, Clare's birthday was today. It amazes me that Clare and I were able to grow a decent friendship over time. Adam was the only one that knew I spoke with her, let alone shared interests with her as well. He understood my reasons for not letting others know the fact that she and I were friends. Although, I hate to admit, part of me was slightly embarrassed to be friends with her. Her basic profile at school was known to be a loser, an outcast, a loner, _an untouchable_. Nobody even knew she existed practically, I was one of those people before as well, and that is until I finally spoke with her. I don't know what it was that made her unappealing to people. _Her appearance…DUH! _I guess, I was one of those who judged her too quickly, before I actually got to know the real Clare. She was…I guess you can say: the most innocent, smartest, and nicest girl I had ever met. _Eli, WHAT ARE YOU SAYING! _What am I saying?

Anyways, she had let me borrow _"The Raven"_, last week, I had returned it, since I knew her locker combination, and left a Happy Birthday note inside, since we were, after all good friends, but kept in a secret. I walked out to lunch, as Julia approached me followed by Jenna and Bianca. Drew was with Alli on a bench making out, Fitz and Adam were sharing comics, and Lucas, Kevin, and K.C. were flirting with some random girls. Julia had a countenance in which her eyes were dark and infuriated, her nostrils were flaring, and her fists were gripped together tightly. Not a pretty sight…at all. I haven't seen her like this since a girl at the mall flirted with me. _OH MAN! What did I do now!_

"Whoa, what's on your grill now Jules?" Fitz asked

"Let's just say… we've got a pest to take care of. You know the drill, Fitzy." Bianca snapped

"Who was it, where, and how." Fitz asked

You see, our group was _invincible_ in our school. So if anyone messed with us, we messed with them. However, I only recall drastic actions being taken place if it was serious, not if it was just annoying any one of us. I was soon intrigued by this conversation.

"It's…Fatso!" Jenna exclaimed

_Fatso? Who the hell was fatso? _Then I remembered.

"You've got to be kidding me…Clare, Clare Edwards?" Fitz laughed between bits

"Shut the fuck up! Fitz!" Julia yelled. **She was pissed.**

"Okay…okay what happened?" Fitz asked

"She threatened me…ME!" Julia snapped

"How?" Fitz asked. By now, everyone was interested to know and focused their attention to the conversation.

"She…she threatened to fight and hurt me!" Julia stammered

Lies! Clare would never harm a fly! I know Julia like the palm of my hand, she started something with Clare first. _Wait? Why are you defending her?_

"Guess, we'll take care of it then, Jules." Fitz nodded and motioned his head towards Drew, Adam, K.C., Lucas, Kevin, and _I_.

I quickly motioned my head to Adam, and did him a face which said 'we-can't-let-this-happen', I knew all boys very well. And if they plan on hurting Clare, they will do more than succeed, they will _**destroy **_her.

"Good. Glad to know you guys have my back." Julia smiled.

I was going to get to the bottom of this.

I was walking Julia home after school, as usual when I started talking with her. Maybe I can convince her to drop this whole "hurting Clare" scheme.

"So, Jules about umm…that one girl, I forgot her name?" I tried to play it cool.

"Clare?" she raised her eyebrow

"Yeah, you know how I feel of Fitz and the other guys picking on people, you know it's not my style. So just drop it _**for me**_, I mean I like you so much better when you let go of these things." I asked nonchalantly

"Why!" Julia looked confused

"Listen, why waste your…_our _time on her when we could focus on better things." I smirked, that always made her melt.

"Like what?" Julia said curiously

"Like this…" I leaned in a kissed her with passion, my hands groped her body, and her fingers laced my hair, her kisses were always…_something_.

"I see…fine, but just for you, since I love you." Julia said

I didn't notice it, until a second later, because she said "love", for the first time. Love…I do not love Julia, I care for her a lot. Like her more than any girl I ever met, but love? I just could not say those words to her, but I could not hurt her feelings as well, so I muttered two words that I said to every person in my life, nothing special.

"Me too." I smiled, but I really wanted to frown.

"Oh… Elijah! You are so sweet!" Julia squealed. Fucking crap…I hated, no wait…I abhorred whenever she or anyone called me Elijah! This so annoyed me.

"You too. Bye." I kissed her, simple and sweet, so she wouldn't complain to me later on.

I walked home, and noticed that no one was at Clare's house. Typical. They probably took her to church or something. Clare loved church, she was the most devout Christian girl I ever met. I however was atheist, just my beliefs, you know. Anyways, so was her family, her sister had even left in the middle of high school to do missionary work in Kenya. Darcy. Hmmm…_Darcy, _I had a huge crush on her when I was eight. I happen to find it uncanny, how Darcy was beautiful and Clare was…well…Clare. I walked into my house, my dad was off to work already and was only home in the morning, when I was at school, my mom was…my mom, she was perky and supportive, but I'm not really the 'baby boy' type. I ate dinner, watched TV., did my homework, and took a shower, then at around eight at night, I heard people singing and laughing. I looked over my window and saw through Clare's living room window that her parents were singing her happy birthday, her mom then cut her cake, after, both her mother and father had gone to somewhere and left her alone. She looked sad, it must suck being alone on your birthday. Then, she stepped outside, I couldn't help but look, she was sitting at her porch…_**crying**_?

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**Clare's P.O.V.**

After the bathroom incident, I went to the rest of my classes, I went home and my parents took me to church, since my mother and father participated in the fundraisers. I loved church, it was the only place where I felt accepted, and I couldn't be ridiculed or judged. However, today, my birthday, I just wanted to go home and be with my family, but they focused on their priorities first and always. I bet if it was Darcy, they would have dropped all their plans and take her out to a fancy restaurant. But me…no! After I thought they were done. They took me home and bought me a cake, I was so happy and satisfied at the moment, but my parents went back to the fundraiser, and left me alone…on my birthday. Why me? Why, do I have to feel so alone and worthless. I am nobody, like Julia says, I am fat and ugly, like Fitz ridicules, and I am…

"Hey…are you okay?" Eli was next to me, my savior! I did not even notice it, but I was crying.

"Me? Yeah of course." I stated

"You're a terrible liar…what's wrong?" Eli asked concerned and sweet

"No, nothing I just, am really happy!" I smiled, I did not want to bring a sob story to him, and it would just be very pathetic of me.

"Then why are you crying?"

"Tears of joy!" I exclaimed

"Sure it doesn't have to do with your folks ditching you on your birthday?" Eli asked reassuringly, he knew me so well.

"That? No, I'm used to it."

"Okay, I just saw you crying, and well I was just curious."

"Thanks, and thanks again for the birthday wish!"

"Oh, that, it was nothing." he said emotionless, of course, I meant nothing to him.

"I bought, a new book, it's 'Fight Club' by Chuck Palahniuk…it's uh really good!"

"Cool. Thanks, you have such cool taste, you're the person I have most things in common with!" He gleamed happily

"Same here." I smiled. Only to have cake stuck in my braces. Crap!

"Uhhh…yeah, see you around." I could tell he got disgusted by the sight.

"Okay." I walked back into my home.

_**MEANWHILE…**_

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Julia's P.O.V.

After Eli told me he wanted that I should drop my revenge scheme. I agreed, but that doesn't mean I was going to keep my promise. If Eli finds out I go along with it, he will get mad at me…which of course cannot happen! I just had to include those that would be useful. Drew and Alli cannot be trusted, both have the biggest mouth ever. Adam as well, he was Eli's best friend, he would tell him. Kevin and Lucas were just plain useless. However, Fitz is good at getting back at others. K.C. was going to be a big part in my plan. Jenna and Bianca as well. Now, how to hurt Clare Edwards without it being obvious. I proposed my plan the nest day to the four, they agreed. Operation: 'Destroy Clare Edwards' was good to go. Fitz suggested we should wait until eight grade year, since the school year was almost over.

"How are we going to get her?" Jenna and Bianca asked

"Simple, please elaborate Fitzy." I said

"Sure, you see Clare is a complete loser. She will die to have any guy fall for her. That's where K.C. comes in the picture. K.C. 'the stud', will seduce Clare, and use her, make her think that she's the love of his life, and break her. Simple. Then…Jenna, will be used until the end, you will see. Bianca, you will have to make sure the story gets around of how Clare thought K.C. 'loved' her and got her heart broken. Her reputation will be completely diminished, compared to the little one she has now. No matter where she will run too…she will therefore, always be ridiculed." Fitz explained, heartless.

"Oh. That's Genius!" Jenna screamed

"What can I say, I'm a natural." Fitz smiled

"Yeah, yeah...just make sure Eli does not find out or I'm screwed. Got it?" Julia snarled at the others

"Of course." K.C. smiled

"Duh!" Jenna giggled

"Ditto." Bianca replied

"Now, let's make this bitch wish she was never born." Fitz stated

* * *

K.C., Bianca, Jenna, Fitz, and Julia now had their plan set.

Months passed by, it now became July, school was over. Time passed in the summer. Julia and Eli were going stronger than ever, much to Clare's dismay. At the same time, their friendship deepened as well. Clare told Eli everything, except her devoted love for him. El trusted Clare with some facts as well, surprisingly, Clare knew more about Eli, than Julia did. Darcy called Clare every week, Clare begged for advice and Darcy gave it like the good big sister she was. She even mentioned that Clare and her family should visit her some time. But Clare never wanted to leave Eli for a second. Eli was growing deeper feelings for Julia, however it was more an attraction which captured his heart. Julia finally 'developed', and like the boy Eli is, he 'loved it', but not her. Then September came, and school began into their eighth grade year. A year that would change everything.


	6. 8th Grade: Never Say Never Part 1

60 reviews? Thank you so much! This is my first fan fiction ever! I am so happy, you guys are the most awesometacular people ever! Can I get an ECLARE! Woot, Woot! JK Here's Ch. 6

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**Clare's P.O.V.**

School began. How I loathed being ridiculed and taunted. Walking through the halls and outdoor area being known as nothing was horrible enough. However, the worst part of school was seeing Julia and Eli kiss, touch, look at each other with awe, and hearing her purr his name. Dear Lord! How I wished I was in her shoes, having Eli jump at the snap of my finger, he was so in like with her and she was so in love with him, jealousy reached its peak within me each day. Nevertheless, I was grateful enough to have Eli as a friend. He was so much more than I expected, he was more than a popular, pretty face who was praised by girls and admired by boys. He was my soul mate. And seeing him each day, not being able to speak to him was a cruel torture in this miserable school. It's a good thing, this is the last year though. Wait? What am I saying? I have to still see these jerks each day in high school, and I will not be able to have Eli embrace me in public as his friend. It was like I was forced to see them every day, which my misery was continuous for me and others would contribute in.

The first week of school as an eighth grader was barely over and it was a Saturday night. I stepped outside to refresh myself. The weather was…**hot**. And was worse inside my house…_**damn**_; the air conditioner had to be broken at a time like this. To take my mind off the burning breeze, I pulled out a book. _"The Tell Tale Heart",_ this would be the tenth time I read it. I loved this book from the beginning, but I loved it even more to know that this is the book which brought me an amazing friendship with Eli, one that warmed my heart and soul, soothed my pains away, and glued a foolish grin on my face every time I thought about him. _Speak of the devil he was right next to me_

"What is this… the ninth time, you've read this?" Eli asked amused

"Tenth." I smiled

"Cool." He replied

I then burst into laughter.

"What's so funny, Edwards?" He asked intrigued.

"Just that…remember how you used to hate me. And now, you are my friend…" I laughed uncontrollably

He then joined me as well.

"First of all, I was seven, I didn't even know what hate was. Second, I just didn't expect _someone like you_…I mean **you** to have the same interests as me." The laughing had stopped at the end of his voice, and I felt disappointed.

"What do you mean _**someone like me**_?" I asked…strangely appalled.

"I just meant that…umm." He was left speechless.

"You mean…ugly, weird, and unpopular?" My voice cracked at those words

"No, I just meant that, well…look I did not mean to. I'm sorry. " he said

"No you're not." I was now utterly distressed

"Clare, I really am sorry. Who says you're any of those things. You are…the nicest, sweetest girl I had ever met. Please don't take it the wrong way." He said sincerely

"I'm sorry I overreacted, I just have been having **one of those days**. You know?" I replied, trying to get over his comment.

"That's the Clare I know, you see, if it were Julia, she would have flipped, and start drama." He replied, I hated the fact that he compared me to Julia.

"By the way, how are things with her…last time I checked, they were good." Eli always told me all of his personal issues, that's to show how close we had grown together.

"Fantastic!" He smiled

"Really?" I was now even more sad

"Yeah you see…Julia is so beautiful, she is also a really good kisser, and I like her more than any girl I've ever met. No one can compare to her." He replied enthused

"That's really good, glad to see that you are happy!" I replied

"Yeah thanks! It's uh getting late, and I have a soccer match tomorrow…early, so have a good night!" He was happy

"Oh! Of Course! Good luck on your match!" I replied

He then left. It hurt hearing from the guy I love and adore, that he is happy with another girl. However my heart was satisfied to know that he was happy. That's all what really mattered after all. I know what you're thinking: that I may be too young or too stupid to understand the concept of love, but you know what? I am not too dumb enough to feel it. I still have no idea what love is and I will for a very long time not be able to describe it, but all I know is that it hurts…**a lot**, and it makes me feel so blissful at the same time. I looked up at the stars and dearly thought, why? Why do we humans sometimes have to love someone, who loves someone else? Destiny is cruel. Out of all 6.8 billion people in the world, why did I have to love Eli? A boy that I could never have. _6.8 billion People , and Eli had to be __**the one**_.

School was back on Monday, and I was in English staring at the board, waiting for class to begin, when all of a sudden K.C. approached me. _K.C. Guthrie? What the heck does he want? _

"Hey Clare." he replied

"Hello K.C.?" I asked confused

"Can I speak with you after school?"

"Why?" I asked coldly

"Listen…it's really important." He smiled warmly

"Sure." I was surprised

_**What did he want?**_

**The Plan in Action**

That's when it all started. It simply was with an after school conversation, which shifted into him liking me? Me! At first he told me that he thought I was really smart and wanted some tutoring in English. I agreed. I went to his house each day, and we talked every day as well. Turns out he was a very sweet boy. One day in December, K.C. told me he liked me, it was on Eli's birthday ironically, he ditched to go to one of his close friend's birthday party at a restaurant, to visit me. _Eli did not invite me since all of his friends were going to be there. _I then fell for K.C.; he was after all pretty cute and nice. From then on, I decided that I would focus on forgetting Eli. Eli and I were never going to happen. K.C. on the other hand, as crazy as it sounds; I actually believe he did truly like me. He talked to me in front of Jenna, Julia, Bianca, ad Fitz. _Something Eli would never do_. This surprisingly, all of them started to become more respectful towards me after K.C. and I spoke. I never told Eli this situation, because I still loved him, and besides it was one of his friends, what would he think of me?

February came, and on Valentine's Day I found a rose in my locker, it was from K.C. The rose was the final step which decided for me that I should move on from Eli and go with K.C.

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**Eli's P.O.V.**

Clare and I were becoming really good friends. She knew everything about me as much as Adam did, he even met Clare once, turns out, and he thinks she's cool too. However, he understood why my friendship with Clare could not be public. As time went by, I noticed that Clare would be gone almost every afternoon, as well. But she just told me that she would be gone to go help at church. Sometimes, I even spotted her talking with K.C., something was up. Yet part of me was kind of scared to find out. I did not know why though?

Now back to other things like Julia. Julia was…beautiful. I liked her so, so much! The girl was smoking from head to toe. A deep attraction for her emerged out of me towards her; I guess my teenage hormones were getting the best of me. We deepened as a couple as well, our passionate kisses soon transformed into steamy make-out sessions. Then one day Julia proposed that she wants to have sex already. I on the other hand, want to wait until high school, I mean at thirteen…that's a bit too young. Besides, we are both inexperienced virgins. What would we do?

Months were forgotten and it then became May, school was almost over in June, and we would graduate. We would all move on to new lives at Degrassi Community High School, everyone was going as far as I knew except for Kevin and Lucas. Not really a loss you see, oh well. Our graduation day was coming soon as well, it was something that we all anticipated for, which would occur on June 15. The graduation dance was coming on June 8, before, something else we've all dreamt of since the sixth grade, this dance is said to be pretty fun, and I plan it to be that way. I was taking Julia as my date of course. Drew was taking Alli. Adam was taking some girl named Jessica. Lucas was taking some other girl named Melissa, Kevin was taking his friend Helen, Fitz was going with Bianca, and **K.C. was taking Jenna**.

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**Clare's P.O.V.**

The graduation dance was coming! I never got excited for these school events, but I had a date! K.C. had asked me to go with him; he said he had something very special in store for me. Personally I believe he was going to ask me to be his girlfriend. I couldn't help but feel happy, and relieved, I think I was finally getting over Eli… K.C. was so sweet, charming, handsome, _and he_ was not afraid to let others know he liked me. Jenna had even approached me once to tell me that K.C. wouldn't stop talking about me! I couldn't believe that a guy like him liked me! I was pretty skeptical at first but when he would look into my eyes and whisper beautiful things to me, I believed him.

The dance came and I got ready at home, K.C. told me to meet him at school since he had to go after school to his football practice. I then arrived at Degrassi Middle School, I was wearing a navy polka dot dress, with a ribbon on the waist, and puffed sleeves, since my arms were a bit too…chunky to be seen through. I tied my hair in a pony tail and straightened it. I walked up the steps and saw Eli at the entrance. He seemed like he was waiting for Julia or something, he smiled at me and I passed by. We couldn't speak on school grounds. _**He looked really handsome tonight, **_he was wearing black skinny jeans, a red vest and a black button sown dress shirt, and something about him had a special glow to him, I personally believe it was his eyes. I then walked and approached my destination and waited at the back hallway of the school for K.C.

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**THE PLAN IN ACTION (Nobody's P.O.V.)**

Clare waited for K.C. in an isolated hallway behind the school, as Eli waited for Julia at the front of the school. Little did Eli know that Julia was with the others setting up their plan. Today was the day where one door would close and another one would open for both **Eli and most importantly Clare**. Clare was too naïve and innocent to actually see what was going on, no matter how smart one would be, all should know that **love blinds all**.

K.C. approached Clare at the hallway, while Bianca was rallying all those inside the dance to motion out into the soon to be fulfilled hallway. Fitz stood at the back waiting to watch his cruel joke in action. While Jenna waited until it would be her cue. And Julia you may wonder? Well, she was working on keeping Eli distracted. Her good looks were the dagger to Eli's Achilles' heel. Then the torture began.

"Hey beautiful." K.C lied

"Hey. You look really handsome." Clare giggled. _Naive Clare_…

"I just want to ask if well…" K.C. stalled

"If what?" Clare grinned

"So…kiss me." K.C. grinned

Clare stood there thinking, _do I really want to kiss him?_

"Wait, I don't want to take this too fast." Clare whispered

"Clare, prove to me that you like me as much as I do." K.C. asked seductively

Clare was decide, but nevertheless leaned in for her FIRST kiss as K.C. soon stopped in the middle and shoved her towards the floor, too bad poor Clare did not realize that the whole school was in the hallways laughing when this had occurred, Bianca succeeded in her part. The word got out. Everyone was a witness.

"What…what was that for?" Clare asked surprised and hurt, she then picked herself up.

"What do you mean? You are ugly! You can't come on to me like that when I have a girlfriend! Jesus Christ! I am not interested in you!" K.C. snarled

"Bbbut…you! Asked me! To kiss you! You said you didn't have a girlfriend too." Clare was both confused and hurt. _What was going on?_

"I never would! Not even if you are the last girl on earth! Of course I have a girlfriend you psycho! Her name is Jenna Middleton, way better than you in countless of ways! Just because I said hi to you once does not mean I love you! You…you crazy bitch!" K.C. screamed heartless

The crowd gave attention to this scene. Clare looked like a crazy desperate loser trying to destroy a relationship. K.C. seemed like the victim. All were laughing at Clare, it was like first grade all over again, except this time no one would forget in a day or so, and this was twenty times worse in all possible ways. _This had destroyed her in a matter of minutes. _Only two had sympathy for Clare in the crowd. Adam Torres and Alli Bhandari. Both knew she was hurting and both wanted to get in, give her a hug, and get her out of there as soon as possible. Where was Eli you may ask? The clueless boy was in the back of the school, distracted by his cold hearted girlfriend. _If only Eli was here_.

"K.C…you said you liked me and thought I was beautiful and…" Clare was interrupted

"You…? _K.C. laughed _Beautiful? Never! Jenna is beautiful!" K.C. snapped, and before you know it Jenna popped out of the crowd and planted a sloppy, passionate kiss on K.C., this was the final step which _**destroyed the heart and miniscule reputation of Clare Edwards.**_

Clare ran out of the school, Alli followed her home. Fitz sat back with his arms crossed on his chest as if he had accomplished a masterpiece. Bianca laughed uncontrollably. K.C. was satisfied, along with Jenna. Julia had a gut feeling that everything went according to plan. Adam knew this was all wrong. Eli was fine, until something in the back of his mind was worried and angry. _But why?_

Clare reached her house and dragged herself up the stairs. _Thank goodness her parents were not home_. She then threw herself on her bed and cried uncontrollably, she couldn't breathe, her heart felt numb, her lips quivered with such agony, and she lied there staring at her pillow. One thing ran through her mind. _Misery. _Then warm arms smothered her torso and teardrops planted on her back.

"Oh Clare…" Alli moaned. Her best friend was here with her at her toughest moment and she couldn't help but feel **saved**.

Clare couldn't speak. Her sobs were her words.

"Why would they do this to you? It's okay I've got you." Alli smiled warmly

"He…hhee, saiid hhhe li-iked me-me." Clare sobbed

"I believe you, I can't believe I dared to call those monsters my friends! You are my friend!" Alli sobbed, it pained her to see her true and only best friend like this.

"I want to die." Clare whispered

"No! Don't you dare say that, if anyone deserves to die it's K.C. and Jenna!" Alli screamed

Clare sobbed into the arms of her tan and beautiful friend, minutes passed with echoes of sobs and 'shh-shh, It'll be okay' repeatedly filling the house.

"Alli?" Clare whispered

"Yes?" Alli looked deep into her eyes

"I've missed you." Clare smiled sadly

"I had more my friend." Alli grinned

They stayed there the whole entire night and embraced each other the same way a mother and a child would. Their friendship was an odd one, but a permanent and beneficial one as well. As they sobbed and rested against one another, they spoke of their lives that went on due to their temporary separation. Alli told Clare about life as a popular girl. While Clare revealed her secret friendship with Elijah Goldsworthy, and her devoting love for the boy as well. The thought of Eli is what drove Clare to peace. It was a good thing, the weekend followed the next day.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

The dance was amazing! I enjoyed myself very much, _while others didn't_. I caught up with Adam the next day we working on our ball control, passing and receiving at soccer practice when he asked me

"Dude, what did you think about yesterday?"

"What? The dance? It was cool." I smiled

"No, no. I mean about you friend Clare. Didn't you see?" Adam informed

"See what? Why? Did something happen to Clare? Is she okay?" _Why did I care so much?_

"I wish…" Adam said

"Tell me!" I demanded

"Whoa, okay…" Adam trailed off as he explained to me the entire dance incident with details.

"What the fuck?" I muttered

"I know right? Something was up, as if it were planned or something…" Adam said

"Why would you say that?" I was intrigued

"I mean, people were there watching it, Bianca said there was a fight, but there wasn't one when we got there, all we saw was Clare trying to kiss K.C. when we approached. And besides, I think it's a coincidence how Jenna pops out of nowhere; wouldn't she be with him from the start? I mean they went to the dance together didn't they?" Adam explained

"True…" I agreed

"Yeah. Just poor Clare, she was shoved, rejected, ridiculed, and despised in front of the whole school…" Adam said

"I got to go check and see if Clare is okay!" I exclaimed

I ditched soccer practice and went immediately to Clare's house. She answered the door.

"Eli?" She smiled faintly, her eyes were bloodshot red and she had dry tear stains on her glasses.

"I heard what happened. Are you okay?" I asked

"I will be. I rather not talk about it." Clare muttered

"I don't understand why they would do this to you, you are so sweet and nice…" I said as I looked deep into her eyes, _as if I looked into her beautiful soul_

The unexpected had then occurred. Clare Edwards kissed me. At first I was surprised and then I realized I had Julia.

"Whoa! What was that!" I yelled

"I thought that…" Clare spoke, but I interrupted her

"What the hell? I do have a girlfriend you know!" I was now a bit angry

"I'm sorry I just thought that..." She said

"Thought what?" I gave her a 'what the hell' look

"That… you liked me for a second." She whispered, she was facing the ground

"No, no! Just because I am trying to be a good friend does not mean anything! Geez, I just wanted to see if you were alright, not to have you plant your lips on me, when you know very well, I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND! I knew this friendship was a mistake from the start!" I stormed out of her house quickly and went home.

I walked in home and ran up to my room, not bothering to look at anything in my way, at first I was angry and shocked, now I feel disgusted and confused. Then later on, I felt guilty. I had broken off a friendship… but I think that it is for the best. However deep down, I knew why I felt **disgusted, shocked, guilty, and angry**. It was because, deep down, very deep down, like in the abyss of myself, I liked the kiss actually **a lot**, and it felt right too, as if it were meant to be. For those two seconds, I lost sight of who I was, and what I am expected to be. It was something that lit up inside of me, like fire. My brain however was too afraid and stubborn, shocked and disappointed to admit it. _**Admit that I might just have a thing for Clare Diane Edwards.**_

_**

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**_

author's note:

Hmmm. What did you guys think? Tell me! PLEASE! Did it suck; was it good, do you hate me? Well I'm glad/sorry to say this, but things are going to get more intense. You guys will be shocked even more next chapter. But hint, someone will get GORGEOUS later on in the future, for those of you that mention this in my reviews. I know it breaks my heart to see Clare get called these things, but it will soon be over, bear with me guys. LOL, it's just to build up drama. Just wait 'kay. Drama continues guys. :)

P.S. I might update Tomorrow or Friday!


	7. 8th Grade: To Leave or Take Part 2

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I didn't want to love him so much, however I did, I didn't even want to fall in too deep, yet I did. I gave him my dreams, and they still did not come true. Eli made me angry at life, even though I know it's my fault. I just got caught up in the moment; my actions were not well thought out. Some actions are in the control of us humans, while others are not. **My first kiss** and I blew it. I always wished Eli would be my first, but not like this. I've wanted to kiss Eli since the second grad. I however now, completely feel hopeless, it hurts too much to cry, and instead I felt numb. I realized that I could not go back to school and have everyone taunt and laugh at me with what happened at the dance. Even more, I could not return to see Eli; I did not even want to see him in pictures or anything. It didn't matter if it was the last week of school, there was no way I was going. I feel so worthless. This is a time when I needed a sister, **a big sister**, it was midnight and I couldn't sleep. So I grabbed a calling card and phoned Darcy, it was eight in the morning in Kenya.

"Hello?" Darcy answered

"Hey." I stated

"Clare, what are you doing calling me at…midnight in Canada?" Darcy seemed worried

"I just need a big sister right now." I muttered

"It has to do with the neighbor kid, doesn't it?" She asked

I then began my sob story, and told her everything: Julia, K.C., the dance, Eli, and the kiss.

"Ooh Clare, I want to tell you everything will be alright, but these are just lessons that you had to learn from, and make sure not to repeat the same mistakes again." Darcy informed

"I know…I just feel, that I am suffocating each day…I don't know… I just want to get away from everything. I swear, each minute is killing me here, I just want to die." I sobbed; I was now crying and admitted to Darcy my depression.

"…Clare…Pass. Me. To. Mom. Now." Darcy ordered, she sounded worried and scared; I guess my confession got her frightened.

"She's sleeping." I whispered

"Clare, please I need to talk to her." Darcy begged

I passed Darcy to my mom, she was angry I was up so late, however she started speaking with Darcy, my father was paying attention as well. I could only manage to hear my mother and father gasping and saying 'Are you sure', 'what?', 'we have to do something.', and 'I will ask her.'

It was Sunday, three in the morning, my mom just hung up the phone and walked into my room and looked as if she was crying, and she then sat down next to me on my bed and hugged me tightly. I couldn't help but sob once my face made contact with her chest.

"Honey, why didn't you tell me you were getting picked on so badly?" She asked concerned

"I always have been mom." I sobbed

"I've talked to Darcy, you really are sad being here aren't you?" My mother was sad as well

"I hate it here, this country, everywhere it's the same. I want to die." I blurted

My mother gasped.

"Clare, we can't let that happen. We can't move either, your father's job require him here, and transferring you would be pointless." She explained

"But! I can't be here, I feel like I am suffocating with all these insults, taunts, and torture!" I cried

"I know…this worries Darcy a lot too. She suggested that… you go stay with her at Kenya for a while."

"Kenya?" I asked

"Yes, Darcy lives in a safe area near the capital city; you could be homeschooled by mail. You can only be there for a little while, as long as you need to…to feel 'worth living' again." My mother said stiffly

I thought and wondered, if this is right for me?

"Is it really that necessary?" I asked

"Clare…the idea is a bit too much to handle, but your happiness is what really matters, you're going through a really rough time. You're suicidal, depressed…**anything** to stop it before it gets out of control." My mother cried

"I'm not that pathetic mom, but I do feel like this problem will escalade if I stay here." I replied

"Then, it's your choice sweetie." My mother said

I thought about it, I know it's pathetic to be sad over a boy, but it wasn't just him. Even though I hate to admit it, I am in a way being bullied; I was too defenseless to do anything about it so…

"I'll go." I decided

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, more than ever, I need to get out of here, before I…I do something stupid" I stated proudly

"Flights are only available next Sunday, Darcy told me." My mother said

"Fine by me, but I don't want to go to school this week." I stated

"Clare…it's the last week." My mother reasoned

"I just can't…please; they can mail me my graduation certificate." I begged

"I'll have to speak with your father about this. You should start packing tomorrow." My mother cried

"Mommy?" I said

"Yes honey?"

"Thank you…for caring, I'm going to miss you." I sighed

"Don't say your good byes, just yet."

Eventually my parents decided that it was okay for me not to return to school. I know I am a coward for doing this, and running away from my problems won't solve anything. But, it harms me too much just thinking about facing those people, let alone what if I faced them? I never stepped outside or looked outside the window, I did not want to see Eli, and remember the way he broke my heart. **It killed me**.

Alli visited me everyday afterschool. I was glad that she was my friend again. She offered to stand up for me at school, but I didn't want her to get dragged into the drama. When I told her I was leaving to Kenya, she was somber; however she knew I did need to get away from this hellhole. I would miss her a lot, but we will call each other every week.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V. **

I now felt like a total douche bag. What I hated, I had dare I treat Clare, the way I did! She was nice to me no matter what. And I detested her; I never knew she had feelings for me though, not since the third grade. _Unless she had liked me all these years_. She did not come to school on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, or today. Our graduation was tomorrow and I knew she wasn't coming as well. Some kids spread cruel rumors of how she committed suicide, ran to the hills, and transferred. I personally wanted to punch all of those who still ridiculed her in the absence of her presence. Most importantly, I wanted to punch myself. I knew that what I did was wrong. But…I am afraid. I now know I like her, but it scares the living shit out of me. I don't want to see her get hurt, I can't…Clare and I are so different, _yet so similar_. This is the girl that knows everything about me, more than Adam, Julia, and my parents. She knew me so well, because I realized that when I was with Clare, I felt so liberated, happy, and certain. Sometimes, I would see past those horrid glasses and see those gorgeous crystal blue eyes. I would look behind those braces and see an alluring smile. _I would see behind all of that, and see a beautiful soul_. But I decided that I can't. I don't even want to see her. I cannot look at her and regret everything that I had caused…what's done is done. I just hope she can forgive me one day.

Today was Friday, June 15. My graduation. It all came down to this. I wore a burgundy button down dress shirt and black slacks. Everyone was happy; Julia looked beautiful in her violet dress. All were eager and were having a graduation party at Fitz's house. After we received our diplomas we headed over there. It was all fun, which is until; K.C. snuck in some alcohol, Drew took a shot. Alli got angry at him and left. Then Fitz took some too, next thing you know so did Bianca, Jenna, Julia, and all the others at the party. I was so disappointed, I refused some. I mean come on? Are people that pathetic to be "cool"? I walked Julia home; she had to pull her act together for her parents. I made sure she got there safe and sound, I then went home myself.

As I walked home, I noticed that Clare's bedroom light was still turned on; she looked like she was folding her laundry or something. Too bad she's not my friend anymore. The next day I started off the summer at soccer practice with Adam, tomorrow was our city championship finals at the park, I waited for this day since I joined my little league soccer team when I was ten.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

Today was Sunday. I was leaving for a while, I noticed that Eli was not home and remembered it was his city championship finals. He's been boasting about it for weeks and even asked me to come, that's until all this mess had occurred. I grabbed my luggage, and dragged it to the trunk of the car. I got inside the car with my mother and father. My mom was crying, and my dad looked sad.

"You ready kiddo?" My dad asked

"I don't really have a choice I guess." I fake smiled

"Well let's get going." My mother chimed

As we drove through town, I looked at everything for one last time until who knows when. I watched all these memories slip by, the Dot, the Community Pool, the Library, the Tattoo Parlor, the stores, Degrassi elementary, middle, and high school, everything. Then we reached the park. _Eli was playing his match_.

"Stop." I said abruptly

"Is everything alright Clare-bear?" My father asked

"I just…want to see the park one last time…you know how much I loved it here as I kid." I said

"We're going to miss your flight…" my mother replied

"I promise I won't take any longer than two minutes." I begged

"Alright, let her go Helen. Two minutes, Clare." My father replied

I stepped out of the car; I needed to see Eli **one more time**. I could not leave and every time remember him with the same face when he rejected me. As I ran through the park, I saw him. Julia was cheering him with the others. I stared at him swiftly, as I stood there like an idiot; tears ran through my cheeks and eyes. I then made eye contact a second with him, and ran back to my car.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I was really focused in my game, when I felt that someone was staring at me, I was about to make the final goal, as I turned around and saw Clare. She stared at me…crying. I looked around and saw all looking at me with confusion; it was a moment in which a second was an hour. Clare then ran away, and BAM! The other team snatched the ball from me and shot a goal. They won. I was frustrated and sad that we lost, because of me. Yet more upset, to see Clare cry and run away just like that…something was up. I now knew I would talk to her and confess to her my feeling about her, apologize, and beg, **anything for her when I would get home**.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

As we reached the airport, I couldn't stop crying. My mother thought it was because I would miss her and my father. I wish. It was because I would miss Eli, I was leaving my heart with him, but one day I shall return for it. I was about to enter the terminal and was saying goodbye to my parents.

"Take care sweetie!" My mother cried

"When you come back _**you'll be different**_, I can see it now." My father smiled

"I'll miss you mom and dad, thank you for this. I love you." I smiled

"We do too. Say hi to Darcy for us and do not fight with her okay." My mother smiled warmly

"And when you come back, I expect my sweet daughter back." My father stated

"I love you." I said again and cried

As I boarded the plane, I cried uncontrollably the entire way; the flight attendants thought that I was afraid of planes. _If only they knew why though_. The flight was 19 hours! I was distracted the entire way though. My mind had only one thing in thought, Eli of course.

"_Please all passengers prepare for arrival, we have arrived in Kenya, it was pleasure to have you all on board. Have a safe trip."_

The pilot had announced we were here, as I boarded off the plane, a big sign said 'Karibu na Kenya!' _Welcome to Kenya._ I couldn't help but see that instead of 'Kenya' all I saw was 'Welcome to a New Beginning'.

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**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Sorry this is so rushed, but we need to move on! LOL. The next two chapters will be their separate points of view as time goes by. Ch. 8: Eli's Point of view & Ch.9: Clare's Point of view. Tell me what you think :D

P.S. Thank you for the reviews! I am so thankful. I enjoy to read all your thoughts on my story, even though some of you get…frustrated. Hahaha! **I'll update tomorrow or Saturday!**


	8. 9th Grade: She's On Your Mind

**YEAR: 2008-2009**

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I was back home from my soccer city championship finals. I was lost and depressed. I trained for this for three years and lost. However the image of Clare killed me on the inside. I ditched Julia and left. In that instant, I felt Clare's pain, and I hated myself. And at the same moment when I looked at those tears streaming down her face, I realized that **I truly do like** **Clare Diane Edwards**. I was planning to pour my heart out on her, and I hope it will all work out. I walked towards her house. Mrs. Edwards answered the door, she looked sad.

"Hello Eli." She smiled weakly; I was familiar in the Edwards house since my friendship with Clare bloomed.

"Hello." I smiled back

"I don't mean to be rude Eli…but what are you doing here?"

"Oh, I am here to see Clare of course."

"Clare? I thought she notified all her friends?" Mrs. Edwards gave a questioning look

"Inform what?" I was curious

"Inform that she left to Kenya."

"Kenya?" I gasped

"Yes you didn't know?"

"No…when will she be back? Why did she leave?" I asked. _What the hell?_

"Well, I do not know when, and she left because some kids taunted her in school…did you know about this?"

"Well, yes, but we didn't really communicate in school…"

"I see. I have no idea why she did not tell you though; youtwo_ were such good friends_."

"Yeah…thanks Mrs. Edwards."

For some reason my heart broke into pieces when I found that Clare left. I regretted so badly, the way I treated her, the way I hid our beautiful friendship, and the fact that I rejected the best kiss I ever had. It'd be pretty conceded to say that she left because of me, but I know she left partly because of me. I hated myself so dearly. For the first time since my father yelled at me for kicking a soccer ball at the neighbor's window when I was eight, I Eli Goldsworthy, _**cried**_. I lost it, this girl made me crazy, and she was gone when I realized it. Karma is a bitch. I never thought Clare Edwards would be the first to break my heart. I miss her. I would have to start Degrassi High School without her.

I broke up with Julia a couple days later. It wasn't pretty, went something along the line like…

**FLASHBACK**

We were in the dot on a date when Julia was about to kiss me, but I stopped her

"What's wrong Elijah?" She shook her eyelashes; HOW I HATED THE WAY SHE CALLED ME ELIJAH!

"Listen Julia, we need to talk."

"About what?"

"Us."

"Us? Why if everything is going great!" She grinned

"It is, but, I just think…we need to break up."

"WHY?"

Everyone inside the Dot was staring at the both of us.

"Julia…it's just for the best. I need a break."

"A break for what!"

"I have stuff on my mind…"

"What type of stuff?"

"Clare Edwards." I could not hide it anymore

"That…that monster! She deserved what I did to her!" Julia spilled, I got the impression she said something she shouldn't have.

"What do you mean!"

"Well…" Julia was proud enough to say everything she did to Clare, I was now pissed.

"Are you fucking messed! What's wrong with you! You act like you did a good thing! You sicken me Julia!"

"Eli! I don't give a fuck what you think of me now, if you give adamn about that bitch, then you aren't worth my time!" Julia screamed, we were kicked out of the Dot, we continued this conversation outside.

"Don't talk about her like that! I was friends with her the whole time and I don't give a damn if it disgusts you or whatever! We're over."

"Fuck you!" Julia screamed

I ignored her from then on. She had the nerve to still be a part of our group. Surprisingly, nobody cared that I **was **friends with Clare. However, I thought less of all of them except for Adam. Fitz and K.C. desperately tried to gain my trust again, but I never caved. They knew that without my friendship, they were nobodies. I moved on and Julia had the nerve to try and get back together with me, but Clare was on mind now, **all the time**. It's true what they say, you never know what you got, until it's gone.

All forgot that there even was a Clare Edwards in Degrassi Middle School. They only remembered her as the girl who was socially ridiculed, only to have a micro spick of dust as her reputation that she left. I on the other hand saw it to be huge, something that I will never forget. Clare was not just another girl, she was…special. I never met someone as perfect as her, people wouldn't notice because of her appearance, but I managed to see the true beauty within…**my Clare**.

Adam knew how I felt and was supportive. He then suggested I should send her a card and tell her how I felt. I asked Mrs. Edwards if she could mail it to her for me, I sent her a birthday card with an apology as well.

High school was alright. So were the parties. Girls would come on to me, but they were all the same. Dull, superficial, self-absorbed, materialistic, **not Clare**. She was on my mind 24/7; I was going crazy and lovesick. I just remembered her kiss, and remember how I rejected her. I felt like slapping myself so much. I couldn't move on no matter how hard I tried.

One day I was walking home and ran into Alli, she and Drew broke up a few months ago.

"Hey, you." I smiled

"Hi, what's up!" She grinned

"Nothing you?" I smiled

"Time went by so fast, can you believe we're tenth graders in three months!" Alli grinned

"Actually, this year has been an eternity." I chuckled

"How's Clare?" I asked

"Clare…Eli, I don't think she would like me talking to you." Alli replied

"So, you do know how she is, why would she not like me talking to you?"

"Eli, you weren't exactly a gentleman with my friend, you…really _hurt_ her."

"I know, but just tell me is she okay?"

"Why do you care?"

"Because, I realized I always did…just tell me if she's okay."

"Only if you tell me how Drew is?"

"You miss him don't you…he does too. He's alright, but I think he would be better with you."

"Oh, well Clare's good too. Don't worry." Alli smiled

"Thank you, tell her I…miss her **so much**." I smiled

"I'll see what I can do, goodbye Eli."

"Bye."

Summer began, time did go by fast when I realized it. It was the night before school would begin into our tenth grade year, and I heard the Edwards car pull up in the driveway at midnight, I wondered why they came back at this hour. Then I saw Mr. Edwards brining in suitcases inside the house, and saw Mrs. Edwards hugging someone, but it was too dark to see. All I heard was "Welcome home sweetie!", then it hit me…_**Clare was back**_.

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**AUTHORS NOTE:**

OMFG! JK! Next chapter is on Clare's P.O.V. While gone…it'll be pretty long, and then ch.10 will be tenth grade! YAY! The moment we've all been waiting for people CH.10! I will post ch.9 tomorrow…MAYBE.

TO "ECLARETHELOVERS": Questions answered

1. I know…people can't change in 2 months that's why I made it a year.

2. You've just read when Clare comes back

3. I don't know, if I should kill Julia, it's been done too much in other fanfics, I might add a twist though…IDK, and I'm going to hold on to Julia for now…

**As always tell me what you think loves! **

**:)**

***3***

**:D**


	9. 9th Grade: Getting Over You

First of all I got to say: Thank yo so much you guys for reading and liking this story! I love your reviews! Really all of you are awesome! :)

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**Clare's P.O.V.**

As I arrived the airport, a gorgeous girl with maple eyes and hazelnut flowy hair approached me. _Darcy_.

"Clare!" She smiled and tan towards me

"Darce! I've missed you. You are prettier!" I grinned

"You've…well you have definitely grown!" She replied

"I know a couple pounds or so." I was giggling

"Well, that's going to have to change, here in Kenya, our only transportation is walking, but today is an exception." She grinned back

"I've really missed you Darce."

"Oh Clare, I'm just so glad I won't be lonely anymore!" Darcy chimed

We had arrived to the city later on and had reached Darcy's beautiful apartment. She had now been promoted to a Director of Social Services in the charity area of Kenya. This meant she worked at home and got paid very well.

I was home schooled by Darcy, recently, but I managed to make friends with the neighbor's kids, they were five years younger than me however. Kenya was really beautiful. Darcy wasn't kidding when she mentioned that walking was her only transportation. It was too much trouble for Darcy to get a car, since the area was pretty busy and parking was a fortune. I even jogged with her every morning in the area, it was safe and many people were active around there as well. I can now see why Darcy loved it here, it was a freedom that this country gave me which I could never have in Canada. I felt like…I could be who I want because it was a fresh start; I couldn't be judged or ridiculed, because I realized that these are **just people**. They can't ridicule me for my flaws because it inhumane to be perfect.

Now you may be wondering, where my feelings stand for Elijah Goldsworthy. I can't deny it, I still love him. Darcy suggested I should get over him, but I can't. I wish I could control my emotions, but it's too hard. I cannot go without a day of not thinking about him. I spoke with Alli every week on the phone, she told me how Eli was, everything…if he wore his black fade jeans or his back skinny jeans today, **everything**. Not to mention, a few days after I left, word got out that Eli broke up with Julia. Surprisingly some said it was because of me, that is those who were at the dot, and others said it was because Eli was cheating on Julia. I knew it was the second one, only in my wildest dreams Eli would break up with Julia because of me, but this was reality. As time went by my heart was able to pick up the mess Eli had made. **I was getting over him**. One day I woke up and went by my usual day, being home schooled and my usual jogs with Darcy out in the city. By the next day I realized I had gone an entire day without thinking of Eli. Similar days followed after that, for some reason I now felt **empty**. For the first time in seven years, Eli had dissolved in the thoughts and feelings of my own world. I will never hate him for what he did to me, it's not his fault he didn't like me. It' not like he embarrassed me in front of hundreds of egoistic children. Like K.C. I hate him. Eli is 'whatever' to me now, and I simply do not give a hillbilly if he talks to me or not. For some strange reason, a part of me wishes I could hate him, but I can't.

I was now fourteen years old, today was my birthday. My mother and father mailed me some new clothes, and money to get laser eye surgery, since my optometrist noticed that my eyesight was getting poorer with the glasses on. I also received a beautiful cross necklace from Alli, it was real silver. I loved the fact that we both had respect for each other's beliefs. **Then**, there was a beautiful birthday card from Eli, I hesitated to open the envelope and read:

_Dear Clare,_

_Happy Birthday! I know you were not expecting this. But I remembered. I just want to say, that I'm sorry for rejecting you the way I did, I was too stubborn in the moment to realize that, Clare I like you a lot. I miss you like crazy. I'm sorry for not being there when you needed me the most. I can't sleep at night knowing that I caused you pain in some sort of way. You are special to me, and all that really matters is that if you could ever forgive me. I hope you are happy, because you deserve it. Call me anytime._

_Eli_

M heart literally skipped a beat. Not because what I deeply desired since I was seven years old came true. But because, I couldn't believe it. Eli Goldsworthy: the most attractive, smartest, talented, desired, perfect boy liked me. I've been through this situation before, I was naïve, but as Darcy said, it was a lesson so I wouldn't repeat the same mistake. _Just another K.C. _I did not believe a word the letter had said. It may be true but that's a one percent chance. I knew Eli, if he was willing to hide a friendship from his friends for two years; he probably was lying to me at this moment as well.

One day Alli called me as usual

"Hey Clare. How was your birthday?"

"It was great…except Eli send me a birthday card…" I was then explaining Alli what was written inside the card

"Do you thinks it's true?" Alli asked

"No. I'm not falling for that one again."

"Just because K.C. did that mistake with you doesn't mean Eli is the same."

"I just…no, Eli would never have feelings for me."

"Well…That reminds me!" Alli yelped

"What Alli?"

"Well, the other day Eli and I were talking then he asked me how you were, he says he misses you a lot." Alli squealed

"Yeah right, now he's using you to pawn me, the same way K.C. used his friends."

"Stop comparing! Clare, he was really sincere, he seemed kind of sad."

"Well, he can be sad all he wants, he broke my heart and I….I got over him already I don't need this."

"I'm sorry Clare."

"Don't be, I just cannot **develop feelings for Eli again**. Okay?" I sighed

"I see, I'm sorry, the same thing happens with Drew for me."

"Listen it's getting late over here, I got to go." I answered

"Bye. Take care." Alli replied sweetly

"You too. I'll call you in two weeks 'kay."

"Of course bff!" Alli chimed, then hung up

It was June and I had received my laser eye surgery, the next day I went to the salon and got a haircut, the weather here was so hot, so I cut my hair short, long hair was making me feel hotter in all this humid temperature. One day I woke up and walk into the living room. Darcy's jaw dropped for some reason.

"Clare…" Darcy gasped

"What's wrong, do I have something on my face?' I asked

"No…I never really noticed, but…you're **beautiful**!" Darcy gasped

"Me?" I asked, and then Darcy dragged me towards a mirror

"Look at yourself Clare! Really look!" Darcy pointed at my reflection in the mirror

I then noticed…I lost all the weight I once had. My eyes were crystal blue, only to be noticed with my glasses off. My hair wasn't poofy or tangled anymore, if not curly and soft. I guess I've grown.

"I…look different."

"You do! I guess all that jogging paid off! Also seems like someone has grown in other areas as well…" Darcy pointed at my chest

My bra didn't fit me anymore….I was…

"Clare-Bear! You have big titties!" Darcy squeezed my chest

"Darcy!"

"Catch me if you can!" Darcy giggled and ran away

"Got you!" I grabbed her boobs then too, only that Darcy was flat, hahaha.

"Looks like we have to go bra shopping!" Darcy laughed

"I guess so."

I looked at myself in the mirror one more time, and went out the door to the city. Along the way, all teenage boys stared at me, practically undressing me with their eyes. I mentally gagged. So this was what attention felt like? I hate it. I was whistled at least ten times in one day. Mental note to myself: Buy new pants too; they were tight in my hip and rear-end area as well.

It was the end of August, then Darcy received a phone call from her job, they were making her work in schoolhouses for uneducated children in the area, this meant she wasn't going to be home all the time. Then my parents said I had to come back home, they already enrolled me in school. I was sad at leaving Darcy, but she was happy to work with children. Alli was excited to know that I was coming back home, I made her promise not to tell anyone though. My parents were ecstatic and thrilled. I was confident; I was ready to face **all of them **back at Degrassi Community High School. If they think they can hurt me again, they are dead wrong.

I was boarding the plane, as Darcy was smiling and waving me goodbye. She seemed she would be okay with me leaving. I was happy and angry to come back home. The flight took forever though I would arrive at Canada at ten at night. Then I would have to go to school the next day. Oh Joy.

As I boarded of the plan I had to go through checks, and airport security, it took about an hour. I was walking towards the gates and saw my parents. They looked clueless, waiting for me, they didn't recognize me, and I then approached them.

"Excuse me." I tugged on my father's coat

"Yes, can I help you miss?" He smiled

"You don't recognize me?" I giggled

"I'm sorry; I think you've mistaken me for someone else." He replied

My mother froze when she heard my voice and her eyes bulged out of her face. Her eyes examined me from head to toe and then made eye contact with me only to squeal.

"Clare!" She screamed, with her hands out in the air only to run and hug me tightly

"Mom!" I replied with tears of joy filling my eyes

My dad stood there dumbfounded, as if he felt like an idiot. He didn't recognize his own daughter, and playfully slapped himself.

"Clare-Bear? Is that really you…my baby girl?" He asked worried

"Of course it is daddy!' I squealed

He then walked over and hugged me, then twirled me around

"You've…really grown. You're so **beautiful**, sweetie!" He smiled and looked deep into my eyes

"So I have been told." I shrugged

"You've lost a lot of weight. And your new haircut is simply…oh so divine!" My mother cooed

"We've missed you honey!" They said in unison

We then walked to the car. The ride was filled with stories of my adventures in Kenya, and how I was being home schooled. Then Darcy and what we would do in Kenya together. We then arrived to the town; everything was the same way when I left: the Dot, the Community Pool, the Library, the Tattoo Parlor, the schools, **and the park**. We arrived home at midnight, I couldn't help but look over at Eli's bedroom window, _he was sleeping probably_. I walked inside my home; it was the same as well, except for one thing…my room.

"Mom, Dad, why is my room filled with books, papers, and two desks?" I asked concerned

"Oh! Gosh! Well, while you were gone, your father got promoted and needed a home office for his spare time, you're room was fairly small so we decided to give you Darcy's room, since she's gone, by the way it's much bigger, we moved all your stuff there." My mother reasoned

"Oh. No problem." I replied'

I walked upstairs to go to bed, I wasn't mad that they moved me here, it was an upgrade anyways. I was just frustrated that this bedroom window was facing Eli's room. The same bedroom window which I used to spy on him when I was younger. Ironic isn't it? I went to sleep, and would have to wake up at six since Alli was going to catch up with me and then take me to school. I would only have six hours of sleep, and I was jetlagged, but I got plenty of sleep on the plane, so I was good. I couldn't help but wonder how the next day was going to be, because all I got to say is 'I'm back bitches!' Just kidding, but the feeling is similar. _Pardon me God for my cursing_.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

There it is. Now Clare is gorgeous, you guys don't have to suffer anymore! Yay! Tell me if it was good, bad, if I need to update, do you hate me, love me…etc.

I'll see when I can update, cause I think my computer is getting viruses :(

But I'll update for sure!


	10. 10th Grade: Out On The Bearded Barley

**I DO NOT OWN DEGRASSI: JUST THE IDEAS FR THIS STORY.**

**My inspiration for this chapter was the song 'Kiss Me' by Sixpence None the Richer :D**

**First off I want to give a shout out to 3 reviews that caught my eye**

trojanhearse1800: I know, I saw that and was a bit angry to see that, I'm definitely going to change the summary. But I don't mind any more, it's a free country, and it's not like I was the first person to ever come up with an idea like that, my inspiration for this story was 90's movies. LOL. As long as the story 'INNOCENT', doesn't copy my storyline, I'm cool, if they do… ;(

madame-degrassi-girl101: You totally made my day :)

Peanut butter: I'm sorry to say this, but I'm not a bieber fan, as for the others not at all either, so I really don't care if they take him back. Hahaha

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**Clare's P.O.V**

I woke up at 5:30 in the morning, I was surprisingly filled with energy, and I took a shower. I dressed in my button down peach blouse with my white lacey skirt. I applied a small hint of makeup, Darcy taught me that not too much or too little, just enough to make my eyes pop with a pink eye shadow and a bit of eyeliner and my raspberry lip gloss. I wanted to look good for Alli only. Not the boys or others, for Alli, I wanted her to notice how I progressed physically. Then the doorbell rang, as I opened the door I swear Alli looked like she was going to faint, instead she screamed 'Oh My God!', loud enough to wake up the neighborhood, since I heard someone scream 'Shut-Up!' from across the street.

"Clare…is that really you!" Alli squealed

"I've missed you too Alli!" I giggled and hugged her tightly

"Oh Clare…I want to cry but my mascara is going to run." She giggled

Then she pulled away as her eyes gazed around my body.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer." I laughed

"I probably should, but I would have to make copies, because the boys will want one! You're gorgeous!" Alli chuckled

"Eww." I simply stated

"Just imagine K.C., Fitz, Adam, and _**Eli**_'s faces one they take a look at you!" Alli replied

"No thanks. Boys are not on my mind. Come on let's eat breakfast." I said

"Clare…I really missed my best friend." Alli said happily

As we ate our eggs and bacon, Alli told me what happened all this time. Rumor had it Jenna was pregnant, but got an abortion. Also Bianca was said to be giving 'favors' in the boiling room. Julia was dating a freshman in college named Kyle, supposedly he took her virginity. _Slut_. Drew hasn't spoke with Alli, but has been heard to say that he still loves her. K.C. was going at it with other girls, with his partner in crime: Fitz. Adam was still…Adam. And Eli…he was thankfully good. We then walked out the door and headed to school, my first class was at the back of the school, I was late. _Crap_. I then rushed through the empty hallways and reached my first period: Advanced English.

**

* * *

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**Eli's P.O.V**

I woke up and remembered last night, I think it was all a dream. _Clare can't be back_. I went to school in my new hearse from my dad, I always wanted a car, but a hearse…was the cherry on top! People thought it was weird, but I didn't care, some girls found it **awkwardly attractive**, and the guys found it **rebellious**. As usual, I saw the gang in their usual routine. Bianca was texting. Jenna and Julia were rehearsing for the power squad. Drew was with Adam tossing the football. K.C. and Fitz were flirting with a blonde and brunette. Then a girl approached me, she was…pretty.

"Hey, I've noticed you Elijah Goldsworthy." She giggled

"Good. Your eyes work." I replied. _I was annoyed being called fucking, damn, shit ELIJAH!_

_What the hell did she want?_ As soon as she opened her mouth I was **not **interested

"So…here's my number, you can call _anytime_." She winked and walked away

I immediately crumbled the piece of paper and threw it away. It's not the cliché scene, where I couldn't move on from Clare or Julia. I got over that shit, right away as Clare never replied to my damn letter. I know she received it too, since her mother told me that everything got perfectly mailed to her. I simply and sincerely didn't want to repeat the same mistake that I did with Julia. I am not going to be with a girl that lacks a serious personality. I guess I'm back where I was in middle school, looking for _the one_.

The bell rang and I walked with Adam to my first period: Advanced English. I loved English! I entered the class and took a seat, we were placed in alphabetical order, and there was a name tag on my desk. I was far away from Adam. Oh well. Then Ms. Dawes, _our teacher_, was beginning her boring speech, I was falling asleep…all I heard was

_Students it's a pleasure to have you all…syllabus…homework…back in my day…blah…blah…blah_

Then I heard that a girl came late to class and all I heard was

_Sorry…late…lost…your name..._**Clare Edwards**

I immediately froze to hear that name. It wasn't a dream last night then. **Clare was back**. I shot my face back up and looked only to see the most gorgeous girl ever. She had milky pale luxurious skin, a curvy silhouette as her body, _never seen so many curves in my life_, soft and glossy auburn curls that bounce at each step she made, lump and pink soft lips, and crystal blue eyes. The eyes gave it away…**this is Clare**. I almost drooled literally. It was a moment when a chorus of angels sang in the background when I looked at her.

I wasn't the only one to notice…all the boys were practically undressing her with their eyes, some actually had their jaws hit the floor. Girls looked jealous and huffed at the loss of attention they had with the guys. I looked over at Adam too, he was drooling! I got jealous so much, and I haven't even spoken to her. The feelings rushed back in an instant. She was six seats away from me, and gave her full attention in class the whole time, as others stared at her, she didn't notice. I was one of those who were staring at her the whole time as well, and I couldn't help but smile when I looked at her. She didn't see that I was in the class.

After class, many offered to walk her to her second period, she sweetly denied all. She then bumped into me and apologized.

"Oh gosh! I'm so sorry!" She begged

"No need to. I t was my fault…Clare." I said cooly

"Eli?" she looked nicely

"I see you're back." I smiled

"Yeah, well see you later, my next period is far from here." She replied quickly and walked away

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I bumped into Eli. I did not notice him until I looked up and saw his emerald eyes and shiny charcoal hair flipped right into place. He looked more handsome than before. Strangely…I didn't feel anything special when I saw him though, just a physical attraction, but that's as far as my **feelings could go**. I felt uncomfortable in school, everyone was staring at me. _Was there something on my face?_ The day went by pretty fast and caught up with Alli at lunch.

"So where do we go?" I asked

"Clare, I'm so sorry, but I have to go talk to my counselor about my schedule, I'm going to have to leave you alone this lunch." She frowned

"It's okay, I want to catch up with some people anyways." I smiled

"Cool, wait for me after school at the lockers 'kay, I'll go over your house." Alli grinned

With that she left. I then reached the cafeteria, only to see my two friends from middle school, I wanted to talk to: Connor and Wesley.

**

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**

**Eli's P.O.V.**

Lunch came, and our group was at our usual table hanging out. Julia was sitting next to me, and I noticed she caressed my hand and winked at me. I quietly rejected her gestures. My mind was somewhere else. Adam and I were talking about our soccer match this week against Lakehurst, when suddenly Clare walked through the door.

"Whoa! Why haven't I seen that angel before?" Fitz sighed, as he was lost into the divine beauty of the goddess that passed by

"Man…that's a body I want to smash!" K.C. grinned _God I was going to punch him._

"She's not even that pretty, if you ask me." Julia snarled, with the agreement of Bianca and Jenna to be followed.

All the guys, including myself shot her a 'Are-You-Blind?' look

"Well, no one did ask you." Fit replied

"I call dibs." Fitz yelped

"No way, **that** is a piece I want." K.C. smiled perverted

"She is not an object you horn dogs." I replied angrily

"Why so defensive Elijah?" Julia seemed jealous

"First, it's and only is Eli. Secondly, she would never go for you two." I pointed at both K.C. and Fitz

"And why is that?" Fitz wondered

"'Cause…that angel over there is Clare Edwards, the one you two were such a dick for many years." Adam snickered

All stood there with priceless expressions. The girls look like their eyes spun around their sockets, and their head did a double flip. The guys looked so retarded, their smiles and pride were diminished.

Our eyes followed to see where Clare was going, she sat down with the most unpopular kids in school: Connor and Wesley.

"What is she doing with **those** two morons?" Fitz was angry

"She can do whatever she wants." I smiled

"You were good friends with her weren't you?" K.C. asked

"And?" I replied in a snobbish manner

"Well, hook me up dude?" _How dare he! He made her life hell!_

"May I remind you what you did to her two years ago?" I snarled

"And…she fell for me once." K.C. chuckled

"You're such a douche bag!" I yelled and walked away from them all, only to be followed by Adam

I was outside sitting at one of the benches

"Dude, you haven't gotten over her huh?" Adam asked

"Nope, and it's a lot harder now." I said

"So is she like…the one?"

"Don't say that stuff man."

"Well…what is she?" Adam asked curiously

"It's been a while for me to remember actually." I trailed off

"Well…Eli, I'd give it all you got, 'cause there's a whole entire school after Ms. Edwards." Adam stated

"I know." I clenched my fist.

**

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**Clare's P.O.V.**

During lunch, Wesley and Connor spoke with me, their attitudes were the same to me from the time we were friends. They were nice and charming gentlemen. After school, Alli and I were at my house, she left shortly after. As I was working on fixing up my 'new' room, I couldn't help but look over at Eli's window, there he was: reading and Edgar Allan Poe book, with a concentrated face, he then stepped outside, and I saw that he went for a run; I then noticed he came back an hour later. He was sweating and panted ferociously, he walked into his room and pulled off his shirt, his chiseled/ toned abs were revealed. I blushed, and then looked away. _Who wouldn't?_ I then went to go take a shower.

When I came out and dressed, I began to focus on a new book my parents bought me.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I was at home, recently took a shower, since I went out for my daily jog. I then noticed something…Clare Edwards was across my bedroom window. _Yes!_ I glanced over and saw she was reading a book, sitting on her bed Indian-style. She looked so beautiful. I then peaked out my window and saw that hers was open as well. She was listening to a song on the radio:

_Kiss me, out of the bearded barley  
Nightly, beside the green, green grass  
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step  
You wear those shoes and I will wear that dress._

How I did want to kiss her.

"What are you reading?" I yelled across from my bedroom window, she looked up and walked towards her bedroom window

"'_Me Talk Pretty One Day'_" She smiled

"Ahh, by David Sedaris. It's a good one." I chuckled

"Yes." She looked down

There was an awkward silence, and I decide to break it

"So, why did you leave?" I asked concerned

"Do I really have to answer that?" She looked sad

"No, I'm sorry. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable. Can you at least tell me why you never replied to my card though? I poured my heart out to you on that letter." I said sincerely

"At the moment, I was already over you, like at this time. I moved on." She replied seriously

"Problem is…I haven't."

"It wasn't a problem when I was head over heels for you, now was it?" She said

She was right. When she liked me, I didn't give a damn. And know I expect her to care about my sudden feelings. _I am an asshole_.

"You're right." I looked away

"I got to go…I'll see you around." She shut her window and closed her curtains after.

After she left and I stood outside thinking, I finally realized that **my mission is to win back Clare Edwards' heart.**


	11. 10th Grade: There She Goes

_QUESTIONS:_

_Jocie_: **And also what about her braces?**: Glad you mentioned that, I forgot to write about them, But they were removed, sorry I usually write my stories in an hour or so, so I was in a rush.

_Loveit:_ **question here what grade are they in**: 10th it's in the chapter name

**Eli has the hearse meaning he's 16 at least and then**: I just made him drive at 15, meaning he has a permit, but it's DegrassiWorld, so anything can happen :)

**Adam said they tortured her two years ago so did they spend two years apart when she was in Kenya: **She was in the 8th grade when she left but since her birthday is in March, she was 14 and is 15 now, yet back into the other year when she barely began 8th grade she was thirteen, that's why Adam says two years. Confusing isn't it? :P

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**Clare' P.O.V.**

I couldn't help but get angry at Eli. How could he in a moment like this embrace his feelings to me? The past is the past and I have focused on forgetting him, K.C., Julia, Fitz, and all those other people. Even though they are a part of my life now, all I truly want is a new beginning. I can't go back, to everything, I worked too hard to forget. The entire week was fine with me, which is until Fitz approached me at lunch the next day while I was putting my books away in my locker.

"Need help with those." Fitz stared into my eyes

I simply ignored him and walked away, only to have him grab my arm and smugly ask

"Hey, hey, hey, slow your roll, all I offered was to help." He smiled, _oh how I wanted to smack him_

"I don't need any help, ironic isn't it: you helping me, I expected at least an insult." I replied

"Look…I'm sorry for the past, but _this is the present_; let me make it up to you…how about you and me, the dot, afterschool anything you want…**beautiful**." He had a cheap grin plastered on his face

"No thanks. Frankly, I do not want any association with you. Goodbye." I simply stated and walked away

Then…there was K.C. on Wednesday:

I was walking home, when a busty red car pulled up next to me on the sidewalk

"Need a ride darling?" K.C. asked from his car window

I walked away and ignored him too.

He then got out of the car and approached me

"Hey, I'm sorry for before, but I truly did like you in the past…how about that kiss from two years ago?" He winked

I then slapped him.

"How dare you? Do not talk to me ever again! If you get near me ever again…I'll…" K.C. then grabbed me tightly and pulled me in his chest

"You'll what…come on Clare…you're so…**gorgeous**…" He was about to kiss me as I squirmed and turned my head away from him, only to be saved

"Dude! Get away from her!" Adam ordered

_Thank you Jesus! _

"Clare was asking for it." K.C. stated

"No she wasn't I saw the whole thing…now unless you want a form filed for sexual assault, I suggest you leave her alone. Come on dude, there are other girls." Adam persuaded

K.C. huffed at the loss, and went inside his car only to slam his door hard, and speed away.

"Thanks." I replied

"Don't mention it. He's always like that, but used to girls falling for it, you're the first not to." Adam laughed

"Yeah, well is there any way I could thank you." I asked

"Well…if you could get me a date with Fiona Coyne…. Nah! Just kidding! Don't mention it, besides it's my obligation." He smiled

"Obligation for what?" I asked

"Well one: guys shouldn't treat girls like that, and two: Eli would kill me if I didn't do anything about it." He said sincerely

"What does Eli have to do with this?" I asked

"_**Everything**_. See you around." Adam smiled and walked away

Then on Thursday:

I was walking into the bathroom, to wash my hands, when suddenly Bianca, Jenna, and Julia entered. _**Déjà vu**_.

"Well, I see you came back." Julia harshly said with her arms crossing her chest

"Yeah." I answered, focusing on my hands

"So, is it true…you went to Kenya?" Bianca asked enthused

"Yes, I got a sister there."

"Interesting…" Julia replied

Then she bent down and whispered down my neck

"If you think middle school was bad…I've got something _special_ in store for you these years, if you **ever **mess with me." She giggled in a twisted manner

"Bring it." I shoved her as I walked past through her. She then hit the wall and looked frustrated.

I really didn't care, if Julia was going to fire back, I was going to shoot flames ten times harder and faster too.

The week went by slowly, and Friday then came, Alli was begging me to go to the park with her the next day, she wanted to go for a jog with me, since I told her I ran everyday in Kenya, she suddenly found me as an expert on running. It was good too since I was willing to fill my weekends with plans with friends, since guys didn't stop asking me out on dates, however I did not find any one of them interesting to my standards. I was sitting outside on the sidewalk, for no reason whatsoever, then Eli came back from his daily jog and sat next to me.

"_Huh-huh-huh_…Hey…Clare." He panted

"Tired?" I asked

"No, just an intense workout." He smiled

"Are you okay?" He asked

"Okay of what?"

"K.C., I heard what he tried to do…to you, Adam told me, sorry that he's such a neanderthal." He apologized

"Well that's in the past. And I'm okay." I replied

"Oh." He could only say

Then it was silent

"Why do you run every day? Is it your favorite thing to do?" I asked out of nowhere

"Hahaha…I love to run, but I do it to tone out for my soccer matches." He smirked

"Oh? You still play?"I asked

"Of course, you know how much I love soccer! As a matter in fact, I have a match tomorrow against Lakehurst." He smiled

"Really? That's good." I replied

"You…should uh, come tomorrow if you want. Last time I wanted you there…I screwed things over." He replied sadly

"It was both of our faults…I should have never come on to you like that. It's not your fault you didn't like me the way I **felt** about you." I sighed

"I can't come anyways…I have plans." I added

"No, I did like you Clare; I was just too…**stupid to admit it**. Besides…who do you have plans with?" I couldn't help but notice that he seemed jealous

"Alli, we're going for a jog in the park tomorrow." I replied with no eye contact

"Really? Well my match is in the park too, you should stop by if you feel like it, there will be refreshments, I'll buy you both water for you guys after you two exercise." He grinned

"I'll see." I smiled

He then cupped my face.

"Clare…I think we should talk about this…situation, some time." He asked

"What situation? Water?" I stupidly asked

"No…**my feelings and yours**…us." He stated smoothly

"There is no situation. I managed to move on, so can you **if** you really do like me..." I said

"Well, I do. Did you…really move on. Look at me. Did you?" He asked hopefully, as I stared into his emerald eyes, the same ones which made me fall in love with him from the moment, I saw him standing, and moving into his new home.

"I-I-I… think you're right, we should talk about this some other time." I got up and walked inside my house.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I was talking to Clare, to check if she was okay, after Adam told me that K.C. tried to force himself on Clare. When I found out, I snapped. I was going to punch him, the minute I saw him, but I know that Clare hated drama. We went from talking about soccer, to us. I want her so badly, more than anything, more than a million dollars. _**I need her**_. I can't look into those blue eyes and not kiss those luscious pink lips. I noticed she became awkward when I brought up the topic. She then left.

The next day I was at my match, when Drew came to see Adam play. They went to each others' games usually. I previously shot three goals, when I saw that Clare came with Alli, they were in casual shirts and shorts, Alli looked exhausted, while Clare looked pumped, something about that, was the sexiest thing I've ever seen. They sat down watching me play, when I looked over I then saw her staring at me and smiling, then a random blonde guy started speaking to her, _I had to gain back her attention_.

I then shot another goal, and the crowd went wild, Clare then was clapping and cheering me on, I felt invincible. We won. The defeat was an utter embarrassment to the other team. I then walked over to Clare, to only see that Alli had gone somewhere with Drew, and the boy was still speaking to Clare.

"So uhh, you know, you're really cute, girl. I'd like to take you out some time." He said

Clare looked annoyed.

"Well…you see I'm not allowed to date." She stated. I mentally laughed.

"So, what your parents don't know won't hurt them." He smiled and stepped in closer to her, she was getting uncomfortable, and I then stepped in.

"Sorry dude, I'm her brother…and my sister, doesn't seem interested." I stated as I pulled her in for a hug

"Really?" He looked skeptical

"Yeah, really. So unless you want to start something, I suggest you leave her alone." I stated as I pushed my face against his.

And with that, he left.

"You didn't have to." She blushed

"I wanted to. 'My parents don't let me date'?" I smirked

"Well, it's sort of true." She smiled

"Really, I recall Darcy having a boyfriend at the age of 12."

"Doesn't mean that they knew. I don't like to lie." She replied

"I like honest people." I smiled

We stood there staring at each other.

"…Great goal! You are really good! The shot was amazing…" She decided to break the silence.

I didn't notice but we were an inch away from each other.

"I dedicate it to you. All of them." I smirked foolishly

"I don't want to be greedy." She giggled

"Clare!" Alli yelled. _Way to go to ruin the moment_.

"I got to go." Clare said

"We still have a pending talk." I said

"I know…I'll know when the moment comes." She replied

"I hope it's soon." I said

I was at home, when Fitz called me, that there was a party at his house, I would go, but Clare was a house away from me on a beautiful, starry Saturday night she was thankfully left…alone, _gorgeous_, _**parents were gone**_, did I mention _alone_?

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**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

Tell me what you think…I came up with this in an hour. So if it sucks tell me. I'll update on Wednesday! P.S. You guys are so awesome. I have never written fanfiction before, and this all means a lot since this is my first time!...I'm going to go off now and cry ;)


	12. 10th Grade:Only Hope

Thank you for the reviews! Tell me what you guys think as always! :D

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

My eyes focused on the dry beige ceiling above me. I was bored out of my mind. I called Alli to come over, but she was in the 'process' of getting back Drew. My parents went to a Church retreat. I couldn't come along since it was a 'grown-ups-only' event. _I can be mature_. Anyways, I couldn't do anything, there was nothing good on TV, and I read all my books ten times at least. I was desperate. _I wonder what Eli's doing_. Snap out of it.

I then took a nap, when I heard my doorbell ring, it was seven at night. I went downstairs, and opened the door; low and behold there was Eli.

"What are you doing here?"

"Well, a hello would be better. But, if you must ask I came for that **talk**, I've been waiting for." He smirked

"The-the talk?" I stuttered. _Oh no_.

"Yes…unless there's something you're hiding." He whispered in an arrogant tone

"No, not at all."

I then stepped outside towards my porch.

"Let's go for a walk then." I offered

"Fine by me." He chuckled

We were walking around the neighborhood and came across the park, only to sit on an isolated bench, in the park, alone…at night. The air was warm yet refreshing comforted by soothing waves of the wind hitting on our skins. The grass was a dull forest green and the stars were out, shining brighter than ever.

"So what is this talk about?" I asked

"Don't act like you don't know."

Eli glared at me with such disappointment.

"Well I don't." I avoided eye contact. _I did know_.

"Well then, I'll start. How long have you liked me, before the…before you _left_." Eli stated

_Oh Jesus Christ! This is going to be torture!_

"Since…**the day I met you**." I answered sincerely, yet slightly embarrassed. _He must think I was a creep_.

He gave me an apologetic look.

"Really? You never liked any other boy, not in the third, fourth, sixth grade?"His voice lingered with hope that I did, because if it was true, it would prove how much pain he has caused me.

"Never. Eli, remember that one day in Ms. Crawford's class when Fitz yelled in front of the whole class, that I 'loved' you. Well, before then as well and **ever since**…until a year ago." I answered, part of me **lied**

"I thought, he was joking. I mean…we were seven." He said clueless

"Eli, my feelings were never a joke, no matter how stupid, small, young, or ugly I was, or still am." I could feel the tension arise

"Clare, you were never any of those things, not even today." He replied, with an assuage tone.

"Then why did you make fun of me when I was little, you don't remember calling me **ginger**, **cootie queen**, **four eyes**…" I choked on those words because it brought back the painful memories.

"Sadly, I do remember. But, I was stupid, even to this day. I was seven for crying out loud! I thought all girls had cooties." He yelled smoothly

"My turn." I simply said

"Of what?" He asked

"I get to ask a question now."

"Shoot." He sat back down on the bench, as if he was prepared for anything

"Did you…really mean…those entire things you said in the…_**letter**_?" I wanted,_** I need**_ to know.

Eli then grabbed both of my hands and squeezed them tightly, then stared deeply into my eyes. I could feel his hot breath crashing with my body.

"Clare, I'm not religious or anything, but I solemnly swear, may I die tomorrow or in the next minute if I'm lying. **I was saying the truth**. Sure, I didn't demonstrate it by rejecting you the way I did, but boy do I regret it every, fucking day. You're the only girl that gets me…..the only one that agrees with me that coke is overrated, and grape soda is the best. The only one that would offer an old lady to cross the street nowadays. The only girl that when I look at, my knees shake, like at this instant. The one who introduced me to half of my favorite books. Damn, this may be the most faggot thing I will ever say…but Clare, you are the only one that makes me crazy, and when I look at you, I can't help but smile and want to do a cartwheel in mid air. "He said proudly

I then pulled away.

"Eli…why didn't you tell me in the moment? Why now?" I was frustrated

"Because…I was **scared**. I mean to be sincere… not to be mean or anything, but I was expected to fall for a girl like Julia, not you. **Yet I did**. I was going to tell you my feelings the moment I saw you at my soccer game crying…I went to your house, but your mother told me you left, and didn't know when you were coming back."

"Oh." I could only say

I then got up and walked home, he then followed me along the way. I need to get away, _run away_. We then reached both of our houses.

Eli ran closer to me and yelled

"Clare! I just revealed my inner thoughts and feelings to you and…you dare to walk away?" He was pissed

"Eli…I just…_**can't**_." I started crying

"Why? What's the matter with you…and don't you dare come with that crap that you moved on. Because, I know you didn't, you still look at me the same way you did a year ago, with that freaking stare that desperately calls for me…just why Clare! Why! I'm not a problem that you could run away from like you did with going to Kenya, you have to face me." He yelled with a distressing tone

"I know." I stared at the ground

"I see, you still have that habit of crying and facing the ground." He said in a monotone

"Eli it's not you it's me." I sobbed

He then stepped in closer, and brought my face up to meet his, and wiped away my tears with his soft thumbs. Making my cheeks have contact with his black stoned ring.

"Why?" He asked in a comforting, more relaxed voice

"Because…I don't trust myself with you."

"Clare…you don't need to worry about that. I'll take care of you."

"Eli, I just need a new beginning." I sniffled

It was silent for a second which felt like forever

"Okay, I see." He said with a questioning look, and walked into his house.

For a moment I thought he got angry and left. Yet he stepped out a couple seconds later, only to approach me with a smile. _Has he gone mad?_ Eli then held out his hand and said

"Hello, my name is Eli Goldsworthy. I'm just moved her from another town." He smiled, waiting for me to shake his hand. _What is he doing?_

"What are you doing?" I asked confused

"Well…you said you wanted a new beginning. I'm giving it to you Clare. Let's start from the start, let me begin from square one. Forget everything. We will start fresh and I will not make any stupid mistakes. Okay?"

I was confused, yet pleased. _This was the sweetest thing, anyone has done for me_.

"Nice to meet you, Eli. My name is Clare. It seems to me that we are neighbors." I giggled and thought to play along. My tears had slowly vanished away.

"Well, Clare. Tell me about yourself." He smirked

I then spent the rest of the night talking with Eli. It was like we were twelve all over again. I felt so at ease with him. It was as if…he is my…_**soul mate**_. By the end of the night Eli told me something which made me believe in love all over again.

"I will do whatever it takes Clare…but someday, oh someday _**you will be mine**_, while **I am already yours**. That's a promise." He smiled and went home

He left me breathless with a melting heart. _**I already was his**_.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I realized that the reason why Clare was trying to avoid both her feelings and I was because she was scared. She got out of all her problems, only not wanting to return to any of them. But, I was going to change that. I was going to be the most romantic sap, known to mankind. The sweetest prince charming having existed in fairytales. The fiercest knight in shining armor known to fair princesses. I was going to win Clare Edwards' heart, if it's the last thing I do in this pathetic lifetime.

The next day, I didn't see Clare. She was at church. I just went to the dot to hang out with Adam. We were having fun until Julia stepped in with her new boyfriend. Did I mention he's in college?

"Hi Adam! Eli!" She said in the bitchiest tone ever. She then grabbed her boyfriend towards us.

"'Sup." Kyle said

"Hey." Adam and I replied

"So, what are you two up to?" Julia asked

"Nothing, just chilling." Adam said

"Oh, well Kyle and I just came for some coffee. Kyle you should go order." _Kyle is whipped_.

Adam and I laughed to notice how Julia had the poor guy on a leash.

"I got to go to the bathroom man." Adam said and left

"So…how are things Eli?" Julia asked

"Good."I replied.

I looked away, she then had the damn nerve to move her hand towards mine and rub it softly.

"Really? …. 'Cause I miss you. Eli, **I need you**." She begged

"Julia…we've talked about this before. The answer isn't going to change." I rejected her, and swiped my hand away from hers.

"Come on…_don't you miss my kisses_?" She breathed down my neck, trying to seduce me, yet fail.

"Not at all. You should probably give them to your boyfriend." I said angry

Then Adam came out of the bathroom, and I signaled him that it was time for us to leave.

The next day at school, I avoided Julia. I then saw that Clare was struggling with her books in her locker, it was the cutest thing I had ever seen.

"Here, let me help." I grabbed three of her books.

"Thanks."

"So where to?" I asked

"Nowhere, I was just organizing my locker, it's really…messy." She said

"Oh, well in that case I think your pencil case would be better on the shelf." I added and moved it for her

"It does look better." She seemed surprised

"What? I can't be organized?" I said sarcastically

"No…it's just that this comes from the boy that cleans his room once a month." She giggled

"How do you know that? Have you been spying on me?"I said in conceited tone

"Well, piles of clothes and pizza boxes aren't exactly a great view from my bedroom window to avoid." She shot back

"So…you do spy on me?"

The bell then rang

"I got to go." She smiled

"Where's your class?" I asked planning to walk her to it

"It's right here actually." She said, pointing at the door across the hall.

"See you then." I smirked

After school, I was driving home only to see a beautiful someone walking home, Clare. I pulled up next to her, and got out of my car.

"Do you care for a ride?" I asked in the nicest voice I could

"A hearse? What did I miss?" She grinned

"You haven't seen it? You live right next door to me."

"No, I've never…really thought to troll across your lawn, purposely looking for a hearse." She replied. _Feisty…I like it_.

"Well, do you want the ride or not." I said

"Sure. Thanks." She said

I then opened the door for her and went back into my car, driving her home.

"Thanks, Eli…it's very sweet of you." She smiled with those pink lips I dearly wanted to kiss

"So…Clare, you probably hear this a lot. Do you have any plans Saturday night?" I asked hopefully

"No…why?" She seemed anxious

"Well, I know a cool guy who really wants to take this beautiful, nice, sweet, smart, blue eyed girl out." I looked at her

She fidgeted with her watch and bit her lip nervously.

"I'm sorry, I can't." She said in a cheerless voice

I was heartbroken and in denial. Not to be cocky, but I was **never rejected**.

"May I ask why?" I said sorrowfully

"I do want to go Eli, but..."

"But what? You can tell me Clare."

"Remember that I told you, my parents don't let me date."

_**Duh!**_

"Oh. I see." I said, on the inside I was happy though that she didn't reject me.

"Sorry about that, but I don't like to lie to them." She said with an remorseful face

"Don't worry about it…I understand." I smiled reassuring her that it was okay.

_**I know, just what I am going to do**_.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I wanted so much, to go on a date with Eli…but my parents. I was at home polishing the furniture upstairs the next day in the afternoon, when my father and mother called me to come downstairs.

"Yes?" I answered

"This boy, I'm sorry what's your name again son? Eli?" My father asked motioning to Eli, who was sitting in my living room! Next to my mother!

"Yes, sir." Eli replied

"Well, Eli here says he wants to take you out on a date, but is here for our permission." My father replied

"Randall, I think we should let her. I mean, after all, this is the first boy who comes to ask one of our daughters on a date. Besides, his mother and I speak, she is a nice woman." My mother reasoned

"_Well, they've got to grow up sometime_… Eli is a nice gentleman, and I suppose he will behave like one with you." My father gave Eli a look which said 'you-hurt-my-daughter-and-I-will-castrate-you.'

"Of course sir. Clare deserves the finest respect and loyalty." Eli replied with a strong confidence

"It's up to you now Clare. Let's leave these two kids alone, Helen." My father went with my mother inside the kitchen

"Let's go outside." I smiled

We were sitting on the sidewalk

"I can't believe you came to ask for my parents' permission!" I screamed in a joyous and pleased manner

"Well, what do you say about that date?" He asked optimistically

"Of course! Yes!" I screamed a tad bit too eager

"I'm glad you're excited as I am. I promise Clare, you'll have a good time." He smiled

"I don't have to worry about that, as long as you are there." I whispered

"Same here." Eli said

He then kissed my cheek

I gave him a questioning, yet blissful look.

"Sorry, I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable." He bowed his head down

I then kissed his cheek too. He turned pink.

"Not at all. See you Saturday." I giggled

"…See you..." He sighed

He seemed breathless.

* * *

I'LL UPDATE TOMORROW! :)


	13. 10th Grade: A Night To Remember

I made this chapter for the next three days! I won't update until Sunday or Monday since it's the holidays! Thank you for the reviews! I ADORE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I couldn't wait for my date with Clare. To be honest, I've never been so excited or nervous for any other girl in my past. _**It had to be perfect**_. The week went by slowly. It felt like an eternity. Eventually, Fitz and K.C. found out I had a thing for Clare. They weren't happy, but they managed to move on. As always, they got a hold of some cheap skank, and did their usual routine with them and go on to the next one. They never took any girl seriously sadly. Adam was helping me plan the epic date on Friday night at my house.

"So, where to, what time, what attire, how?" Adam asked

He always was the romantic one in our group. That's how he scored Fiona Coyne.

"Well, seven at night. I'm going to wear my black leather jacket with black jeans, and I will use my previous experience with girls for this date." I said

"Dude…I feel really…like a fag…talking to you about this stuff. We never talk about this stuff!" Adam whined

"Well, **Clare's different**. And you're the romantic one machismo, so help me out." I glared at him

"Okay, okay. You forgot one detail. Where are you taking her? Don't tell me the mall or the dot…they are so overrated." Adam said

"I know. I was thinking…" Adam interrupted

"Don't say the steakhouse…that place is so unromantic! Besides it smells like rotten meat in there!" Adam reasoned

"Oh man! Where do I take her now?" I worried

"True…I got it!" Adam said

"What?"

"Take her out for a basket dinner in the park!" Adam screamed excitedly

"The basket dinner I'll go with. The park not so sure. Clare and I always go there, I need something different."

We stood there thinking and thinking….when I realized a place I had driven by in the past. I believe it's something Clare would love.

"I know where." I said to Adam

"Where?"

"It's in an abandoned church, not too far from here, she's like religious and it's isolated…it's perfect." I sighed at my sudden revelation

"There's an abandoned church in this town?" Adam wondered

"Yeah, it's in the downtown part area. Behind the mini market."

"What a romantic view." Adam said sarcastically

"It's better on the inside, besides it's the thought that counts. Right?"

"Right. I got to go now, man. Fiona just texted me that she wants to 'spend the night'." Adam chuckled

"Am I the only virgin in our group?" I asked jokingly

"Guess so…unless that one time with Julia in the back of your car counts." Adam added

"Gross. We just went to third base." I said nonchalantly

"Third base, naked." Adam laughed

I then threw a pillow at him and he left.

I was the only virgin in my group. The only reason why I didn't get made fun of it was because I was hypothetically **the leader**. I didn't mind being one. I have seen a girl naked before. Actually, while Clare was gone, Jasmine Fields came to my house once and threw herself at me out of nowhere. So make those two girls I've seen naked. I however, didn't feel 'attracted' enough to want any girl in that sort of way. Everyone knew I could have any girl in Degrassi at the snap of my finger, every guy's fantasy, yet I didn't want just any girl. I wanted…someone **special**. Someone like Clare.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

It was Saturday in the afternoon; I hadn't seen Eli the entire day, since he was at his soccer match. I needed desperate help. I wanted to be perfect for this date. _**It was my first**_. I had no idea what to do in a date. K.C did not count, since it was in a school sanction event. I was nervous out of my mind. That's why I called Alli to come over the entire day to help me.

"So what are you going to wear?" Alli said curiously

"Well, I'm going for a formal yet casual look, since I do not know where he is taking me." I sighed

"He's probably taking you to the Dot or the mall. Eli **always** takes his dates there." Alli replied assuring

"How many dates has Eli ever been on, with different girls? I mean you were part of his group once."

"I would have to say maybe in the range of ten through fifteen. Just a guesstimate, maybe more." Alli smiled

Remember how I said I was nervous out of my mind? **I was now hyperventilating a profound anxiety**.

"Fifteen! Oh my! Alli…I can't do this. I'm so boring…so plain!" I whined

"Clare…calm down! Just go with the flow, I'll teach everything I know. Relax." Alli ran her fingers through my hair comforting me.

"Okay**. I trust you**."

Alli gave me useful tips on what to do on a date for example: how to help the boy pay for the dinner, not to give mixed signals, never to agree to something I'm uncomfortable with, and to act like a lady always. Alli picked my outfit out for me of course, and put on some of my makeup for me. She was planning to sleep over so I could give her the details, meanwhile she was going over Drew's house, and come back later, the same time I would from my date.

It was seven on the dot alright, and the doorbell rang. My palms were sweaty, my throat was tightening, my knees were shaking, and I had the sudden need to pee.

"Eeek! Oh my gosh! Clare, you have to tell me everything when you come back!" Alli squealed like a five year old

"That is if I could move to the front door." I was paralyzed

"Relax." Alli squealed and pushed me down the stairs

"Have a good time sweetie. Be back by eleven." My mother sighed

I walked downstairs to see Eli, **he looked really handsome**. I'm not sure if it was that sparkle in his eye, or the comforting smirk he gave me.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I walked to Clare's house and waited for her to come out. Mr. Edwards answered the door.

"Listen son, that's my baby girl you're taking out. I better not see a tear in her eye ever from you. Got it? Have her home by eleven." He whispered

"You don't have to say a word. I know." I smiled

Mr. Edwards smiled as well and patted me on the shoulder and walked back to his living room to have his eyes glued to the television.

Then Clare came walking down the stairs. She looked like an angel. Her eyes looked bluer than ever, she was wearing a beautiful dress which hugged her curves perfectly. Her smile was breathtaking, with those soft, glossy pink lips. Her auburn cinnamon curls were bouncing with each step she took. I couldn't help but smile like a goofball.

"Ready?" I asked

She simply nodded and out we went. I opened the passenger's door for her in the hearse, and we drove to our destination.

The drive was quiet. I think it was because we were both nervous. I could tell she was, the girl wouldn't stop fidgeting with her hands. I just tapped my foot the whole entire way and had sweaty hands.

"So…where are we going? The Dot, the mall?" She asked shyly

"No…why do say those places?" I reply with my eyes on the road

"Well, that's where you usually take your dates, don't you?" She answered sweetly

_Adam was right. Those places are overrated. _

"That is true, but Clare, you're **special**. So, you deserve the **special** treatment." I laughed

She blushed. "Where are we going then?" She asked

"It's a surprise." I smiled

We then arrived to the abandoned church, I went to the back of my trunk and pulled out a basket full of food. She seemed scared, as if I was going to rape her in this abandoned place. I noticed it right away.

"It's a lot more beautiful inside, don't worry." I smiled and grabbed her hand.

I opened the gate and led her in. I had installed some lights the night before, and the place was glowing.

"Eli…is this place a church? It's so beautiful!" She gasped in awe

"It's abandoned. You know I'm not religious or anything, but this place reminded me of you." I smiled

We walked over to the inside of the church, and I had a table set there as well with some chairs. I placed the food down.

"Did you cook this?" She asked surprised

"No…me cook? You've got to be kidding. I ordered this food from the steakhouse." I chuckled

"You really went through all this trouble…**for me**?" She seemed thankful

"Of course! You're worth much more too, Clare."

We ate our food, and spent the night talking away of our interests, school, movies, books, **everything**. It was nine at night already and we spent the last hour talking. When I was with Clare…it felt, **perfect**. It had been perfect ever since I met her I was too blind to see it. But time and change is what opened my eyes to see the **true beauty inside Clare** all along, and now **outside as well**. I then walked over to her and squeezed her arm tightly and said

"Clare, I like you a lot. More than any girl I've ever met. This is the best date I ever had, and we aren't even through it yet. I just want to say if…you want to be my…_Sigh_. I never really ask these things straight forward, I guess what I'm trying to say is." I rambled only for Clare to interrupt me.

"_**Girlfriend**_?" She said

"Yes."

"Yes." She replied too

I then stared down into her deep crystal eyes, and I gazed from her eyes to her lips.

"Last time, it was your turn, now it's mine." I whispered

I then kissed her with the biggest passion I had inside of me. Our lips collided and massaged one another's with unison. My hand traveled down her waist and squeezed it gently. She wrapped her arms around my neck tightly with great infatuation and tenderness. The kiss was actually pretty elongated, but it felt like micro seconds. While I was kissing her, my mind forgot everything, and focused on her only. It was as if we were the last boy and girl on earth.

She broke away from the kiss and blushed

"What's wrong, did I make you feel uncomfortable." I asked worried

"No, it's just that…this was my _first_ _**real**_ kiss. And this is my _first_ date. And you were my _first_ crush, the _first_ to break my heart and heal it, **and** you are my _first_ boyfriend." She giggled heartedly

In that moment I knew…_**I love Clare Diane Edwards**_. I do. I want to say it, but I can't it's too soon. I'm in love with her. And I'm the luckiest boy in the world.

I kissed her forehead and whispered.

"I really do hope I'm the last as well."

"You're the sweetest boy I've ever met _**Elijah Goldsworthy**_." She smiled

I really hate it when people call me Elijah, you guys know how much too. But Clare, can call me Elijah all she wants, because it sounds so sweet and cute out of her mouth. While out of others, it sounds nasty and annoying.

"And you're the smartest, sweetest, most beautiful girl ever, Clare Diane Edwards."

We stood there cuddling the rest of the date. Then it was time for me to take her home. I stole from her a charming chaste kiss from her after I dropped her off at her porch, and went home a happy boy. I felt like flying or screaming out loud 'I'm Clare Edwards' boyfriend! Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha!'.


	14. 10th Grade: Forgive The Urgency

I am so sorry for taking forever to update but my comp. got viruses like I anticipated so. I had to get my computer fix! Pity me! :(

I'll update tomorrow though. **Sorry that this is rushed **but I had to work quickly on a chapter so you guys wouldn't have to wait any longer! ;( I think this is the most suckish chapter so far :P The next one shall be better!

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I walked inside my own home feeling like a new person. I couldn't help but feel so giddy I felt like dancing around, kicking my legs, and waving my hands up high in the air, and squeal like Alli would. My father and mother were asleep on the couch with the television turned on; I quietly put a blanket and pillow over them and turned off the lights. I walked upstairs and waited for Alli to arrive from Drew's house. My bedroom window was knocked and I saw her climb across the trees towards my balcony; I also noticed Drew and Adam driving away in black truck.

"Get in." I hissed

Alli climbed into my room and smoothed out her skirt.

"Do you have any idea what time it is?" I scowled at her bothered

"So… I came a little late, sorry _mom_." She giggled

"No, I was just worried…" I muttered

"I'm fine when I am with Drew. By the way…You have got to tell me how your date went!" Alli squealed as she dressed in her P.J.'s

I smiled broadly and blushed. I slipped out of my dress and into my night gown, I looked across my window towards Eli's and grinned, _his lights were still on_.

"It was amazing." I sighed foolishly

"Sounds like it. I need every single detail…like now!"

"No interruptions, after I'm done speaking then. Got it?" I gave her a questioning look

"My lips are sealed."Alli zipped her mouth

"Well, he took me to an abandoned church…" I then explained bit by bit the most magical night of my life as Alli glued her full attention towards me. Her eyes emotionally expressed such awe, confusion, laughter, happiness, and fulfillment,

"Wow! Was the kiss good?" She squealed

"_**Really**_ good."

"Was there tongue?" She whispered

"Alli! No…it was my first kiss by the way, I can't just give tongue!" I was embarrassed

"See…I told you that you and Eli would be together someday and you didn't believe me!"

Then I hit realization.

"I still don't. What am I going to do! I'm his girlfriend…" I was worried

I'm freaking Elijah Goldsworthy's a.k.a. the school's smartest male student, the town's esteemed athlete, Mr. Popularity, heartthrob, _**PERFECT GUY'S girlfriend**_.

"You're right! I mean…Eli is like a **god** at our school. I mean with people like Julia in the way…who knows what can happen? Clare…I need to **prepare you**. Take it from my personal experience, those people are piranhas and will eat you alive if you don't live up to their expectations. I couldn't handle all the pressure and broke up with Drew because of it. I wouldn't want you and Eli to go down that road…it's really painful and messy." Alli gasped

"But…I **love** him." My eyed bulged out at realizing to what I just said. _**Love?**_

"Clare? Do you mean 'love' like you 'love' candy…or 'love-love' like the real thing?" Alli was intrigued

"I don't know! What if it's some stupid thing like in those teenage movies?"

"Well…what do you feel?"

"It's hard to explain. I think…I need time to figure it out before I jump to conclusions." I rubbed the back of my head.

"Yeah, just don't over think it more than what it actually is…It's two in the morning, we should go to sleep." Alli whispered

I couldn't sleep the entire night. At first I was happy, now I'm scared. _**What did I get myself into?**_

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

It was Sunday and last night I slept like a baby, my body felt really warm and relaxed after the best date I ever had. I decided to text Clare and ask her if she wanted to go to the dot for some coffee,

_Want to go to the dot for coffee. ;)_

_-Eli_

_Sure…meet you outside in 10? :)_

_-Clare_

_Cool._

_-Eli_

She stepped out of her house in a navy button down dress. I waited for her and put my arms around her waist in which she was utterly surprised.

"Whoa…where did that come from?" She giggled

"Can't I show you my affection physically?"

"Of course you can…but I'm new to all this relationship stuff."

"Then you'll be my student and I will be your teacher, got it?"

She replied with a soft smile and a kiss to my cheek, we went walking down the streets holding hands with her head brushing against my shoulder, from where I was standing she looked like an angel with the sun shining on her face and the wind swiftly pounding through her curls. She was giddy like a little girl which I found adorable and pulled my hand into the dot, which to my dismay Julia was there with Fitz.

"Let's sit over there in the corner." I offered and dragged her towards there

"Oh, okay."

We sat down and looked at the menus.

"What do want? Get anything you like."

"I'm just thirsty, so I'll just get some orange juice."

"You sure? You could get some ch-"I was interrupted

I felt a slight tap on my shoulder. It was Julia and Fitz was near _**my**_ Clare.

"Eli. Clare? Are you two like on a date?" She hissed as she looked into my eyes, her eyes were dilated with jealousy.

I grabbed Clare's hands and rubbed my index thumbs back and forth with her fingers.

"I guess you could say that." I smiled

"What you two are like an item now?" Fitz snarled

"Yeah. We are. Is something wrong?" I snapped at the both of them, Clare looked uncomfortable and tapped her foot nervously against the floor.

"Really? Ughh, I see." Julia seemed pissed

"Can I talk to you for a second, Eli?" She added

"I don't see why you can tell me in front of my…girlfriend." I smirked

"Eli…it's okay, I'll wait." Clare smiled. _Wow, I just love her even more now_.

I nodded in response and went to go speak with Julia outside.

"Eli…what the fuck?" She spat

"What's your damn problem?"

"_**Her**_, I broke up with Kyle, for you!" She started crying. _**Man, she was asking for a punch in the nose**_.

"Julia! I never led you on. I'm with her now so move on, there's a bunch of other guys." I replied and walked back inside only to find Fitz a tad bit too close to Clare as she squirmed and looked bothered.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

As Eli left to go speak with Julia, I thought Fitz would go away, but he didn't as soon as Eli left he stared at me with a perverted grin.

"_So_…**if** Eli leaves you for Julia…you and I could have our own little fun. What do you say? I'm willing to take things slow for you." He grinned as he rubbed my purity ring. I was entirely disgusted

I jerked away "You should go, n-now." I was creeped out.

"Come on, _you know_…you're the hottest girl in school. You shouldn't have to settle for one guy. Besides Eli is the least manly for a _complete woman like you_. He doesn't have to know." He whispered huskily down my neck

"Please, get away from me. I would never cheat on Eli or have anything to do with you." I simply pushed him away only for him to lean down. _Crap!_

"What the hell are you doing Fitz?" Eli pushed him away from me and I ran behind him

"Nothing, man. If I were you I wouldn't leave such a beautiful girl unattended." He chuckled and walked away

Eli looked beyond furious.

"Come on. Let's go." He snapped and we left

The walk was awkward. He was really quiet and he had his arm around me the entire way. His grip was strong and firm. _Was he angry at me?_ We reached a stop at an isolated part of the park near the forest.

"Eli…are-are y-you mad at me?" I whispered sadly.

He let out a frantic sigh and leaned down and kissed me hungrily His tongue forced inside my mouth, and his hands grabbed tightly around my waist as he moved his hands back and forth. I felt…uncomfortable. _This wasn't Eli_.

"Eli…what was that?" I gasped and looked away.

"I'm sorry, I just…Clare, what did Fitz tell you?" Eli rubbed his neck looking ashamed

"Nothing, really." I was a nervous wreck

"Did he hit on you, please be honest." He glared at me

"Yes…but I don't like Fitz, I despise him!" I begged

"It's okay, I just want to make it clear, that you're mine." He whispered and pulled me in for a tight hug

I was so flattered by his comment and kissed him on his lips softly.

"I am, don't worry…just, take things slow with me, okay?" I asked

"Anything for you. Sorry we didn't get your orange juice, are you still thirsty?"

"Not anymore." I smirked

I then wrapped my arms around his neck as he flashed me that famous smirk, and leaned down.

"I'll take things slow okay?" He said

"Actually, I think we should progress a bit more." I smiled and his eyes bulged out of his face.

"If you say so."

He cupped my face and sucked on my bottom lip. I ran my hands through his hair as he swiftly grazed his tongue against mine. I chewed on his upper lip as we rotated back and forth.

"It wasn't too fast for you? Right?" He was worried

"Eli…it's too slow." I giggled

"Patience is a virtue." He smirked as he held my hand and said "Clare, you're amazing."

"You're even more."

"Ready to walk down the halls as my girlfriend tomorrow." He whispered down my neck

"Would you laugh if I say that I'm scared?"

"I would be too, but I'll protect you." He stammered

Inside of me I knew deep down, there were problems and obstacles ahead for us.


	15. 10th Grade: Tension Arises

**Eli's P.O.V.**

It was Monday morning and I was dearly excited to show off my new arm candy around school. Clare is mine. I'm just… **so fulfilled**. I hope everything will go smoothly. However, deep down my stomach has a nauseating feeling that something is going to happen, I don't know if it's good or bad. I hope it's good.

I was planning to take Clare to school, as I grabbed an apple and chewed it down, I waited for her outside.

"Good morning Elijah." She smiled. I love the sound of her voice when she purrs my name.

"Hey, you ready?"

"Yeah…I just forgot my keys!" She realized and skipped into her house.

"Momma Edwards is busy tonight with Daddy?" I playfully said

"Church stuff." She smiled and raced towards my car

As we went driving to school a conversation began.

"You busy today after school?" I asked

"Depends…"

"Depends on what?"

"Depends if I have a lot of homework or not."

_Are you serious?_

She noticed my disappointed look and replied "School's first okay, then you."

"It's cool; I just want you to come over."

"Over? As in your house?" She was surprised, she should be, and you see, even though Clare and I have lived next door to each other our whole lives basically, she's never been inside my house, as far as the living room.

"Yeah, my mom is going to some bachelorette party, and my dad's off at work, the guys are busy too…so I was wondering if you could keep me company."

"Well…I'll see if I can." She smiled and looked away.

I stared at her attentively as I drove and noticed that she was blushing.

"Do I make you **that** nervous?" I chuckled

"I think it's something that will never go away." She sighed

We stopped as I parked into the school entrance.

"You make me nervous too." I smiled

"Eli?"

"Hmm?"

"Kiss me."

I was happy she asked and I leaned down and brushed her lips swiftly with mine. Our tongues twirled and pushed each other softly as I cupped her waist and she hugged my chest.

"Ready for school?" I asked

"Do I really have a choice?" she giggled

"Well…we have first period together, I'll walk you to you second." I smiled

"Okay."

We got out of the car and I pulled her in tightly as my arm wrapped her waist and hers around my back. We walked down the hall with whispers and glares. Some of them which had bothered me and made Clare feel uncomfortable.

'_Oh my god! Is that Eli and Clare?'_

'_I thought him and Julia were still dating'_

'_That __**skank**__ got a hold of him?'_

'_Why can't I be her?'_

'_Man! Eli got a fine ass!'_

'_Get some!'_

"Ignore them." I muttered

"I'm trying."

_Bring!_

Clare and I walked to class, I hated sitting far away from her. I was annoyed seeing a crowd of girls gathering around Clare's desk asking about our relationship. Clare simply replied one worded answers which drove them away.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

'_So are you and Eli together?'_

'_When, Where, How?'_

'_Is he a good kisser?'_

"Yes"

"I don't know."

"What?"

I was dying on the inside. I didn't know dating Eli would be such a big deal. I felt so out of place. _Maybe this is what Alli was talking about._

After class, Eli insisted on walking me to my second period, but that would mean he would be late for his so I denied nicely. It was during lunch when things took a **drastic** toll. I was planning to meet Eli at the back of the school, as I waited Julia appeared out of nowhere, along with her 'posse': Jenna and Bianca.

"Edwards!" Julia snapped as I turned around

I realized, we were four girls alone. **Three against one**.

"What do you want?"

"Stay away from Eli." She said coldly

"Eli isn't an object."

She took a step closer "You're wrong there…I'm warning you."

Jenna and Bianca backed away as I knew what was going down.

I was willing to defend myself "Make me." I spat

"Hold my earrings Bianca." Julia ordered as she stepped slowly towards me

_**SLAP!**_

"This is between me and you only the." I sighed as I rubbed my swollen cheek, Jenna and Bianca backed away and slowly watched the fight.

I was for a short time distracted by the shouts that originated from the growing crowd in the back of the school. Catcalls were followed by cheers of encouragement so loud that my attention was shortly called away from the fight. Julia's leg swept out in a wide motion, connecting with my ankles, throwing me off balance. Without even realizing what exactly was happening, I found myself flat on my back, sucking in deep breaths of air that seemed empty of oxygen. I shot back up and punched her straight in her nose. I soon heard Eli's voice into the crowd. Soon enough, Mr. Simpson arrived along with Coach Armstrong as they pulled us away.

"You slut!" Julia gasped as she rubbed her newly broken nose.

I simply ignored her comment; I wasn't going to get into much more trouble than I already am in.

I arrived into the main office as Julia was being attended in the nurse's office.

My father and mother rushed in to the office and that's when the questions began.

Simpson sat in his leather chair and sighed "Ms. Edwards, I must say, I did not expect this behavior from an honorary student like you."

"Clare, I agree…who started it?" my father asked

"Julia came to me…but I had a part in starting the fight, I encouraged her."

"Ms. Edwards, what did this fight concern towards?" Simpson was interested

I could say Eli…but my parents would forbid me to date him, but I couldn't lie and have it blow up in my face ten times harder than it would now.

"Well, Julia dated Elijah Goldsworthy before I did… right now. She is paranoid about him, and threatened me to stay away from him, when I simply denied she threatened me and I…'defended' myself." I muttered

My mother look disappointed as she bowed her head down with her arms crossed. My father…if I'm mistaken, looked…_proud_?

"Well Ms. Edwards, such behavior is not tolerated on campus. You and Ms. Basinet shall be suspended for the rest of the week. Do you have a friend who may take your assignments to you?" Simpson asked

"My friend Alli could, I guess."

"Well, you may go home now."

I walked down the halls accompanied by my mother and father, I ran into Julia and her parents.

"We're terribly sorry for what had occurred." Julia's mother begged to my parents, it was as if they knew it was her fault. Julia looked beyond pissed as she held a cloth to her _swollen, big, ugly nose_.

"_Girls_." My father simply stated as he rolled his eyes

"Yes, thank you, but forgiveness is always the first step." My mother cooed. _Her and her religion._

"Well, we hope your daughter recovers…Jules can be a bit possessive." Julia's father agreed and walked away, Julia shot a death glare at me while I smoothly smirked.

As we got into the car, the ride was silent and the tension felt awkward. My father felt it too.

"What do you say if we go to the fundraiser tonight…as a family?" He asked my mother

"Randall! Our father just got suspended and you talk about celebrating?" My mother gasped

"A girl with parents like that, apologizing for their daughter, know she started it. Clare-Bear simply defended herself, Helen…we both know our daughter isn't violent, we didn't raise her in those circumstances." My father defended

We reached home as my mother simply scoffed

"Clare, you're grounded. No going out or dating for a month!" My mother said as she rushed into her room

I walked towards my father and asked "Does this mean…I'm not allowed to date Eli?"

My father let out a small chuckle "If you: _my_ baby girl, an innocent good girl, is willing to fight for him….he must be _**some**_ boy."

I hugged him tightly and whispered "Thanks."

"I agree with your mother though, no dating for at least a…week." He smiled and walked into the room to speak with my mother.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I was planning to meet Clare at lunch but went to the bathroom first, when all of a sudden I heard Fitz yelling "Catfight! Back of the school!"

_But wait, Clare is waiting for me at the back of the school. __**Shit**__._

I rushed immediately and found Clare and Julia tugging and pulling each other. Julia knocked Clare to the ground. _I was going to kill her_. Then something least expected happened, Clare shot back up and punched Julia in the nose. I tried my best to get through the crowd, however it was too late, Simpson and Coach Armstrong arrived.

"Everybody go to class!" Coach Armstrong yelled

"Damn! Who knew your girl could fight!" K.C. chuckled

I shoved him and made my way to class, I wanted to go see if Clare was okay, but Julia would be around her so I didn't want to risk it.

"Psss!" Adam whispered from his seat.

I quietly made my way over there as the teacher was distracted.

"Bianca texted me, Julia started it because you're dating Clare."

"Is she crazy?" I asked to Adam, He nodded in response

"If Clare's parents find out it was because of you, they won't want you dating Clare." Adam sighed

Crap…he's right. I can't lose Clare.

I simply groaned and went back to my seat, the entire period I was thinking about Clare, and afterschool as well. Whenever I saw something blue, Clare came to mind. You could imagine how hard it was for me, considering I'm from a school where the colors are yellow and **blue**.

I went home and looked through my bedroom window, Clare was in her room, she was doing chores. I opened my window and played my music loudly to get her attention, she approached her window and looked at me embarrassed.

"You okay? If she left one scratch on you, I 'm going to…" I snarled

"Eli! No more violence. I'm okay. I just got suspended for the rest of the week and grounded as well."

"Clare…what about us? Your parents probably hate me." I groaned

"They don't…we can still be together." She smiled

"**I need to be with you**. Can you come outside?"

"I'm grounded…but, _I want to be near you too_."

"Well, I'm home alone." I offered suggestively

"Elijah Goldsworthy? Are you offering I sneak out?"

"You won't be a mile away from your house…technically it's as far to your living room." I smirked

"I'll come over then…later."She whispered seductively as she closed her window and went back to her own business.

I needed to know if she was okay, and I wanted to comfort her in the best way possible. It infuriated me to know that someone dare put a hand on **my Clare**. I wanted to make her forgive me for dragging her into all this drama. I was going to treat her like a queen, because I'm determined to make sure that nobody, not Julia, Fitz, her parents, or drama separate us, because, **Clare is mine**.

* * *

I'll update on Monday!


	16. 10th Grade: Drifting Away

**Clare's P.O.V.**

Deep down, I didn't want to sneak out; I do not like to lie to my parents. My dad was awfully generous with punishing for only a week. However, It's been two days that Eli and I had became a couple, and I felt that I didn't spend enough time with him, each time we manage to be alone, someone has to come in the way and ruin it. And when we do succeed, we can't 'let loose' and have our own fun because either we have school or my stupid curfew. I went downstairs to find my mother.

"Mom, I already plashed all the furniture, I cleaned the bathrooms, and passed the vacuum."

"Good." She scoffed as she focused on the bills piled on the kitchen table.

"Is there anything else before I could start on my homework, Alli e-mailed it to me." I lied

"No, tomorrow I'll give you more chores. No television for you tonight, I want you to do your homework and go to bed. I left some chicken for you on the counter, if you're hungry serve yourself some, I have to go to the market and buy more groceries, your father got a call from the office, he'll be back later on at night. Take care sweetie." She smiled and went out the door

_**Perfect**_.

I quickly took a shower and blow dried my hair, it was six in the afternoon. I slowly went out the door and left my bedroom window open, so I could come back easily. I rang the doorbell at Eli's house.

"You know for sneaking out, you suck at it. Ringing my doorbell? I expected a grand entrance through my bedroom window." He laughed as I playfull slapped him

"My mom and dad are out, this was easier, besides it's my first time." I smiled

"And not the last I hope. Come on in." He smirked

I walked inside his house, the first time since the third grade when I only went to his living room and mercissely begged him to play dolls with me. His house was normal and pretty fancy if I may say so.

"Welcome to my simple abode." Eli whispered as he wrapped one of his arms around my neck

"So…what are we going to do?" I asked.

"Well, we could _talk_. Enjoy that alone time we've **both wanted**. I just want to know…what happened today…with the fight?"

I sighed. Then the phone rang.

"Hold that thought. Go upstairs to my room; it's the second door to the right." He smiled and went to answer his phone.

I walked in and it looked better than from the view of my bedroom window. It was black with band posters everywhere, he had a double bed which was cloaked by plain black sheets. This definitely was an 'Eli' room. I made my way to his desk and sat on his chair, I feel…uncomfortable sitting on his bed.

**

* * *

**

**Eli's P.O.V.**

Clare went upstairs to my room while I answered the phone, it was my mother checking if I was doing fine. Of course I am, when I have the most gorgeous girl upstairs in my bedroom_. Wait, that came out wrong_.

I rushed upstairs and found Clare sitting on my desk chair with her legs crossed and her hands as well, she looked very attractive in that pose.

"So do you want something to drink? Are you hungry?" I offered

"I'm good, I just had dinner." She smiled

I sat on my bed and told her "Come here." As I tapped the empty space next to me. She blushed and slowly made her way over.

"I'm not going to do anything to you Clare, unless you want me to?" I assured her

"No it's just that…I've never been in a boy's room before." She said as she fidgeted with her fingers

"Man, you're the most innocent person I've ever met. I wouldn't do anything to hurt you or make you feel uncomfortable, you know that, right?"

She nodded and rested her head on my shoulder as I kissed her fore head, I started patting her hand and saw that her cheek was slightly bruised.

"Did Julia do that to you today?" I asked

"Yeah, but it's not as bad as her broken nose." She giggled

I gradually moved my hand towards her cheek and rubbed it, "She's going to have to pay for that one." I growled, it made me angry to know that someone would put a hand on her.

"Eli…let it go. It's done. Please." She begged

"Okay, I'll call off the dogs. Why did she fight you though?" I asked again

"Why else. She's mad that I'm dating you…" Clare slowly pulled apart from me and looked into my eyes. "Eli, if you still like her…then you could go be with her, I don't want to come between anything." She sighed

"Clare…are you crazy! I lo-like you and Julia is in the past, sure I had some good times with her, but I'm over that and you…you make me so much happier." I almost said love but did'nt

"I just…I don't feel like I'm your type."

"You are." I smiled as my face inched closer to hers, her lips were slightly parted, then our lips were touching, at first the kiss was slow and then the kiss deepened into a more intense style. Surprisingly, it was Clare, not me who took the kiss to a next level, she moved her tongue swiftly along my bottom lip, until her lips parted, allowing my tongue access to her luscious mouth. Our chests touched each other; my arms came around her back. Clare's arms reached up to tangle in my hair. She then started moaning in approval as I groaned to match her satisfaction.

I broke away from the kiss, and Clare groaned at the loss. I mentally kicked myself for doing that as well. Her curls were tossed in a sloppy manner and I found that incredibly sexy.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

As Eli and I were kissing, I suddenly felt so free and attracted to him. I wanted to take the kiss further and it was all going _**so**_ well _that is_ until he broke away from it.

"Clare?" Eli asked after her broke away from my arms

"What's wrong? Did I do something bad?" I was worried

"No, no, no, you did just…perfect. It's just that I want to make sure you're okay with where we are taking this. I don't want to offend your beliefs or anything." He said as he eyed my purity ring.

"Eli, I'm allowed to kiss and _**other stuff**_." I corrected him

"I just want to be sure, in that case…_do you want to continue_?" Eli questioned

I leaned over and started kissing again.

Over time Eli and I deepened our relationship. Julia eventually stopped bothering the both of us and became pregnant by no other than K.C. Jenna's relationship with Julia was gone along with Bianca. My dad was getting more and more late 'business' meetings and my mother became suspicious, I tried to confront the problem, but they always pushed me off to the side, Alli and I are still best friends, at times it is only her and Eli that I could trust as well as Adam, who became a good friend. Fitz still disturbed me, but I kept my distance as Eli grew a rivalry with him over time. Months passed and we are still a couple. Our junior year is about to begin. I still question at times **if Eli and I can make it through**. Part of me believes he is starting to _drift away _because of my entire 'purity' promise. I realize that I cannot lose Eli. I love him and I'm willing to do _**anything**_ to keep it that way.

* * *

**I honestly do not know when I will update since my comp. is going to have to get clean.** I'll try my best to do it as soon as possible.

Thanks for the reviews~!


	17. 11th Grade: Don't Let Me Go

Yay! My dad bought me a new laptop! Woohoo!

**This story will have a couple chapters left then it's finished. ;(**

Sorry that this chapter sucks. I personally hate it. Thanks for the reviews though! :)

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

As time went by Julia became pregnant by K.C., yeah _you heard me_. Those two were going at it behind everybody's back, at first Julia wanted to get an abortion, but her parents found out and were against it. The group has been falling apart; Fitz and I are not friends any more, it all started because he won't stop hitting on Clare. However she kept her distance and he's been on his own way. Adam and I are still the best of friends, but our girlfriends kept us pretty absent and remote from guys' night and other stuff.

As for Clare and I, It's almost going to be a year in which we became a couple._** I love her**_, but sadly I have not told her yet, I just chicken out every time the opportunity comes, but** that's going to change**, I plan on telling her tomorrow when I take her out for our date to the park. Lately Clare and I have been engaging in the same physical activities since the day we have been dating. It's not that I'm a pig or anything, but she doesn't like to go any farther than third base. I've been trying to be patient, but the truth is, sometimes I feel_...bored_.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

Eli says he is going to tell me something important tomorrow on our date. Frankly, I think he is going to break up with me. He's been so distant lately, when we go to the mall and girls flirt with him, he says he's not interested but I catch him _looking at them_. I was worried so I asked Alli for advice.

"Alli...where did I go wrong. I can't lose him, I love him!" I cried

"Clare, did you tell him that already?" Alli questioned

"I have been waiting for him to tell me, but it's almost a year! I think he is going to break up with me, but I have no clue what I did wrong?" I sobbed into Alli's shoulder

Then Alli stared softly at my purity ring.

"Clare...how far have you gone with Eli?" Alli asked

"Well, we kiss and we make out, with tongue." I said

"Clare, do you let him touch you?" Alli asked confused

"Touch me? Well...he touches my waist and my face." I answered

Where was she going with this?

"Oh my goodness! Clare! Are you serious?" Alli gasped

"Yes...why is something wrong?" I sobbed

"Clare! I'm going to say this as a friend because I love you…but you and Eli are heading nowhere at this rate! You've got to take things to the next level, as sweet and patient as Eli may be, no guy, **believe me **no guy will hold their hunger, and in the end they will go away and find someone else who will fill their appetite, no guy wants to be with 'Virgin Mary' their entire life, you guys are in high school and you are waiting for sex until you marry, that's not for another five years, or more." Alli said

She was right and I took in the sad realization.

"But, Alli...I'm nervous...I" I said

"Clare...do you love him?" Alli said as she held my finger wrapped with my purity ring which is engraved with the quote 'True Love Waits'

"I do, I would Alli, it's just I can't betray my parents with the promise I made."

"I understand Clare, you don't have to be with Eli, and it's his loss if he can't appreciate your promise." Alli said as she pulled me in for a hug and wiped tears off my face.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

Today is the day! I'm going to tell Clare I love her, I even bought her a necklace with a heart engraved with a cross _just for her_. I went to Clare's home and rang her doorbell, it was eight at night and I was planning to take her to the abandoned church, the same place where our first date was.

"Hello Eli." Mrs. Edwards said dully, how strange? She seemed angry and looked as if she had cried.

"Hello, is Clare home?"

"Oh yes, she'll be down in a second, I've got to... run some errands. Goodbye." She replied and out she went through the door. It was weird, Ms. Edwards usually told me to have Clare back by eleven, but she didn't this time.

"Eli?" Clare asked through her stairs as she walked down, she looked as beautiful as ever.

"Clare, you ready?" I asked

"Yeah, um where did my mom go?" She asked worriedly

"She said she had to go run some errands...is everything okay?" I asked

"Yeah, I think so...let's go." She replied

_Weird._

The drive was silent, and I felt that something was wrong with Clare. She looked sad and I wanted to ask her what was wrong, but each time she assured me that everything was okay. We sat near each other in the date and talked _**like we always did**_. Then I was about to tell her that I loved her when she interrupted me.

"Eli?" She asked worriedly

"Yes?" I asked

"Does it bother you...?" She paused

"What bothers me?" I wanted her to continue

"That...we don't, take things to the..._next level_?" She sighed.

I wanted to yell 'Hell yeah! I've wanted you in so many ways, but you don't let me!'

"Well, it's not my favorite thing...but it's what's got to be, right?" I replied

She sighed.

"I, I'm just not ready you know?" I said

I respect Clare, but sometimes it angered me that we always had to do things _her way_. I never get a say in anything between us, something inside heated up when she replied that.

"I know you're not Clare, but what about other things? I mean sex is not the answer to everything." I offered

"Eli...I can't." She said

_**That's it**_.

"Clare, I don't want to sound mean or pushy, but...are we just going to be _**just **_kissing all the time?" I asked

"Eli...I don't know." She said looking away from me.

You see what I mean? Always her way!

"Clare, then when? The truth is...I've been too patient. Sometimes I want to demonstrate you how much I care for you, but your always distant in everything nowadays." I said more serious than I intentionally wanted to sound like.

"Eli! Please understand!" She hissed

"Clare, I've been trying to from the beginning, we're not nine, I'm not asking for you to jump at me naked, come on! Seriously, I've been on dates that are easier than you, and I've been dating you for a year!" I was so frustrated, it's been too long, and as much as I love her, ladies...seriously, Clare Edwards was beginning to be the definition of a prude.

She stared at me shocked and hurt, and then it turned into anger.

"I made a promise Eli!" she yelled

"Problem is I didn't." I simply stated.

She stood there and looked in disbelief, as her eyes swelled with tears.

"Are you breaking up with me?" She said in a low tone

I thought for a while, my silence caused her so much anxiety to know if the answer was either a yes or a no.

"Of course not. I just, Clare...I'm sorry. I should be more understanding. Sorry for being a jackass." I sighed, Clare was too much for me to lose.

"Eli...I'm so sorry, I am ready for you...it's just I made a promise to my parents. I love them too much to betray them in that way." She sobbed

I pulled her in for a hug and breathed the three words that I was feeling in that moment.

"_**I love you**_."

She pulled away and looked at me with those swollen red blue eyes which were dilated with such compassion.

"I love you too...since the day I saw you moving into your house when we were seven years old and you called me 'four eyes'." She gasped out of her sobs.

I stared at her with awe and admiration.

"I'm sorry for being an asshole to you when we were young." I chuckled

"You have nothing to be sorry for." She mumbled

I pulled out the necklace and gave it to her, she stared at it attentively and looked at it as if she hated it

"If you don't like it, I'll return it." I replied. _Oh no_.

"No! I love it...I just...I love you so much." She said as she clutched onto my shoulder

I drove her home, yet the ride was silent, you'd expect us to be all lovey dovey know that we each know how we truly feel, but the sadness of Clare and my frustration from the past argument still lingered on.

I dropped her off home and pulled me in for a soft kiss,_ like always_.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I know knew how Eli felt, but I want to have sex with him..._but my parents_. Alli was right, at the moment I did believe he was going to end it all, but he didn't, instead he proved to be yet again the sweetest boy I had ever met. The moment when he told me he loved me, I melted. Then he had to give me the most beautiful necklace ever. The fact that he was right... that I do not give in, and he is too sweet to me angered me. Eli was always giving a hundred percent in effort for our relationship, while I failed miserably. Then I was interrupted out of my thought as I heard my parents arguing, this was strange, my parents always got along just fine but lately have been so distant. This was all new to me.

_"Randall! I saw the messages in your desktop! I know it's true, why would you do this to me!"_

_"Helen! I don't even know her!"_

_"Stop lying! How could you do this to me, Darcy, and Clare!"_

_"Helen, please, listen to me it was only a onetime thing!" My father screamed, it was silent for a while and then I heard dishes being thrown and broken, I walked downstairs and peeked through the little hole down my stairs wall._

_"Don't you dare lie to me anymore! All those 'late' business meetings? I'm not stupid." My mother spat harshly_

_"Helen, I'm sorry, but you were so distant! I needed someone to make me feel like a man! Each time I tried to touch you, you would always cringe!" My father hissed_

My mother stared at the floor with disgust as my father watched her with such remorse drawn on his face.

_"That's it, I guess." My mother sobbed_

_"I guess that's it then." My father sighed_

"Are you two getting a divorce?" I said, they both shot their faces up at me surprised and scared.

"Clare! How long have you been there, I thought you were on your date?" My mother said more calmly as she wiped her tears.

"Long enough." I said as tears started streaming down my face.

They both stood there quiet and looked at me with a heartbreaking expression, which already gave the answer away. I walked away towards my room and slammed it shut.

I felt so angry, how could my father do this to my mother? I wanted to punch someone so hard, this day was already too bad. Then the same words ran through my head as I lied on my bed.

_"Helen, I'm sorry, but you were so distant! I needed someone to make me feel like a man! Each time I tried to touch you, you would always cringe!" _

If my mom would have been more adoring with my father, then he would have never cheated. If I_ continue _to be so distant with Eli, he will leave me.

This cannot happen.

As I pondered the situation, I thought about it, I love Eli with all my heart and trust him more than anybody, the true reason why I never wanted to go any further with him was because of my parents, They always expected me to be someone 'pure' and 'innocent' in everything, and the fact that they were always with during the hardest times of my life:** Kenya, Eli, K.C., Julia, the fight, my first date, my relationship with Eli**, had made me want to please them in every way possible. **As if I owed it to them**. However, what's the point of me keeping my promise to them when they broke theirs to me. I f I do anything it is because I love Eli and nothing else.

**

* * *

**

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I was in my room, minding my own business, when I heard screams from the Edwards household, I thought that maybe it was their television, or Mr. Edwards had some friends over. My parents were gone to a concert filled weekend and felt so isolated.

It was midnight, when I suddenly heard rustling through my window, someone was knocking on it. I opened it and found Clare trying to get in.

"Clare? What are you doing here? It's midnight." I hissed

"Eli..I-I-I love you." She looked at me blankly with her red swollen eyes as she stuttered.

"Clare...I love you too. What's wrong?" I sighed as I pulled her in for a hug.

"Are your parents home?" Clare asked

"No, remember I told you they would be gone for the whole weekend."

She nodded an okay, and unzipped her sweater, in which she was wearing a flimsy purple tank top and pinned me down my bed, and started kissing me with more passion than ever before.

Her ample breasts that were popping out of her shirt made contact with my chest as she tried to pull off my shirt. I gave in.

"Clare?" I gasped. _What was all this sudden passion?_

"Eli,** I want to be yours**." She moaned

As much as I anticipated hearing that for a while now, something didn't feel right.

"Clare, you don't have to do this, I'll wait for you." I replied

"No, Eli this isn't about waiting anymore, I'm ready. I swear. I love you." She started kissing me again

She then took off her shirt and exposed her pink lacy bra. Her hands clawed my back as she pressed herself against me, inserting her luscious lips over mine.

"Clare, something's wrong, this isn't you. Tell me." I panted; my pants tightened at each touch Clare gave me, and was still shocked at her sudden behavior.

She groaned and backed away from me.

"You don't want to have sex with me?" She sighed disappointed as she reached for her sweater; her face ran with such embarrassment.

"Of course I do, I just...something is wrong with you and I need you to tell me." I sighed, as I reached for my t-shirt and put it back on.

She started crying and covered herself.

"I'm such an idiot." She blushed

"Clare, no you're not...just tell me what happened, please."

She turned her head away from me and exhaled forcefully then met her eyes with mine with sorrow.

"Eli...my parents are divorcing." She sobbed

I pulled her in for a hug as she rested her head on my shoulders.

"Clare...it'll be okay. I'm here with you...Sex isn't the answer to your frustration."

"Eli...I want to have sex with you because I love you, not because of my parents. I can't lose you." She said

"Clare, but why tonight? Why all the sudden passion?'"

"Because, tonight I realize that I want to be yours, forever. I can't wait any longer, because each second means the more and more I lose you, I want you because I want you to be mine, and I want to be yours."

I leaned in and wiped her tears off her face.

"Who says you are going to lose me?"

"We've been so distant lately, and it angers you and…"

"Clare, I'm here with you, I'm not leaving you okay." I whispered into her ear

"Eli, please make me yours, I want you to be mine." Her breath hitched

"No regrets?" I questioned

"I swear." She smiled and hugged me tightly

"Okay, but I want to make you love some other time, not tonight. You deserve better than this. Besides, I want you to be five-hundred percent sure when we do so." I replied as she rested her head on my shoulders and began sobbing

"Can I stay here tonight? I don't want to go back and hear my parents arguing."

"Of course you can"

I pulled here near my side as we snuggled until our energies were completely wasted.

"Goodnight Eli, I love you." She nuzzled her head on my chest

"I love you too Clare." I smiled

She needs me as much as I need her.

* * *

Do you hate me for having them have sex later on? Tell me?


	18. 11th Grade: Stay or Go

This chapter is horrible, but I got writer's block. Shoot me if you must. :(

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I told Alli about my sudden 'outburst' towards Eli, she thinks I'm crazy for having done that, but deep down I know I want to be_** his **_badly.

"You were just going to throw down sixteen years of your religion down the drain in a second! You're lucky Eli isn't K.C. or Fitz who would have ripped off your clothes in that instant!" Alli scolded me

"I know, it was a stupid idea in the moment, but I do love him, and he loves me, I think I'm ready." I sighed as I fidgeted with the silver-hearted necklace Eli had given me.

"Clare...why all of a sudden, you've been dating him for a year, and when your parents decide to divorce you decide to have sex with him? I mean...don't just 'do it' for the wrong reasons, your parents' divorce shouldn't change the way you thought of your beliefs before."

"But it has and...If it's anyone I want to be with its Eli and him only." I replied as I plopped myself into Alli's bed.

"The question is, do you want to be with him, now?" She asked

Did I? What if I regret it? No, I love Eli.

"Not now, but when the moment comes you know? How did you know when yours was with Drew?" I asked

She sighed dreamily and twirled a strand of her hair, as her hands reached to interlace mine.

"I guess it's when you don't have any bit of doubt in your mind. When you feel this strange and sudden need to have them in your arms, when it's...you'll know when you get there. All I can say was that, my first time, I think fifteen was a bit too young, but I only regret the level of maturity we both had at the time." She smiled as she patted my head

"Eli has been so helpful with my parents' divorce, it hasn't been great, my dad bought a condo a couple miles away from here, and I only get to be with him on Sundays, when he's not working. My mom is always gone with her friends, we can't go to church anymore, and they always judge my parents too harshly."

"I'm glad you have someone else to be with you, other than me when I'm not there." Alli hugged me

"It's seven, I got to go, my mother said to be gone for a little while." I replied as I looked at my watch and said goodbye to Alli.

As I was walking home, I passed by the park only to see Julia with her baby, it was a boy from what I heard, and K.C. stayed out of the picture, I couldn't help but feel sorry for her, but her parents were supporting her.

"Edwards!" she yelled as she was cradling her child

"Yes?" I walked over to her slowly

She looked at me and bowed her head down.

"Sorry." she sighed

Excuse me?

"For what?" I asked

"For...everything, I know I wasn't such a good person in the past, but I want to apologize for being such a tool to you in middle school and high school." She said as she stood there.

I glanced at her child and back at her.

"There's nothing to apologize for Julia, we didn't know any better when we were younger." I sighed

She gave me a faint smile.

"You know, Eli is the sweetest guy I ever met, he's really something. It's nice to know someone makes him as happy the same way he made me. He deserves the best." She said as she started walking away

"Julia." I abruptly called her name

She turned around.

"It's good to know your son will have a great mother, I wish you all the best." I smiled

She nodded and walked away.

I reached home, my mother was on the couch watching television, she seemed happier without my father and so did he, he however moved on pretty quickly and was dating a woman ten years younger than him. Melissa was her name, I didn't like her, but my dad seemed happy and that was all that mattered. It was barely a week after they started living apart and their divorce was still in the process and I'm not going to lie, I felt betrayed by my father, here I was with my mother and Darcy in Kenya and he prancing across town with his new arm candy, I felt useless around him.

"Are you hungry sweetie?' My mother asked

"No, Eli is taking me out to eat in an hour." I replied

She smiled and walked towards me.

"He's a good boy...I remember when you were eight and you told me that you were going to _marry_ him someday." she sighed

"Really? What else did I say?' I was amused

"That you loved him and that he was your boyfriend. I remember one time, you begged me to set up a play date with him, so I went to go talk with his mother and she agreed. The next day you packed bunches of Barbies and teddy bears into your little bag and walked over by yourself. Eli was angry that you brought dolls and slammed the door into your face. You didn't bother him ever since." She laughed humorously

I joined as well.

"Who would have thought the same boy who 'hated' you would be taking you out on special little dates every weekend." She chuckled and walked into the kitchen

She was right, who would have thought? The same boy who called me 'Cootie Queen' or treated me like crap when we were little, tell me he loved me.

I walked upstairs and dressed into a yellow buttoned blouse with navy tights. I waited, until my mother called me to come downstairs, that Eli had arrived.

He stood at the door frame leaning and smirking at me as I approached him. He started to pull me in, until we both noticed my mother was still at the door watching us back and forth.

"_Later_." I whispered

He nodded and my mother nonchalantly waved at the both of us to leave.

"Have her home by eleven, Eli." My mother said as she walked upstairs

"Sure thing, Ms..." He looked at me and I just motioned him to stop talking.

We were then walking down the streets, hand in hand.

"Sorry about that, what do I call your mother now?" He stated awkwardly

"Its okay, just don't call her anything." I smiled

"Are you okay with your parents, is everything alright? You seem kind of bothered." He rubbed his thumb with my palm

"Yeah, I'm getting used to it, I video chat with Darcy and she's been supportive. Alli's been really helpful too. But...your always there for me too."

"That's me, your rock." He furrowed his eyebrows as he half-laughed it off

"Where are we going tonight?" I asked

"I don't know...how about we just walk around, pick up something from the diner across the dot, and go back to my place. My mom's only home." He offered

"Sounds great." I smiled

After walking around the park and eating steak burgers, we arrived at Eli's place. It was pretty weird knowing my mom was home right next door, thinking I was out of town, if not being a minute away.

"Clare! You're here." CeCe smiled at me and pulled me in for a hug.

"Hi, Mrs. Golds- I mean CeCe." I laughed

"Eli baby boy, I got to go drop off your dad's dinner off at the station. I'll be back in awhile." She pulled away from me and grabbed her keys and exited out the door with a plastic bag in her hand.

Eli stepped close into me as the door shut and gave a small smirk.

"So...two teenagers home alone? What to do, what to do?" He sighed playfully

I gave him a small kiss on the lips and pulled away.

"That won't do Clare." He laughed

"Then show me." I stated boldly, however my cheeks flustered a crimson red when he got closer to me.

He caressed my cheek. "I love you so much."

"I love you too." I smiled and pulled him in for a deep kiss, he led me to his bedroom, and we continued a steamy make -out session the rest of the date. He was such a gentleman and never mentioned the topic of sex again, because he respected the fact that I would decide when and where I would want him to make me.

"Eli-" I moaned out of the kiss

He broke apart from me giving a small frown.

"It's eleven, I have to go..." I sighed

"Your coming to my game tomorrow, right? It's city-championship, I've been waiting for this since...you know three years ago, this time I want you to stay and watch instead of going to Africa." He laughed

"Of course. I'll be your cheerleader."

"If I don't win-"

"Eli! I know you will, you'll score thousands of goals!" I reassured him "I know you can. I have faith in you."

"Let's take you home then, I need you well-rested to watch me at tomorrow's game then." He grinned and walked me home

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

"I'll be waiting to see your face in the crowd then. Remember twelve o'clock sharp." I reminded her

"I wouldn't miss it for the world, but why can't you take me?" She wined

"I told you, I have to go an hour early to warm up. Besides, Adam said Fiona would take you."

"Okay." She gave a small pout and hugged me before she walked inside her door.

I was really excited for my game. I needed to win, my coach pressured me so hard to train and ordering me to do my best the next day. Also, Clare was going to watch me and I dearly wanted to impress her.

I was lying on my bed when Adam called.

"Hey." I simply answered

"You ready for tomorrow's game?" He questioned eagerly

"Yeah, Clare's coming to watch...is Fiona still going?"

"Of course, she said if I win she'll give me a 'special surprise'." Adam laughed suggestively

"Yeah." I replied flatly

"Why? Someone mad that their girlfriend doesn't give some yet?" He teased

"Of course not, when she's ready, I'll be happy to wait." I shot back

"Anyways, some of the guys and I have been hearing some serious rumors." Adam informed

"What type of rumors?" I asked

"Well, Josh said that he overheard Coach say that there were going to be some scouts at the game tomorrow, like from big leagues." Adam said optimistically

"Scouts? Yeah right." I said

"I'm dead serious. Imagine, if we get scouted we could make it into the FIFA!" Adam squealed

"Keyword is imagine, you have your head up in the clouds too much man. Josh is a bluffer, he's probably lying so we could get psyched and play really good tomorrow. Anyways I got to go, we have to wake up early tomorrow and it's already past midnight." I yawned

"'Kay, see you tomorrow then, let's beat the other team like a boss." He laughed

I then dozed off to sleep.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I was really excited to watch Eli play, he was so talented. He's always been practicing like crazy for this game. I remember that's what brought us together was soccer after all, I mean he kicked me in the head with the ball and one thing led to another. I put on a magenta buttoned blouse and a jean skirt and exited the door, I was waiting for Fiona to pick me up since she was going to the game to watch Adam, on few occasions have I spoken with Fiona and she was a sweet girl.

A lavish blue car pulled up in front of my house and I walked to it.

"Hi Clare." She smiled

"Hey Fiona!" I gave a grin

"Are you excited! Adam won't shut-up about this game since months." She chuckled

"Yeah, Eli has been practicing really hard."

"Well, we should get going." She said

When we arrived we say Adam and Eli practicing, Eli was kicking shots at Adam, which he would try to defend. They both turned around and smiled at us and continued practicing as Fiona and I made our way to the benches.

Then the game began.

Eli was unstoppable, every shot was made by him with the help of his teammates of course. Fiona winked at me a couple of times or so for the fact that Eli was on top of his game, Adam was a good defense too, but failed once in a while. The team couldn't keep up with Eli's moves, sprints, and dodges. He was amazing. The fact that his hair was tousled into a messy, sweaty jumble and that the blue uniform covering his athletic body peered through his muscles, made me more attracted to him.

They won.

Eli cheered happily as all his teammates ran to him and picked him up as if he were a rock star, they chanted his name over and over, and I tried to run my way over there and give him a victory kiss, but floods of people surrounded him. Girls were hovering him, and a pang of jealousy hit me. I tried to make my way through the crowd, but by the time I had, a man was speaking with him far away.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

We won. I won. My dream came true, I was so happy and fulfilled, and everyone was cheering my name. Everything was perfect, except that my parents did not come, but it was okay, my dad had a radio convention and my mom was at work, so the fact that Clare came made up for the absence.

As I was searching for Clare, my coach came towards me and gave me a wide grin and a firm handshake.

"Eli, good game!" He shouted

"Thanks Coach, I guess all that practice really did pay off." I smiled

"I knew you had the potential since day one, that's why I pushed you. I have someone who wants to speak with you."

"Who may that be?" I asked curiously

"Eli meet Coach Gerald, a college buddy of mine." The coach gestured to man in a black suit with a smile plastered on his face, he then held his hand out and I shake it.

"Pleasure to meet you Eli. I saw you play today and you have much potential. I would like to recruit you into the Barcelona FC that is after you graduate high school." He said

Was this a dream? My jaw literally dropped.

"A-a-are you s-serious?" I asked stunned

"No joke. You can speak with your parents about it, here's my card." He smiled and started walking away

"Just call me, when you decide on your offer, I'm only in the country for two more days. So, you have little time to think about it." He added and left.

"Thank you so much Coach!" I yelled and gave him a huge hug

"No problem. If I were you, I would have my decision ready by the end of today, this is a once in a lifetime chance." He patted my head and left.

Adam walked towards me.

"What did Coach want?" He asked

"I got recruited to the Barcelona FC!" I laughed heartedly

Adam's eyes bulged out of his head and then started jumping up and down

"Eli! I'm so proud man! I can't believe this, man I'm going to miss you, and I could see it now, you in Spain and play-"

"What?" I interrupted

"What did I say?" Adam questions

"Shit." I muttered at the sudden revelation.

"What's wrong Eli?"

Clare. That's what's wrong, I'm going to...I will be out of the country.

"I'm not going to accept it." I answered bitterly

"What! Eli are you crazy! Why!" Adam waved his hands

"Clare, I can't leave her." I answered

"Eli! This is a once in a lifetime chance! You're telling me, you are going to give up your dreams for a girl!" Adam scolded me

"I love her, and her parents are divorcing, she needs me Adam." I whined

"Eli, if she loves you she'll understand. Eli, don't do this, if you reject this, then I'll be so disappointed in you. I would kill to get recruited and you're tossing it away?" Adam asked

This is my dream, and then Clare is the love of my life. But, Adam was right.

"How do I tell her?" I questioned

"Tell who what?" Clare came out of nowhere with worried smiled.

"I've been looking everywhere for you. I'm so proud of you Eli." She rushed over me and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

"I should go see Fiona." Adam said abruptly and left.

I looked down into her blue eyes and saw a precious smile.

"Eli? You haven't answered my question. What are going to tell and to whom?" She asked innocently.

* * *

Oh? Could this be the end of Eli and Clare? Only three or four more chapters left.

Sorry for the lateness but life has been so hectic. I don't know when I'll update.


	19. 11th Grade: My True Love Waits

I'm so sorry! I haven't updated for a while! But, my grades have been slipping, and I've been putting extra effort in school, I feel really bad I can't update frequently like I used to. This story will ALMOST be over. You guys are so kind and supportive! Really! All I can do is give you my most sincere apologies.

**

* * *

**

**Eli's P.O.V.**

My heart pounded with adrenaline and fear, with what I was about to tell Clare. _Maybe I should tell her some other time; she doesn't have any idea anyways._

"Who was that man you were just talking to?" Asked Clare

She was starting to suspect and I couldn't lie to her...like Adam always says 'It's better to rip the bandage off!'

"Hey, do you want to go for a walk? Over there?" I pointed to the grassy path embedded in the park, the one where we usually walked on our dates.

"Sure." she smiled, but I could tell she was worried.

The walk was silent,_ this was a first_.

"I'm really proud of you Eli." She gripped my hand tightly

"I'm glad." I kissed her temple

"Is something wrong?" Her voice was shaky.

"There's actually something I want to tell you." I sighed and for once fake smiled at her, although guilt was consuming me on the inside.

"What is it?" She sat down a near bench, as I flung my soccer equipment to the ground.

"The man at the game today, the one you saw me talk to earlier...he's a scout." I smiled faintly

Her eyes lit up, and she gave me a beautiful grin.

"Really? What did he say?" She was overwhelmed

"He says I have potential, and wants me to go practice soccer in this _team_ he's coaching..."

Clare gasped excitedly and pulled me in for a tight hug.

"Eli! I'm so happy for you! You have to tell your parents, I'm sure they'll let you go, it's your dream!" She said as she kissed my cheek.

I looked away, and sighed.

"W-what's the matter?" She asked

"I'm not going."I kept my eyes fixated on the grass.

"What? Why? You have to!" She begged

If only she knew, but I could not leave Clare, I loved her too much.

"Clare-"

"Eli! This is a once in a lifetime chance, you've worked too damn hard for this!" She commanded as her eyes began to swell with tears.

"Why are_ you _crying?" I asked

"Because...it hurts me to know that you are about to give up on your dream." She choked on her sobs.

"It's in Spain." I muttered softly; however she heard and looked at me with pain in her eyes.

"I can't leave you here, I love you too much." I continued

She looked away for a while and stared into the sky; her tears were forming even more and started running down her cheeks.

"Go." She simply stated.

"What?" I asked

"_**Go**_, go fulfill your dreams, not even ten billion miles could stop me from loving you." She answered.

"Clare, but what about you?" I asked

"Eli, forget about me, you've been taking care of me since my parents divorced, I'm strong enough to deal without you being here physically." She smiled as she wiped the tears off her face.

"But- you could come with me... we could..."

"Eli, you know that's impossible. My parents would never let me go with you, I can't leave my mother alone, she's barely coping with the divorce, and besides, you can't have any distraction when you'll be practicing to be the world's greatest soccer player."

My hand reached her as I softly interlaced her fingers with mine.

"I love you." I kissed her.

"I love you too, we should get going, and you should tell your parents about that offer." She sighed and started walking ahead; I couldn't help but notice that she still seemed sad-

"Eli? You coming?" She asked steps away from me.

"Yeah." I smiled back and ran up to her.

The walk from the park was even worse than the previous one, we were both quiet even though my arm rested around Clare's shoulder and her curls made contact with my neck, and it was a moment when words were not needed.

When we arrived, she gave me soft kiss and wished me luck, allowing me to leave.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

The door closed. I ran uncontrollably upstairs to my bedroom and hit my body on my bed as I began to sob. I don't want him to leave...he can't. On the inside I am dying and regretting the permission I gave him, but I couldn't do that to him. He's done so much for me and I..._I need _to return him the favor. Our junior year was about to end, senior year was coming, next thing you know, I am off to college and he'll be in Spain. Away, from me.

_Fast Forward. Last day of school. Junior year is over._

_

* * *

_

**Eli's P.O.V.**

The bell had rung. Students went down the hallways and grabbed papers and books out of their lockers, tossing them around, only to be a pain for the janitors later on. I shook my head as I walked out the doors to wait for Clare besides Morty.

_"Yo Eli! Good Luck in Spain Bro!"_

_"Hey don't get a big head!"_

_"Eli! Remember me when you're all famous!"_

_"Good luck!"_

_"Have fun!"_

As I walked down the halls, everyone was wishing me luck and saying their goodbyes. I received fist-pounds, handshakes, hugs, and girls even crying to me.

So, yeah I am leaving to Spain next week. Sure, my parents and I expected that I would leave once my senior year would be over, but the coach says I have to start practicing, _before_ I actually go to college. I took the news pretty well, but Clare on the other hand tried to act as if she was okay with it. I was stupid enough to believe her, which is until I could see her crying in her bedroom window every night. It killed me to know she was hurting like this, but the decision had already been made.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"Clare, I'll be over tomorrow at seven okay? Call me if you need anything." Alli hugged me tightly as she exited out of the hallway with Drew.

I grabbed my belongings from my locker and put them into my bag. All the students were out of the halls and into the streets, going out to the Dot and the park. Eli was leaving in two weeks and I was painfully dealing with the idea at a very slow rate.

As I was walking down the halls, I ran into a group of boys tagging the staircase. One of them just happened to be Fitz. He and Eli were no longer friends and both ignored each other's existence.

I tried my best to sneak past their way, so he would not notice me.

"Well, well, well, Eli decided to leave you alone on the last day of school?" Fitz grasped my arm, as he motioned the rest of his gang to leave.

"He's actually waiting for me outside." I said as I shook off his grip from my arm.

"So I've heard, he's leaving you for Spain...you know I hear the girls over there are pretty promiscuous...not to mention highly beautiful. They can't get enough of us Canadian men." Fitz taunted

Jealousy began to swarm within me. Maybe he was right? What if Eli met a gorgeous Spanish model?

"That's why I was thinking...if anything ever happens, you could always give Fitzy a call, and we could have our little soccer 'matches'. I'll shoot you some awesome goals." He chuckled suggestively

I scoffed at him and began walking away rapidly towards the entrance. I gain posture, once I saw Eli smiling at me as he had his back in front of Morty with his arms crossed.

I decided to ignore what had happened, if Eli knew Fitz was bothering me again, he would be in a bad mood and he doesn't need to worry when he's about to leave the country soon.

"Hello." He smirked as his arms snaked my waist and began to kiss me.

"Hey." I whispered into the crook of his neck, my body trembled with anxiety, each time his touch made contact with my skin.

He cupped my face, "Are you okay?" he breathed into my forehead.

"Yeah." I sighed

Right at that moment, Fitz walked out of the school and shot me a smile.

Eli tightened his grip on me and asked. "Did he bother you?" His voice was stiff and concerned.

"No. Just, drop it." I pleaded

"Clare, if he said any-"

"Eli. Please, let's go home and spend time, you're leaving soon and I don't need our time to be wasted." I begged

His hand caressed my curls and sighed, as he opened the door for me and got inside the car.

We arrived at the abandoned church.

"I thought we were going to your house." I asked confused.

"Well, CeCe is home, so is Bullfrog and I want to be...alone...with you." He smiled sheepishly.

I let out a small giggle and ran to the other side happily. "Race you!" I laughed

I ran and ran, with anxiety, I felt like a little girl. I hid behind a tree.

"Clare! Where o' where, could my beautiful Clare be?" He yelled playfully.

Silence then followed, and I heard a snap of several twigs and a loud thud.

I looked behind and saw that Eli was on the ground, his head was thrown back, and his eyes were closed.

I gasped softly, and moved closer to him, "Eli." I whispered

I bent down and placed my hand on his forehead, "Eli...ELI!" I started to worry.

"Oh God! Say something!" My voice shook, and I began to cry

Next thing I know, his arms embrace me tightly and plunge me on top of his body, he rolls me around, so that he is on top of me and smirks, letting out a hearty laugh.

The nerve of him!

I seriously thought, he was hurt or something, the thought of that scared me. And, he plays around with me like that!

"Get off of me." I gritted angrily

His face went from amused to confused.

"Clare..." He said as his voice croaked at the sudden realization.

I begin to walk away.

"I'm sorry, it was just a joke." He begs.

"You aren't a joke to me." I sigh and begin to wipe the tears of my eyes.

He pulls me into a hug.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He begs and caresses my cheek

"I didn't mean to make you cry." He sighs

"It's okay. I shouldn't have over-reacted, I just-don't play around like that!" I giggled

"Wow. You sure are bipolar." He joins

"It's just, don't mess around like that, I thought you were really hurt."

"Oh yeah Clare, twigs and stones are going to kill me, not to mention the dry grass, the blades are so sharp!" He mocks sarcastically

"I know, I over-reacted."

"No, I would have felt the same way about you." He says as he holds my hand.

"I'm going to miss this." My voice cracked

"I know. Me too." He averted his gaze, towards the sky, I could tell he wanted to cry but kept his eyes up from preventing it.

"I love you so much, don't forget about me when those gorgeous girls decide to flock you." I laughed dryly

"Don't say stupid things Clare, you know you're the only girl for me. Nothing compares to you." He smiled and a tear rolled of his cheek.

I kissed it away.

**

* * *

****Eli's P.O.V.**

I didn't want to leave. But, it's a dream that will provide me money and assurance in the future, not to mention it'll be something I love to do, besides the contract has been signed and there's no turning back.

I only hope that Clare and I can stay together.

**

* * *

****Clare's P.O.V.**

I arrived home, pretty late at night, and sighed when I noticed a note on the counter.

_Went to the market._

_-Mom_

I was alone, once again, and wanted to spend more time with Eli, even though I just said goodbye to him. I looked out of my window and noticed he was having dinner with his parents. I decided to not bother him, he was leaving soon and I realized, I wouldn't be the only one missing him, his parents would too, and deserved as much time as I did to spend with him.

I called Alli, to spend the night, she shortly arrived.

"So, where did Drew take you after school?" I asked as we walked into my bedroom

"Oh we went to the beach, a bunch of the football players were having a bonfire. I had to leave soon though, mom and dad were freaking out." She sighed

"Where did Eli take you?" She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively

"We went to, our usual spot, and just..._talked_." I said

"Clare, really, the boy is leaving for how long, soon, and you aren't building enough memories with him. You guys do the same thing each week! The Dot, the abandoned church, school, his house, your house, book readings, blah, blah, blah!" Alli rolled her eyes

"Well, Eli and I, just being together is enough for the both of us. We don't need parties or beach bonfires to have a good time." I said defensively

"I know, and that is what makes him special. You guys love each other. By the way...have you and him..." She rolled her hands

"Have us what?" I asked

"You know...sex." She sighed

"We talked about this months ago, he said he would wait for me. I was vulnerable at the time, I wasn't ready." I said

"Well, what about now?"

I blushed furiously at her question, truth was, and I had been ready.

"Oh, my." Alli gasped

"How long!" She added

"I don't know, we just haven't found the right time or place, his mom is always home, now that he's leaving, and my house is right next to his, what if my mom looked out the window?" I sighed desperately

"What are you waiting for!" Alli smacked my arm playfully and threw pillows at my face.

"Alli!" I gasped

"Clare! He is leaving this Saturday! He's going to be gone, for a very, very long time!' She snorted

She was right.

"I know, I thought about this a week ago, but I was confused." I paused "Alli, I...want to."

She squealed. "Well, we need to plan this!" She yelped

"How?" I asked

"First off, you need new underwear, your grandma panties won't do the trick. Condoms! We need to find the place, the day..."

"Alli! I don't think we have time for that."

"I do though, let me take care of it for you!"

"But...this is so wrong and weird."

"No its not, that's what best friends are for!" She hugged me tightly

A silence followed and abruptly I pulled away.

"Alli...does it hurt?" I asked

She smiled warmly at me.

"Clare, don't worry, I'm sure he'll be gentle."

I was a nervous wreck, the next couple of days, just the mentioning of something so simple would trigger me into the wrong idea. Eli became suspicious at my weird behavior, and each day we were closer and closer, enjoying each single second next to each other. He repeated that he loved me every single day until his mouth was dry, stopping him to speak any words. I was sure of this decision and I glanced at my ring remembering the times with it I had.

_"I don't see the point of someone like __**you,**__ has this I mean it's pretty clear by you appearance, NO one would ever have sex with you!" Julia smiled, a smile that made me want to slap it off her face, but don't cry Clare, You have to show you are better than that._

_"True, but it's my beliefs and I have to follow it whether you like it or not, which by the way is none of your business." I spat. Woah? Where did that come from._

My beliefs, and no one's business. I have the right to show Eli how much I love him.

_"_**True love waits**_? What is that supposed to mean?" Jenna asked stupidly, Julia then snatched it back._

_"It's a purity ring, retard."_

My true love, Eli, has waited and patiently. I wasn't deceiving the meaning or the belief. Maybe it was the stereotypical concept many praised, but how could I stop myself from giving something so special to someone who has done so much for me.

_"Eli it's not you it's me." I sobbed_

_He then stepped in closer, and brought my face up to meet his, and wiped away my tears with his soft thumbs. Making my cheeks have contact with his black stoned ring._

_"Why?" He asked in a comforting, more relaxed voice_

_"Because…I don't trust myself with you."_

_"Clare…you don't need to worry about that. I'll take care of you."_

He never failed his words, not once has hurt me intentionally, although his hate for me from our childhood has transformed into something beautiful, his intentions were never once purposeful.

_"I will do whatever it takes Clare…but someday, oh someday __**you will be mine**__, while __**I am already yours**__. That's a promise." He smiled and went home_

_He left me breathless with a melting heart. __**I already was his**__._

Nothing has changed from that moment.

I just need to prove it to him now.

**

* * *

**

**A/N:**

**Again, I DO NOT KNOW when I will update!**

**It's something I can't control. This story will continue though! PLEASE BE PATIENT.**


	20. 11th Grade: Bittersweet Situation

I know I said I didn't know when I would update, but I was all like _"God, I'm so horrible! How can I make you guys wait on that cliffhanger! Clare-Bear is going to lose her v-card!"_, and after all those awesome and nice reviews!

Plus, today is president's day so I had time. After this I may update in..._**2 weeks or less**_!

**Warning/ P.S: **I tried to make it in a borderline, between a little bit M, and still rated T, I know some of you guys wanted smut. But, be aware I have some readers who don't like reading that stuff, so I had to make a certain balance, so, sorry if I disappoint! I never wrote anything like this, so I had to ask my friend who reads lovey-dovey romance novels for help.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

Today was Thursday. Two more days and I would be gone; the thought of it left me both nervous and scared. Clare and I were spending mornings and afternoons with each other. Our love was a heaven destined for hell, and our separation was a decisive countdown, I couldn't help but be pessimistic about it. The past few days she has been really jittery and a bit distant, I was becoming worried, but figured she was acting like this since I would be leaving soon.

Clare has been begging me to drive to this antique book store out of town, saying that there was really good novels by under-rated authors. I couldn't help but agree the look on her face when she begged was too adorable. It was late in the afternoon when we decided to drive out, Clare was carrying a huge purse and looked perfectly divine in the blue summer dress she wore with her ruffled cardigan, something about her had a special glow that I've never seen before and my mind drifted somewhere else each time I looked at her, this was just another thing I would miss about her, her beauty that always leaves me speechless.

"Ready to go?" I walked towards the passenger door of Morty and gestured to her the door.

She fumbled in her purse checking if she had everything.

"Uh! I forgot something!" She yelped and went back inside, quickly.

"Clare, we're going to a book store, not a vacation to the Bahamas." I snickered

"Well, it's out of town and I need to be prepared." She hushed my mouth.

I leaned for a kiss, and she pulled away. I gave a confused look.

"Later." she smiled

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

The car ride was so awkward because of me. I was a nervous wreck, and my palms were sweating like a pig, my heart was trembling with each beat it made, and my feet continuously tapped the floor of Eli's car, to which I may add, annoyed the hell out of Eli, but remained quiet. I fidgeted with my purity ring as I glanced out the window, trying to avert his gaze. Just a look at him, and I would burst out laughing or something.

Alli planned it out, Eli thinks we are going to a book store; however it isn't one if not a hotel. She made reservations for us and took me lingerie shopping, two nights ago. Not to mention she's the one who snuck me in some of her condoms she uses with Drew, and made my mother think I was sleeping over her house tonight. Alli was a huge support, and aid.

All seemed according to plan, until Eli decided to take a shortcut, driving where the woods are, I was okay with the idea, then all of a sudden the worst happened.

Morty stopped.

"_Shit_. I mean...Uh-oh." Eli muttered

"What happened?" I stuttered

Eli fidgeted with the keys, trying to start the ignition.

"Morty broke down, again, in the worst possible time." Eli sighed

"Well, we could call a towing company or something." I offered quickly

Eli and I took our phones out, no signal.

He just had to take a shortcut, in the woods!

We both got out of the car and looked around the deserted area, covered with trees and grass fields, no signs of animals or humans.

"What now?" I asked

"What time did your mom want you home again?" He asked

"Well, she thinks, I uh _mean_, I told her I was sleeping over at Alli's tonight and you would drop me off after the _hotel_- I mean bb-ook store!." I said

"That explains the big bag then." He gestured to my purse, I nodded shakily.

The sun was setting in, and the stars were being faintly seen. It was turning into night.

"Well, I saw an auto-shop, a couple miles back, I would go to it, but there is no way I am leaving you here alone." He rubbed the back of his neck nervously

"I could go with you!" I offered

_Oh no_. My special night with him was getting ruined.

"Clare, no offense, but I could run all the way over there, I'm used to long distances, but you're not and I don't want you to get tired, plus, the road isn't so smooth and I'm afraid you'll trip or something." He said

"Okay." I sighed

We looked around, hoping that someone would come along the way, or walking in circles hoping for a signal.

"Crap, it's getting dark." He groaned

I sat on the hood of Morty, and he later joined me.

"So we're stuck here?", the thought saddened me, everything was going perfect and then this!

"I guess so." Eli breathed and put his arm around me.

I shrugged shakily.

"Don't be scared, I'll take care of you." He smiled

"Where will we sleep?" I asked

"Well, the back of Morty hasn't been washed in..._never mind tha__t_. The seats aren't comfortable. I have spare blankets in the back and it's a hot summer night, we could sleep outside." He offered nonchalantly.

I blushed.

"_Or_, you could sleep alone in the front seats of Morty, and I could sleep outside." He reassured me when he noticed my nervousness.

"No, we could sleep together, we've done it once before." I responded as I looked away, tearing my vision away from his, yet I could still hear the effort his mouth made to form into a smile when I said those words.

"Don't worry Clare; I won't take advantage of your perty little self tonight." He chuckled

I froze at those words.

Eli went to his trunk and pulled out a pale blue blanket and a spare flashlight he had in his glove compartment.

He set the blanket on a grassy spot.

"Come here." He patted the area next to him, I walked up to him slowly and sat down with him, he then pulled me in for a hug and the next moment we were lying next to each other, with the blanket underneath us, my head was laid in Eli's chest and his arms wrapped around my waist. We were looking at the stars until the moon surfaced the sky, it was quiet and the only thing heard was our breathing and the small hoots of owls.

I was beginning to feel safe and protected in his arms.

"What do you see?' Eli asked me as he pointed to a bunch of stars together

"A clump of white fire balls." I laughed

"_No_, look at that one in the middle, the big one,** really **look at it." He whispered

"I see a big star...next to a really little one, close together, and smaller stars surrounding those two." I said

Both of those stars seemed distant from the rest, but were attached to each other in some odd way. They were the brightest ones in the sky even though the smaller one was really little, however next to the big one it gave a shine I couldn't comprehend.

"That's what I see too." He patted my head

His heart started beating slowly as my ear heard each thump it made, I couldn't help but smile.

"When, I'm gone, I want you to search in the sky for a big star and a smaller one next to each other, and I will do the same, and if you can't find it, search for the moon." He added

"But Spain is six hours ahead, than over here." I protested

"Just because they appear at different times, doesn't mean they aren't the same. When I'll look at the sun or the moon, I'll know it's the same one you will be looking at hours later."

"Those are our stars then." I smiled

"Yeah."

We stood there quiet for a moment, my heart swelled at the realization.

_"How did you know when yours was with Drew?" I asked_

_"I guess it's when you don't have any bit of doubt in your mind. When you feel this strange and sudden need to have them in your arms, when it's...__**you'll know when you get there**__." _

I didn't need a fancy hotel or a skimpy, red lace bra and underwear set to give myself to Eli, I just needed him.

"Eli?' I asked

"Hmm?" He muttered as he gazed dreamily at the sky.

I looked at my purity ring, and sat up.

He locked eyes with me. I removed the ring I held in my finger for six years and clutched it to my chest; he got up as well and eyed each movement my hands made.

"I love you." I smiled as his eyebrows furrowed together and lips were pursed, I released the finger from my hand and grabbed his palm, opened it lightly and place it in his hand. "_Please_, **make me yours**." I whispered faintly as my eyes looked at him boldly and his face stood there stunned.

"_Clare_." He croaked

"Hurry." I grinned

"A-a-are you sure?" He stuttered

"More than ever." I hugged him tightly and breathed into his back

"I, I, don't have protection." He groaned

I ran quickly back to the car and grabbed the condoms out of my purse.

His face was amused and his eyes were opened widely as he saw what I had in my hand.

"You-you were p-planning this?" He gasped

"Well, were supposed to go to a hotel I reserved, instead of the book store, and _do it _there." I laughed

"B-but, n-now?"Boy was he shocked.

"I told you, I'm ready."

"You should have told me, we could have gone to somewhere nicer, I would've taken you out to dinner-"

"Eli, I just need you by my side and your touch, nothing else." My heart fluttered at his gaze

He closed his eyes tightly and let out a shaky breath, "I can't believe this is really happening."

Our hands held each other and fingers interlaced with one another. We gave a sweet kiss to each other and pulled away; my forehead lay against his chin, and looked up into his green eyes, as he looked into mine.

"How is it possible I ever thought these blue eyes were ugly?" He let out a nervous chuckle

"How is it possible you're the only boy I ever loved?" I snapped sarcastically

"You're the only girl I ever truly loved, forever...and...always."He breathed as he wrapped his hands around my waist and I around his neck.

"You know, this is my first time too right? If I'm not good-"

"Is that even possible?' I smiled and leaned in for another passionate kiss.

This kiss was different than all the others. It was a nirvana, the world literally became oblivious when I closed my eyes and our lips touched, as cheesy as this sounds, I could faintly hear music and feel fireworks exploding at each tender touch he gave me.

"Turn around, so I can undress." I muttered softly

He agreed to undress himself as well.

Why was each movement feeling like an eternity? I've undressed before, but it felt different, my body has never been seen in front of others before, and insecurities came by me, what if I could cover myself with a blanket or-

_Dear Lord! _He's already down to his boxers! I realized as I turned around to take a peek. My face blushed and I was so insecure, he was so confident and relaxed, I was the complete opposite.

I wasn't the only who was curious as well, as I saw Eli try and take a peak too.

"Please, no peeking...it's uh, embarrassing." I laughed awkwardly

He frowned and covered his eyes with his palms.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

For some reason it has come to this, and I couldn't manage to wonder how will it go, what will happen? This was really happening, it made me happy on the inside so much, if I could I would break into song and start dancing, I can't believe Clare is going to be mine, what if I'm bad at it, what if-

"Eli, you can...turn around now." Clare spoke

Oh, my goodness, I would see her naked. I couldn't tame the anticipation inside me, as I turned around slowly, knowing I wouldn't be failed by her beautiful bod-

She's still in her clothes?

"You're still dressed." I pointed out the obvious

She bowed her head down and breathed shakily and let out another awkward laugh, "It's okay, I...I want you to, _unss_-_ahem_-undress me, one by um, one." She smiled faintly

My heart skipped a beat when she said that, and I could feel my jaw drop.

"Aghh." I only managed to say

What the hell does _Aghh_ mean? _Man, she probably can see that you're obviously nervous, idiot!_

Our eyes locked for a brief second, but in her eyes I could see the passion and desire she gave in them. I could only hope she noticed the lust and love in mine.

* * *

**Clare's** **P.O.V.**

I don't know what to say or do, at a time, like this.

We sat by the blanket, Eli was down to his underwear and I still had my stupid summer dress on. I felt so shy, looking at him, his body was well built. All those soccer practices have done him well, he wasn't buff, if not toned and a faint ab line surround his stomach, his chest was glowing in my eyes, I had a desire to feel him...

"Look at me Clare." He whispered as he cupped my chin

"I don't know where to look." I answered sincerely

"If you don't want to do this anymore...we could stop. No pressure." He sighed

"No!" I yelped abruptly and raised my head, our eyes met again, only this time he gave me a comforting look, and I knew in that moment, there was nothing on Earth that could stop me now.

"Eli, take me." I said

His hands reached my shoulders and slowly pulled the straps of my dress down. At each movement he placed a butterfly kiss surrounding my body.

Next thing you know, I am in my bra and panties. He looks at me for a while and turns around to reach his flashlight.

"What are you doing?' I ask

"I want to see you; I never want to forget this."

He looks at me and places his incredibly shaky fingers on the straps of my bra, asking for permission.

I don't nod or say anything, but stay still, and lock eyes with him, never tearing my gaze away, and he knows just by the look on my face that I trust him.

I don't even feel him taking it off, that when he does so, I am still looking into his eyes.

**

* * *

**

**Eli's** **P.O.V.**

"You are...indescribable." I smile, genuinely. The truth was spoken, beautiful or gorgeous wouldn't be enough for her, from where I am looking.

Clare was truly beautiful inside and out, once I saw her creamy ivory skin exposed in front of me, the same way she was brought into this world, I for the first time blushed at the sight she gave to me, generously. Her breasts were perfect in my eyes, the curves she flaunted in front of me for several years and urged a heated curiosity within me, was more than fulfilled once I saw her, lying there in her naked glory.

My face heated up and instantly, everything was becoming _hard_.

My eyes traveled her body slowly, never wanting to tear the gaze away. I gulped inaudibly as my eyes gaze down and upward back and forth. She was making myself feel insecurity, only she could do to me.

"Love me tonight?" She asks shyly

"Tonight, and the next one, and the next one, and forever." I could only say, never in my life had I been speaking the truth consecutively in a certain period of time.

"Please, _make me yours_." She gasps as my hand caresses her body, in a circular pattern

I didn't have to be told twice.

* * *

**Clare's** **P.O.V.**

I will never forget the look he gave me in that moment. His eyes were blank, at a given point of view, but in mine, they held a raw emotion, the one Eli always said he felt about me, and I believed him, although I could never see it, he demonstrated it to me in kisses and caresses. But now, I saw it, for the first time.

He was laid on top of me and my eyes closed, then I feel his lips on top of mine, they kissed me slowly and tenderly. I know I won't regret this at all. In a sudden instant, memories filled my mind

_"HEY! YOU! What are you looking at four eyes!"_

_This is the moment I decide, boy with the green eyes and silky black hair, you are going to be mine someday. Someday…_

**Funny, how things started.**

_"Because Clare loves Eli!" Fitz exclaimed so loud that the whole class burst into laughter…and Eli looked angry, if not annoyed._

_"Ewww! Gross!" Eli snarled making the least attractive face I had ever seen on him, which was impossible since Eli was so cute, but maybe it was my heart which found it disgusting._

**How things escaladed from one thing to another.**

_"Oh, Man! Geez, I didn't see you there!" He exclaimed, go figure, Eli not noticing me._

_"It's uh-um alright, I guess it's my fault, my-y uhh head up in the-the clou-u-ddds you know?" I stuttered, so badly, it was the first time Eli had talk to me since the fourth grade. I tucked my head, facing the ground. Breathe Clare, Breathe_

_"What do mean, it's your fault, you're like in your own property?" He smirked, I could tell he found my embarrassment amusing. He then chuckled._

_"Clare? Right" He then said with the most gentle voice ever, I looked up_

_"Ye-ahh." I stuttered again_

**How I gained hope in sudden instants because of him.**

_"Hey…are you okay?" Eli was next to me, my savior! I did not even notice it, but I was crying._

_"Me? Yeah of course." I stated_

_"You're a terrible liar…what's wrong?" Eli asked concerned and sweet_

**How he cared about me, when I was invisible on the face of the Earth.**

_"First of all, I was seven, I didn't even know what hate was. Second, I just didn't expect someone like you…I mean __**you**__ to have the same interests as me." The laughing had stopped at the end of his voice, and I felt disappointed._

_"What do you mean someone like me?" I asked…strangely appalled._

_"I just meant that…umm." He was left speechless._

_"You mean…ugly, weird, and unpopular?" My voice cracked at those words_

**How two opposites came together, nonetheless.**

_"Whoa! What was that!" He yelled_

_"I thought that…" I spoke, but he interrupted her_

_"What the hell? I do have a girlfriend you know!" Eli was now a bit angry_

_"I'm sorry I just thought that..." I said_

_"Thought what?" Eli snorted_

_"That… you liked me for a second." I whispered, she was facing the ground_

_"No, no! Just because I am trying to be a good friend does not mean anything! Geez, I just wanted to see if you were alright, not to have you plant your lips on me, when you know very well, I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND! I knew this friendship was a mistake from the start!"_

**How? How, did we get this far?**

_**Fate**_**.**

I'm sorry mom, dad, God, sorry that I found someone that I want to give_ everything _to.

I looked up into his eyes and nodded in approval, as he entered me.

The pain was excruciating, and I cried at the contact he gave within me, but he rubbed my tears away and said that it would be over soon and that it would all be okay.

At the end of it, I didn't feel fireworks or doves flying out of the sky. The pain in my thighs was out of this world, so was the previous thoughts I had of what sex would be like, for the first time. We were both inexperienced virgins, and I know we both weren't good at it, the first time, but the deep, loving connection made up for the loss. I felt something real. He took something from me, I was glad he kept forever now.

An awkward silence followed and we laid there with each other, breathing again, and his heart echoed erratically, and my pulse matched his.

"You okay?' He asked softly

"Yeah." I smiled

"Not like the movies, huh?" He chuckled

Exactly.

"Nope. But you are the only one who could leave me this satisfied." I giggled

"Sorry, if I was bad, to be honest, I don't know what I was doing." He cringed at his words

"Neither did I, but I still loved it." I smiled and rested my head into his glimmering chest.

"I love you." we said at the same time, the same syllable and sounds escaped our mouths in unison from beginning to end.

This left us laughing even more. Then, one thing came after this.

We both cried in each other's naked bodies, and I knew he would miss me as much as I would miss him.

* * *

**Eli's** **P.O.V.**

How could we be so happy and content in one moment, and be so miserable in a day coming soon.

I never felt such a greater connection with Clare, than I did now, and I enjoyed it genuinely. Making love to her was a bittersweet situation, we both gave each other something that was important to each other. Our first time. I never want to forget it.

We stood in the same position, until dawn came, and the sun emerged out.

"Let's get you home." I offered

"Okay." she said

We both dressed, shyly. In the middle of the woods, as the clouds were forming slowly, the chirps of birds were echoed and the look on her face told me, she didn't regret one thing.

We walked to the auto-shop hand in hand, with a smile on our faces. No other place I would rather want to be now.

"Thank you." I said

"For what?"

"For loving me, being here, a part of my life, for living."

"I could say the same thing." She smiled lazily

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

He was leaving, tomorrow. But, I knew he would be worth the wait, and that eased the emotional pain.

_"What's wrong, did I make you feel uncomfortable." Eli asked worried_

_"No, it's just that…this was my first real kiss. And this is my first date. And you were my first crush, the first to break my heart and heal it, and you are my first boyfriend." I giggled heartedly_

Now he's my first love, and lover.

As our hands touched, I felt the silver band he held on his pinky finger now, which was in my index finger for several years. And I'm certain he felt the black stoned ring, I put inside my necklace, the same one when he confessed his love for me, when his nose nuzzled in my neck, making contact with the chain.

This, this is what love is all about.

* * *

Okay, so here is this chapter! I'm iffy with how it came out, like I hate it, but at the same time, I know that's the best I could do. It's so frikkin' long.

**REVIEW! **

**After all, I did stay up till two in the morning working on this because of pure guilt for you guys!**


	21. 11th Grade: You Shall Miss Me

What's up! Update, yay! This is a long one, but Eli is leaving! _What!_ Yes, now I tried to make it fluffy! :)

Last nights episode ruined my day, WTF Fitz! I totally laughed like a crazy girl when he said "I found the answer. I found Jesus." No, Fitzy, just no. And Eli? Why you scurry? I'm so scared and prepared for a cardiac arrest for the this week's episode.

_Anyways_, enjoy! This chapter was iffy in my book, but I couldn't think of anything better, but I have the rest of the plot for the future chapters planned out, all I can say is be prepared!

**

* * *

**

**Clare's ****P.O.V.**

"So, you got stuck in the woods and then what?"

"Well, we talked, and..._I just knew_, it was time." I sighed dreamily as Alli asked for details.

Making love with Eli was a dear memory and I could not regret it one bit, because my soul felt complete at the pure thought, and my body agonized for more at the touch he could give me, it was a calling.

"So, no hotel, no Victoria's secret? You mean, I did all that work with you, for nothing?" She huffed

"Well, you did more than that Alli, you were the one who helped me through all of this, and that's more than enough." I smiled warmly at her, only to be suffocated with a bear hug from her.

"So...was he good? Did he hurt you?"

"It was...awkward. It took him a couple of tries before he could..._you know_, and it was so painful, but he was so sweet the entire time."

"So, now what?" Alli's eyebrows furrowed.

"What do you mean?" I hesitantly asked.

"He's, leaving...tomorrow, in the afternoon. What's going to happen now?" Her voice cracked at those words.

"Well, he said he is going to call me every week, we're going to video chat, write letters..._we are going to make this work_." I stated firmly.

"_Clare_..." Alli frowned at my choice of words.

"Alli, Eli and I love each other, and our love will make it through, I know it can." I smiled confidently

"_I hope you're right_." She sighed

* * *

**Eli's ****P.O.V.**

"So how was it man?" Adam squealed.

"It was _amazing_." I laughed heartedly.

"I can't believe you deflowered Degrassi's last virgin!"

"Don't say that about her...besides it was more than that."

Adam nodded nervously at my words and looked away before asking again a question.

"So, how was the view?" His eyebrows cocked curiously.

"A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell." I said, only to earn a playful sock from him.

"What? I don't go asking about you and Fiona. Would you like it if I asked how she looked like naked?"

"I guess not, but if you asked nicely..." Adam grinned

"No thanks. I'm more than satisfied with my girl." I chuckled

"Man, I'm going to miss this...times like these, but you'll always be my bro." He sighed

"Hey! We agreed, we would call, text, chat..." I interrupted him.

"I know, I know...you're lucky I can handle _that_, but what about Clare?"

"Well, we will make it work, and if I can I might come back for the holidays and visit you know...every year." I smiled

"I _hope_ that really does happen, but anyways I have to go now, I have a date with Fiona tonight. I'll be back tomorrow early in the morning and tag along to go drop you off at the airport." Adam patted my shoulder before doing a fist pump with and then exited the door of my bedroom.

I was looking over at my suitcase making sure I had everything: pictures, clothes, laptop, phone, my awesome music collection, and passport.

"Knock, knock!" CeCe laughed before entering my room along with my dad.

"Hey guys." I smiled

"So, tomorrow..." My mother drawled nervously.

"Well, the brat's leaving tomorrow." Bullfrog chuckled finishing her sentence.

"Baby boy, do you have everything?" My mother sniffled a tear away.

"Yeah...oh come on! Mom, don't cry." I groaned and walked over to give her a hug as soon as I saw that she was crying.

"I-I'm sorry, it's j-just that you're leaving already!" She sobbed as I wrapped my arms around her.

"Look on the plus side CeCe, you won't have to cook for two, laundry will be less of a hassle, _and _we could finally have some of that alone time we've been waiting for a while now." Bullfrog winked, earning a deathly glare from my mother.

"I'll miss you too dad." I snapped sarcastically.

"Hey! You know I love you boy, just don't get a big head when you become famous. You, my friend, inherited the unbearable arrogance of your grandfather." He said.

"Arrogant? Me?" I fake laughed.

"Yes you, now we'll leave alone, considering that you are going to see Clareabelle-"

"It's Clare, dad." I interrupted.

"Sorry, I had a late show last night, my head is still kinda err- y' know." He laughed and enveloped me into a hug, before he and my mother exited the door.

I walked over to Clare's house and was greeted by her mother.

"Eli, come on in, so Clare's been telling me you are leaving tomorrow?" She gestured for me to enter her house.

"Yeah, tomorrow's the big day." I said, as I brushed my bangs to the side.

"Your parents must be so-"

"Eli!" Clare smiled as she ran downstairs into my arms, followed by Alli.

"Well, I've got to go now. Eli, good luck, I hope you have a safe trip." Alli smiled and exited out the door.

"Since, today is Eli's last day, I suppose I can extend your curfew Clare, just be safe." Her mother kissed her on the cheek and went inside her kitchen.

"Where do you want to go?" I asked her, pecking her lips.

"Tonight is about you." She whispered huskily.

My nerves kicked in at the tone of her voice, and I could felt my cheeks flushing a faint pink.

"I want to go somewhere special." I said.

"Let's go to the church." She suggested.

"The church? We always go there." I countered.

"But, that's what so special about it, our first date was there, and our first kiss." She smiled.

I pulled her in for a hug and walked her towards the hearse.

**

* * *

**

**Clare's ****P.O.V.**

Tonight was Eli's last night with me, and the thought circulated my mind every second. The feeling, knowing I wouldn't see him for a very long time was abnormal. Everything felt rushed and timed, as if our last moments were being counted down by the second. The looks he gave me were being recorded in my mind so I wouldn't forget. The touch he gave me was a lingering sensation; I hoped would last with me. And, this was a moment I know I would look back one day and wish I could go back to it; I knew I had to make the most of it.

When we arrived, we headed straight towards our usual hangout spot: the hammock.

I grabbed his hand and traced small circles across his palm, feeling the purity ring I gave him.

He looked at me and kiss my forehead, "Best night of my life." obviously referring to the night we both made love.

"I just wish..." I blushed and stopped at my words.

"What?" His eyebrows furrowed.

"Never mind, I...I know this is our last night, and it feels so, rushed. But, I want to spend it like...as if it were just another regular night, like we always do."

His lips were pursed into a flat line, and his eyes looked sad, but he grabbed my hands tightly and brushed his head on my shoulder.

"You know, just because you're leaving, doesn't mean we are ending something, so why are we going to make it seem like it's the last time we'll see each other in our lives." I continued.

He stayed quiet and faced towards me, he stared at my face intently and said, "You look gorgeous tonight, Clare."

I blushed, "You don't have to kiss up, I'm already yours."

"I only speak the truth, right now, you look really beautiful." He placed a kiss on my cheek and traced it to my lips, and then my neck. I locked my fingers through his silky hair as his hands roamed my body.

"We should have gone to Paris...or something." He muttered between kisses.

"You're so stubborn." I giggled.

"I love you, like _a lot_, I don't know if I've told you this before." He smiled.

"Not ever enough." I gasped.

I kissed him hungrily, as our tongues danced within each other mouths. I grabbed his hand and placed it on my waist, then somehow my body gained a mind of its own and I slipped my hand under his shirt, his muscles contracted at the touch I gave him, my finger clawed on his back, and I grew too impatient that I took his shirt off. His hands slid under my shirt as well, teasing with my bra strap.

"I want you...to, _make love to me_." I whispered.

He grinned and searched in his pockets for a condom, I was happy that he was prepared.

I hoped more than anything that things would be less awkward this time. The sensation he gave to me by now was better than the first time, I enjoyed how his hands caressed my breasts and that we became more curious, trying things differently. When he entered me, I couldn't help but feel a forceful urge to keep him in my arms forever.

"How many times will you call me each week?" I asked.

"Every day." He said and kissed me on the lips.

"Really?"

"I'll do my best to make it happen; hopefully my schedule won't be hectic." He countered.

"What are you going to study, aside from training?"

"I don't know, maybe major in English. I know you will go for journalism at Smithdale."

"Senior year is going to be horrible without you." I sighed, "Who will I go to prom?"

"I can't promise you anything, _but_ I want to visit time in time and maybe I could come with you to prom. Just don't go with any other guy, _you're mine_" He laughed.

"I won't..._Eli_?" I asked to gain his attention and he looked at me asking for me to continue. "I want to make a promise with you."

"What is it?"

"I...I promise to not fall for any other guy and wait for you, until you come back, and we can be together." I replied. I didn't want to come off as a possessive girlfriend, or make him think he had to be with me forever. I just wanted him to know, _I_ was his forever.

"_I swear the same thing_." He stated. I looked up to him, and his eyes were filled with sincerity, our chests pressed against each other and we kissed.

For me, I wanted the night to last forever. But minutes were taunting Eli and I, we never dared to look at what the time was and spent the entire night speaking and cuddling with each other. Until, the sun came out and we realized it was morning. We gasped at our absorbed conversation and rushed quickly to dress.

Eli's flight was scheduled at three in the afternoon, and it was seven in the morning.

"Oh, man! Your mom is going to be so pissed at me, for keeping you out so late." Eli groaned as he buckled his belt to his pants.

I clasped my bra on quickly and put on my t-shirt. "I'll think of something." I said, he gazed at me one more time.

"Staring is rude, _Elijah_."

"Sweet, merciful crap...I'm going to miss your body so fucking much Clare." He basically drooled.

"_Eli_." I said, warning him about the language he was using.

He smirked at me and gave a peck to me on the lips, we were walking to the hearse and he drove slowly, we arrived at the front of our houses. His eyes were fixated on the steering wheel and turned to look at me briefly.

"Are you coming to drop me off at the airport?"

I thought about it. I know what you're thinking, I should be there with him as an obligation of what a girlfriend should do, but in my mind I didn't want to go, I didn't want Eli to see me cry and breakdown, it would be awfully selfish, but I would have to control myself...

"Yeah, of course." I smiled faintly and kissed him one more time. "I'll be over your house in two hours, I just need to shower and...come up with an excuse for my mother."

"I love you." He said and allowed me to enter inside my house.

**

* * *

**

**Eli's ****P.O.V.**

"_Well, well, well,_ lookie what we have here CeCe! Our own boy sneaking into the house at seven in the morning, clothes is wrinkled, hair is messed up, and he's got that Goldsworthy sparkle in his eye. Yep." Bullfrog chuckled. "Someone got some real lovin' last night. _Good times, good times_." Bullfrog scratched his belly and looked over at my mother who was sitting on the couch looking at me.

"We were worried sick! Helen came over asking if her daughter was home already and Mr. Edwards was phoning all night!" CeCe said.

I shrugged casually at her.

"Where were you Elijah Goldsworthy, and don't you dare lie to me, the Edwards and I have known each other for years, they have beliefs and if you were-"

"Mom! Clare and I just spent our last night together, we lost track of time." I partially answered the full truth.

Until they saw the purity ring on my finger and CeCe sheepishly smiled, while Bullfrog let out a hearty laugh accompanied with a wink.

"Well! Damn time! We should celebrate! My son ain't a virgin, and here I thought he was gay!" Bullfrog laughed.

"Eli, never mind this, we have to make sure you have all your stuff ready to go. You're leaving in seven hours!" My mother waved her hands towards my room, gesturing me to make a move already.

_I know_, I know Clare and I will be separated for a very long time in seven hours. I know that when I leave I will have the never-ending **_doubt_** in my mind towards our relationship. _I know_.

* * *

"So, you need a hand, getting those suitcases in the car?" Adam was at my bedroom door.

"Damn time you came!" I walked over him and gave him a long hug.

"I love you man, no homo." Adam chuckled.

"I could say the same thing, machismo."

"Where's Clare?" Adam asked.

"Her mother got mad at her because we stayed out all night and is driving her to the airport herself, she probably thinks I'm corrupting her daughter."

"Is that so?" Adam said and walked to my suitcases grabbing one and helping me put them in the car.

We stood outside and I saw that Clare's car was gone, meaning that her mom, being punctual and all drove her to the airport, which is by far the stupidest thing, considering we live next to each other.

"Well, we good?" Bullfrog asked.

"Yeah, I guess that's everything." I sighed; my mother rushed over to my side and hugged me tightly.

"It feels like you were a baby yesterday, now you're moving to Spain all by yourself!" She laughed dryly.

Adam laughed awkwardly and we got inside the car.

* * *

**Clare's ****P.O.V.**

"Where did Eli take you last night?" My mother asked for the hundredth time as she focused her eyes on the road.

"We went to a church and _talked_." I replied

"Isn't he atheist?"

"Well, we didn't necessarily go inside the church, we were _by _the church. Can you please explain to me why, you didn't let me go with Eli and his family?"

"I guess that's a punishment you deserve for staying past your curfew. Your father was worried sick."

"Since when does he care? Ever since you two divorced, he's been prancing around town with his assistant and kept me out of the picture." I scoffed.

"He really does love you, he just distances himself because..._because of me_. Don't hold a grudge against him; you should listen to what Pastor Dave preached every Sunday, forgiveness is the path to salvation."

I stared out the window, wanting to avoid the subject. I truly missed my dad, and sometimes he would invite me to stay over his condo, but he was always so nonchalant about it. He was the parent who always had my side in my darkest moments. Now that he wasn't around so much, Eli became my…I guess you could say, savior. And Eli leaving was something I had to get used to, but I know he will come back someday.

"I'm going to miss Eli, mom." I said abruptly.

"It's not goodbye forever, you'll see him again someday."

"But, what if he forgets about me, finds another girl, I really lo-"

"We're here Clare." My mother interrupted me and we walked inside the airport. I was confused as to why each time the subject of my love for Eli was mentioned she ignored me, because believe me this happened other times.

We waited patiently at the entrance until we saw Eli and his family walking towards us. CeCe waved happily at my mother, and Bullfrog gave a polite nod. While Adam walked over to me and gave me a friendly hug, how I longed to kiss Eli, just not in front of our parents.

"So Clare, my man here has been moping the entire ride thanks to you." Adam said.

I laughed dryly at his comment and looked over at Eli, he seemed, happy.

"You excited?" I asked.

"Just think...in a few hours I'll be in Spain!"He yelped and looked around the airport.

"Eli! We have to go through security and checks! Your plane is leaving soon sweetie, you've already said your goodbyes to your father and I, say goodbye to Adam and Clare." CeCe said.

Oh no. Not goodbye.

Eli walked over to my mother and gave her a hug, "May you have a safe trip, and work hard for that dream of yours, I hope to see you in a year or so."

"Thank you; you've always been a very sweet woman, take care." He smiled

Then he went to Adam.

"_Dude_."

"_Dude_, take care and uh- you better get me an autograph from Villa and Messi, that's all I want for Christmas. Take care man, call me." Adam simply said and gave him a long hug and fist pump, before his eyes got watery.

Then he came to me.

"Let's leave them alone." My mother and CeCe said, as they walked away.

Our eyes were focused on the linoleum floor beneath us.

My heart was racing and he was the only thing on my mind right now. At that moment, the memories I shared with him were rushing back. The moments I lived with him have gone by so fast, and now? Now, he's leaving. I felt my throat tightening and my bottom lip trembling. I fidgeted with the bottom of my dress. And he looked at me with those green eyes.

"If you ever feel lonely, or you need someone to talk to...you know the drill" I said.

"I'll...um...-_ahem-_...you know I'll be thinking about you, all the time. So, don't do anything stupid when I'm gone. I won't be here to protect you and, just take care." He said awkwardly.

"_You too_. I just hope, you'll be happy and you do well." I smiled, and tears were brimming in my eye.

_Don't be selfish, don't let him see you cry._

"Clare. This isn't goodbye. Think of it like, summer camp, or something. It'll be for a little while."

"You're so optimistic." I giggled.

"With you, always."

"Just, don't forget about me, okay?" I whispered into his ear as we embraced into hug, and our heads rested on each other's shoulders.

"I swear, you ask the most ridiculous questions sometimes." He chuckled.

I inhaled a shaky deep breath, feeling the tears coming.

"Don't cry. I hate to see you cry, you're making me feel bad." He replied and I saw that his eyes were being filled with tears.

"I'm not sad. I'm happy, that you're going to make your dreams come true. I need you to try your best at everything Eli, for me."

"Clare, when I come back-"

_"Passenger, flight 56, Spain is boarding."_

We were interrupted.

"I guess that's my cue." He smirked

"Call me when you get there?" I asked.

"I love you so fucking much, don't you ever forget that." He replied and grabbed my palms, pulling me into a gigantic hug.

I sobbed quietly on his shoulder and gave him a final long kiss.

"I love you!" I yelped through my quiet sobs.

He exited through the gates.

I waited after he left and looked over at the windows, until I saw that his plane took off.

**_Why did this feel like goodbye forever?_**

Then when I saw the plane go into the sky, all hell broke loose, and I couldn't stop crying, Adam came behind me and pulled me into a hug.

"He's coming back someday, don't worry." He answered.

"W-what if he doesn't, I have no control of the future." I muttered.

Adam looked at me and smiled, "As cheesy as this sounds, he left the thing he loves the most here, and he'll come back for it, can you guess what that is?"

"What?" I sniffled through tears.

"Morty!" Adam laughed, causing me to giggle. "Just messing with you Edwards, _it's you_."

"Then why do I feel, as if he's going to be gone for **_more than a year_**?"

Adam didn't reply to my question and hugged me until, my eyes were dry.

I felt that a part of me felt empty, as if a huge weight came off my shoulders. Yet it was a weight filled with drives to the park, kisses under the moonlight, caresses each afternoon, sarcastic comments, and loving stares. Gone. The way I felt wasn't completely empty, but it's as if my love was stained onto the inconvenient plane, Eli boarded. It was summer, and so many I had spent with him, now this would be a first without him. I felt numb, almost peaceful as I walked to my car, and anger filled my mind. I was reclaiming a lost hope, and I felt so lonely now that Eli left. I lost so much with him leaving, and it's been twenty minutes his flight left, I'm really pathetic.

"Clare, are you alright?" My mother said as she drove into the road.

"Just, let me cry." I sobbed.

Without a doubt, I **_was_** happy.

**_Was_**. Not anymore.

* * *

_**THREE CHAPTERS LEFT! AND AN EPILOGUE!**_

**Spoiler **for next chapter: Long distance relationships **never** work, trust me, I know, personal experience. That's all I'm gonna say.

The next chapters will be each VERY long! _Maybe_ each like the size of this one.

Update in two weeks, or less! I have TONS of schoolwork, MARCH MADNESS!

**_REVIEW!_**


	22. 12th Grade: This is it

**Wow!** I just would like to say thank you so much for your reviews! I got so happy seeing that some of you enjoy this story, your support means the a great amount to me!

I feel that you guys should be the judge of this chapter, I didn't like it too much, but it's the best I can give. :D

**Towards the end of this chapter, it shall be told in a third person's point of view. **

**

* * *

**

Eli's P.O.V.

_________"Keep your eyes on the ball Goldsworthy!"_

_"Faster!"_

_"To the right, pass it to Esteban!"_

_"Go, go, go!"_

He shoots, he scores.

"Great job Eli, keep that up and we might enter you officially into the team in a couple of months." Coach said, a clipboard firmly attached to his grip, with an encouraging grin plastered on his face.

"Thanks, I've been really working hard for it." I answered, gazing at the lush green field surrounding us, taking in the emptiness of hundreds of seats I longed to be filled with fans I hoped to have one day.

"I can tell, so keep it up." He smugly smiled and left.

I headed to the showers.

The walls were cloaked with white tiles and some guys were flocking around, bragging on their plans this weekend, and obsessing over anything but soccer, while others were goofing off and smacking each other with their towels, releasing hearty chuckles.

"Ouch! The rookie is on fire!" Esteban grinned at me. While the other guys laughed at his comment.

Esteban was a recruited player just like me out of the other six. He was who I shared a dorm with, at times he was the Spanish version of Adam I missed back home.

"Dang, Eli that was a serious pass you did back there." Another one of the guys said, I just shrugged casually to the thought and stripped off my clothes, heading for a cold shower.

It's been nine months since I left Canada, and practice has been crazy. I was also studying a master's degree in English when I wasn't out on the field. My schedule was work, train, study, and sleep all the time, and it was impossible for me to call Clare sometimes.

_Clare_.

_When wasn't she on my mind?_ It's unbearable being without her.

I could only call her at nighttime, since she barely gets out of school when I can, not to mention that it's six hours over here ahead than in Canada. Then when I did, I was always tired and sometimes she would have homework. It was difficult having to live without her kisses, touch, that amazing way we would make love to each other. I, as a guy was having trouble dealing with being alone and being paranoid all the time about _my Clare_, sometimes Adam would tell me she went to those Christian Retreat camping trips with some of the guys from school, I trusted her with all my heart, I just didn't trust those hormonal buffoons. To say that she wasn't here was a distraction for me, anything I would do, my mind would wander off to her blue eyes and pink lips. It was bothersome too, not being able to focus directly on something without her in my mind. Just the other day, I was at the market buying some food for myself and the strawberry section just send me into a long daydream over Clare, _her hair smells like that on strawberry shampoo_. I also realized I wasn't able to go back home in time for Clare's prom realizing that possible debuts into the actual team were coming soon in the summer. She didn't take the news to well but she understood, as always.

_"I understand...I could go with one of my girlfriends."_

She was missing out on a lot of stuff because of me sometimes I felt that-

"She's hot!" One of the guys yelled out of the lockers.

I turned off the faucet and walked over to see what all the chaos was. Only to find that all of the recruits were huddling near my stuff.

"Hey? What's going on?" I wrapped the towel around my waist and walked over to them looking at something of mine.

"I thought you said you didn't want a girl around here?" One of the teammates said.

"I don't." I argued.

"Then who's this hot chick?" Another one gestured to the picture of Clare that fell out of my gym bag. _Is it weird I carry a picture of her everywhere around with me?_

"That's my girlfriend." I replied and snatched the photo calmly away from him, I smiled at the picture. It was that one day I took Clare to the park, she looked so gorgeous in her yellow Sunday dress, I couldn't resist and take a picture of her.

"Oh. _Sorry_, I tripped over your stuff and tried to pick up the mess, then I found it." He said and walked back to his business.

"It's fine." I mumbled.

David, another team mate looked at me, "So, how long have you been with her?"

"About three years." I smirked.

"_Wow_, and she was okay with you leaving and all?" He asked as he dressed into his shirt and pants.

"Sure, she was a bit sad, but we're still together." I replied.

"Have you visited her? You've been here for nine months haven't you?" He raised his eyebrows.

"_I can't_, money is tight with my folks, and I'm studying for a degree when I'm not here at practice."

He nodded understandingly to my reasons and paused. "I had a girlfriend back in the States, you know. I came here to Spain two years ago, to pursue this dream. I never got recruited, just have a family friend here. I worked my ass off until I got recognized." He continued.

"You still with her?" I asked. A part of me, hoped dearly he would say yes, reassuring that this long distance thing with Clare and I would work out.

"_We were_, for a year after I left...then communication weakened, she was living her life and I was working hard for my dreams. She was also feeling left out, because she couldn't go to parties, dances, or to the movies because she felt guilty for me, _the relationship and all_. I felt bad for her...and we just broke up. _Best favor _I did for her, she was missing out because of me. Now she's living her dream and I'm living mine." He sighed.

"Oh." I only spoke out, dissapointed at the response.

"'Lil man, I'll give you advice for you and your girl, 'cause I've been in that situation too. With all the stuff you have on your plate, you won't be leaving Spain for a long time, _trust me_. _And,_ if she's your age, all I can say is that these years are the highlight of her life. Prom and graduation ain't fun when you're in a relationship far away." He continued.

"We're different." I scoffed at his comment and walked out of the stadium with my gym bag hanging out of my shoulder.

I tried to erase the doubt in my mind and focused on waiting for Esteban, since he was my ride back to the dorm.

The ride was filled with another conversation I had with him about today's match and Coach's plans for the both of us. I arrived home and headed for the phone, thinking about calling Clare.

"Dude, your midterm is tomorrow you should hit the books." Esteban reminded me.

"I almost forgot, _great_, another all-nighter." I groaned.

I haven't communicated with Clare in two weeks, since she was finally spending more time with her father, and I with my schoolwork and priorities. Anyone could see that our calls were becoming more distant.

Love wasn't based only on an emotional connection, it was physical too. The longing and desire to hold her in my arms and kiss her was torture, the past would come to mind and how I wished I lived those days, being grateful she was by my side. The distance was slowly tearing down our love bit by bit as well, as if it were a thin piece of paper, cracks were here and there, crumpled in the corner if you may say, but **_still together_**. The last time we spoke she had to hang up early since her mother was calling her to do chores, before I could even say I love you, the line went dead.

"What are thinking about?" Esteban asked as he threw himself on the bed.

"_Nothing_." I lied.

"I may not be as smart as you, but I can tell when a dude's hurting over a girl." He continued, rushing his hands back and forth threw his sandy brown hair.

"No, I'm good. Thanks though." I sighed and returned to my book, memorizing the information.

I wasn't really the kind of guy that would want to talk his problems out with a friend. I just missed Clare, and sometimes I felt like I needed to give it up.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

_Why won't he call? He said he would. Maybe he's out with a girl, that English partner of his, Sophia._

Oh god, what if he's cheating on me?

"Clare! He's not going to call, give it up." Alli said to me as she pulled me out of my train of thoughts.

"Alli, it's been two weeks we have not spoken to each other." I groaned.

"Maybe, he's really busy."

As much as I wanted to reassure myself and believe everything that Alli was saying, I didn't. It was a disturbing sensation that ran through my thoughts every second: wondering what Eli was doing and most importantly with whom. I wondered if I was ever on his mind, if he cared what I did today or what I was feeling at the moment the same way I did for him. Every night before I went to sleep, daydreams and hopes of finally seeing Eli again and him holding me in my arms came to mind. I may be pathetic or so, but sometimes I would go to my bedroom window and look at the sky, the same way Eli told me to, and I would smile softly at the stars and moon knowing he was looking at the same thing I was, it was the only thing I found in common with him during a time like this.

"You need to stop moping and call him yourself, don't be pathetic" Alli whined.

"_I know_. But, he said he would call me when he had time, and if he hasn't called it's because he has more important stuff to do."

"More important than his girlfriend?" Alli sighed.

I frowned at the comment and was about to speak when my mother came in the room. With the phone in her hand, and she smiled happily. I was hoping dearly it was Eli, when-

"Yes Randall! I'll tell her to open it now." My mother chimed into the phone, apparently speaking with my father. I smiled a bit at the fact that they were both getting along and saw that my mother held a letter in her hand.

"Mom, is it..." I drawled.

"Your college application from Smithdale!" My mother squealed.

I looked over at Alli and saw her grinning widely at me, Alli had already received her application letter and was accepted. It was our dream to go to college together, not to mention Smithdale was a very prestigious private university in the area, which only the best of the best got enrolled in. I've always been a straight A student and was more than confident I made it.

My hands shaked at the anticipation and I gradually teared down the letter, I opened the letter after a second try, and looked over at my mother ready to tell my father the answer through the phone, and Alli who was crossing her fingers.

_Dear Ms. Edwards,_

_I am sorry to report that, after full and careful consideration, the Admissions committee at Smithdale University has denied your admission, to our institution._

I stared at the letter in disbelief. I couldn't comprehend, after so much work and dedication, _rejected_. I didn't even bother to continue the rest, as I felt a bullet through the brain sensation surge within my emotions.

"Well?" My mother and Alli smiled.

I attempted to seem as if it didn't bother me, and let out a shaky grin. "You can't always get what you want right?" I breathed.

"You don't mean..." Alli shook her head in disbelief.

"Well, there are always other colleges. There's still Toronto U." I attempted to not cry.

_"Did she get accepted?" _I heard my father's voice on the phone. My mother gave me a sympathetic look and saw her walk out of the room to talk with my father.

"Clare, I-"

"No, Alli. It's okay, this stuff happens." I sighed.

"_This ruins everything_. How are we going to be together?" Alli paused and looked at me, seeing the disappointment flash in my eyes, before she spoke again, "Do you need anything?" She reached over and gave me a strong hug.

"I'd like to be alone, not to be rude, but I need some time to think." I stiffly sighed.

"Okay. Call me when you need me."

I smiled back at her and waited until she exited the room.

A deep breath escaped my mouth and I rubbed my forehead frustratingly. Numb at the rejection, and I sunk into my pillow crying at the realization. My mother walked in the room, but I ordered to be alone.

I really needed Eli.

* * *

**Two weeks later:**

Eli paced in his room back and forth, the stress harming his mind. _It was all too much_, and he knew that the person he loved the most was getting hurt in the end. He managed to call his mother, father, and Adam in the past two weeks. But, not being able to call Clare in a month was out of line, and sadly, he knew that, but every time he dialed Clare's first three numbers, his heart beated erratically and his fingers gained a mind of its own and pressed the END button. He was scared to death, speaking with her, realizing that this long distance relationship was becoming out of hand and falling apart bit by bit in a rapid pace.

Clare drowned herself in self pity and frowns each day. Her rejection at her aspired university was damaging, but she luckily got accepted into Toronto U. It was a good university close to home, but the fact that Alli would be a bit more distant from her each day was an unbearable idea for her. The separation of her parents, lack of Eli's support, and few friends made Clare feel isolated. The suffocation, however, she received from isolating herself in activities she couldn't engage in, such as being stuck at home on a Friday night.

Going to beach parties with Alli as well as dances were out of the picture, considering it was impossible going to a social event without having a guy hit on her and start feeling guilty for the sake of Eli and her relationship with him. _Then_, doubt crossed her mind multiple of times. She very well knew that Eli managed to call both his parents and Adam, which was a slap in the face to her. It made her feel unimportant and wonder if Eli moved on and found another girl. A prettier, smarter, skinnier, overall, _better_ girl than herself. The fact that she couldn't go dress shopping for prom with the rest of her friends made her even more upset, knowing she wouldn't have a date while everyone else did. Sure, guys asked her, but she remained faithful to Eli. She still had her hope and her love.

* * *

After endless sleepless nights and the advice of his fellow friends and a five hour talk with Adam on the phone. Eli reached a conclusion. It broke his heart, but he knew it was both definite and for the best.

It was May, a week before prom and three weeks before graduation.

Clare stayed in at home watching the sunset outside her window. It was a Friday night and a weekend was strongly craved by her.

She for the first time, took her eyes away from the phone, went down stairs and nonchalantly fixed herself a bowl of cereal, after packing her duffle bag, finally agreeing to spend an entire week with her much needed father at his condo. Her mother went out for a little shopping, and Clare sighed at the loneliness. Alli was out with Drew at a party Bianca and Jenna were throwing, one Clare was not welcomed, as well as both Julia and K.C., who both lived with Julia's parents now taking care of their son, Kevin.

Eli looked at his phone and closed his eyes securely, ready to dial. Esteban walked over to him and knew what was about to happen.

"I could dial the number for you. If you're that nervous." Esteban offered.

Eli nodded at the gesture and handed Esteban a small post-it with Clare's number.

After, the much avoided buttons were pressed, Esteban gave Eli a quick pat on the shoulder and exited the dorm to give him his privacy. "Good luck." He sighed.

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Ring._

_Ring. _

_Ring._

_She's not going to answer, maybe it's for the best, some other time he would b-_

"Hello." The most softest voice echoed, the same one he hasn't heard in **two** months. His heart ached at the sound and he rubbed his sweaty palms around his knees, letting out a shaky breath.

"Hey." He simply replied.

"Eli?" Clare squeaked.

She smiled at the sound of his voice and was infuriated for him for not calling her, now out of all times.

"Why haven't you called me?" She snapped, distressed.

"I was busy." He dully answered.

"No you weren't. I know you've called CeCe and Adam." She whined impatiently.

"I've been thinking then." He said, and he felt his heart tighten.

Clare paused at the tone of his voice, and remained quiet for him to continue, seeing that he didn't she became a bit more irritated.

"_What's wrong with you_? I've been waiting for your call and you don't even think about me, I've missed you." She calmly ordered for an answer. The anger in her voice was evident, however.

"I'm sorry. I really am."

"No you're not." She felt disappointed at him.

"I've been have stuff to think about, really." He repeated honestly, Eli rubbed his temple stressed in the situation he was, and walked back and forth from his bed to the door.

"About what? _Talk to me_. Come on, we never hide anything from each other." She grew worried that maybe she had overreacted to this whole scenario.

"_Clare_." He groaned, not wanting to go into details.

"**Talk to me**." She repeated, meaning business.

A deep breath was exhaled, and Clare felt her eyes twitch at the mood of Eli from the phone, _it was distant_.

"What else, Clare? What else could it be? We're already arguing and I haven't even said the situation yet. I can't even see your face!" He yelled, and shook Clare's sanity.

"What the hell am I supposed to do about it? _You're there and I'm here_. You never call, or try to communicate with me." She croaked. Clare never cursed and the conversation's tone took on a different turn.

"That's the problem." Eli breathed forcefully, and gritted his teeth, waiting for her response.

"Eli, _don't bring this up_... I'm really happy you're doing great thing and you're living you dream. But we knew the reality of this situation when you left. Don't you dare complain now." She emphasized at the situation, they both brought on themselves and hoped to overcome.

"_Clar_e, I'm nothing but a huge weight on your shoulders, you're missing out because of me." He paused. "For Christ's sake you're home on a Friday night, locked up. You aren't having fun and you'll be going to college soon, and...I'm not coming back for a long time." His grip on the phone tightened, the same way his throat did and tone.

Clare blinked her eyes at the fact that she would have to _suffer_ more time without seeing her needed boyfriend. Now.

"Don't say that, there has to be something I could do, _we could do_." She felt tears forming in her eyes.

"_Come here then_." Eli offered as a question, more than a statement.

"To Spain?" Clare whispered shakily.

"_Where else_? You can come here in the summer." Eli shrugged at his answer. His eyes scrunched and his mouth slightly opened, gaping softly to wait for her answer.

"Eli, I have college here. _What am I going to do over there_? You can barely call me, what attention are you going to give me there?" Clare stated in disbelief.

"We'll be with each other, that's all that matters. Smithdale can wait." Eli argued.

Clare blinked back tears at his answer, she then realized her and Eli were becoming strangers overtime. Her boyfriend didn't even know she got rejected from her top pick for University.

"I don't even know anymore." Clare sighed and sat down on her couch, stared off into empty space, realizing where this was heading.

"_Me neither_." Eli said in a tone lacking both emotion and the hope he previously held in this relationship.

A long silence continued until Eli spoke. " I think it's best if we..." He stopped there, his heart aching at the words he tried to form and his mind fogged off.

"_**Say it**_." Clare ordered, her voice was cold and shaky. She grabbed a pillow and squeezed it softly, waiting for him to continue. As small tears began running down her face gradually.

"I think it's best if I hang up now." Eli breathed.

"When will you call me?" Clare felt her bottom lip tremble, hoping he would say next week, tomorrow, in a year, _any time_.

"Huh? Eli, when?" She choked on a sob, waiting for him to say, _"Tomorrow, my love."_

Eli didn't respond, and closed his eyes securely. "I really do care about you Clare." Eli had tears slipping down his eyes, and felt his breathing drop slowly.

Clare brought her hand to her temple and gripped it onto the roots of her hair, and shook her head, breathing out through her nose.

"_Hold on a second_, you made me a promise to love me forever. _Remember that_? There's got to be a solution...t-to work past this." Clare kept on saying and felt her mouth running dry.

"_What the hell did I know_? You said it yourself, I'm here and y-you're there." Eli continued, his voice was filled with frustration, tasting the salty tears slip out of his eyes.

Clare gulped at his answer and attempted a little smile, "I can't imagine my life without you, without your voice, o-or y-your touch. A-and...Eli, don't do this. _**please**_." She cried and sniffled a tear here and there.

Eli felt his mind erupt, a sadness lingering in his vocal chords, and shook his head rapidly in disbelief at what he was doing. "_Stop_. No, trust me this is for the best, _for you_. **For us**." A hiccup escaped his lips. "I can't go on like this, having you on my conscious all the time, waiting for me, _when it'll never happen_. I don't know when I'm coming back, I have school during vacation and this is all becoming too much. I never wanted to hurt you, ever." His voice raised and he felt the tears flowing rapidly down his cheeks.

"I-I, **_no_**. It can't be **_it_** for us. Eli, _say something_." Clare felt her eyebrows scrunch and her hands losing grip of the phone, the world became nothing in this situation, for all she cares, it could end in this instant.

"_**This is it**_."

And as quickly as he could, he ended the call. Ran his hands frantically across his face and gripped his hair. Angry, and heartbroken. What he would do, to go back in time and stop all of this. A wretched scream echoed the room and he sobbed into his hands.

_And she_, she let the phone drop on the floor and take short breaths of air, in and out. While her eyes cascaded into a red blush, and her nose run like a river. She felt empty. Her mouth had no words to speak, and all was lost. She just kept jamming the pillow to her forehead, and knocked down her mother's porcelain figuirine doll to the ground, she pounded her fists into the soft cushions of the couch and felt her breathing grow heavy and her heart aching more than ever, a sour pain came within her chest

* * *

**Three Weeks Later:**

Clare, a respected valedictorian looked at the caps being thrown into the air and remained still, watching Alli and other friends jump in joy of their graduation. Seeing Clare smile, became rare. Her father grimaced at his daughter's heartbreak and her mother supported her to the similar feeling she now shared with her. Everything was crumbling in her eyes, it didn't matter anymore that Eli was the new number twenty-three on Barcelona's team.

It mattered however, that she had to see his face in magazines, news broadcasts, and hear his name shoutedm, praised every second from his hometown. His name was emphasized strongly a few seconds ago, considering he was a fellow Degrassi panther. Also living next door to your boyfriend's parents was a burden to her process of getting over him.

She still cried to sleep, and stayed emotionless at each thing she would do.

One thing was for sure though.

Clare Edwards never hated soccer until now.

* * *

**A/N:**

I see some serious hate here! Sound familiar?

2 CHAPTERS LEFT! Oh my, how will it all end?

Thank you for reading :3


	23. University and BFC: Time Flies By

**A/N: **So, I am sorry that I didn't update last Saturday, but I had to go to school to work on a project, after I was lazy, not gonna lie.

Your reviews left me smiling for a really long time, I apologize I never intended to make anyone cry, when I read it to myself I didn't feel that it was sad, but your opinion is more important than mine, you guys are really supportive and too good for your own good. I like, am seriously in love with you all and the feedback you give me, because honestly I believe some of you guys deserve it more than I do, I creep on some of yor stories and I become mindblown, practically shocked that I am sometimes on some of your guys's favorites list. Thank you!

Anyways, enjoy thus chapter...or hate it, it's a free country :3

Maybe an update this weekend? Ohoho! :)

**Their ages are both 19 in this chapter.**

_

* * *

_

_2 years later:_

**Clare's P.O.V.**

_"Miss Edwards?" _

_"I think she's asleep!" _

_"Wakey-wakey, Clare!"_

I heard whispers echoing my name, and a soft poke touched my neck.

I was asleep, in class. _Oh, god_. The stares of people were a contributing factor to the red blush cascading across my cheeks when I rose my head up. "_Sorry_." I whispered nervously.

Studying for mid-terms and homework has been the death of me lately.

A serious glare and disappointed pout were being greeted to me by my professor. "I'd appreciate it if you were awake, but seeing that you find my class boring, must mean you know the material _right_? Very well then, care to elaborate on the literary analysis of the watch mentioned in _The Tell Tale Heart_, Clare?" My professor asked, I cringed at the mention of that tale, the one Eli and I loved so much.

_Stop it. Stop thinking about him._

"_Well_...the watch represents a visual and auditory representation of time, for example the watch both, watches the time and tells tales of the time?" I fidgeted nervously in my seat, avoiding the gazes of all students looking at me as if I was an idiot.

My professor gave me a quick thumbs-up and nodded his head, returning to the board and continuing his lesson.

"_Nice save, Clare_." Michael, the guy sitting next to me whispered. His brown hair drooped behind his ears as his pearly white smile, beneath his hazel eyes encouraged me to smile at my correct answer.

Class ended and I walked out, only for Michael to catch up next to me, "_Hey Clare_, some of the guys back in Kennedy Hall are throwing a party tonight, we're watching tonight's big playoff game of Barcelona against Arsenal. You should come; there will be food and good music." He placed his hand on my shoulder and grinned softly.

Two things reminding me of Eli in a day. _Great_.

"Uh, I actually don't like soccer, so..." I drawled.

"You could just hang with _me_- I uh mean other people, _you know_? Have fun, before mid-terms start." He tried to persuade me, but the thought of watching Eli's face on a plasma-screen was something I have been avoiding for the past year. After crying rivers and rejecting tons of guys, I accepted being single, and hearing from the news and other friends:

_'Elijah Goldsworthy, bright future ahead at such an early age.'_

_'Soccer's hunkiest players of the year.'_

_'Another stunning victory led by #23, Goldsworthy.'_

"Well, I don't think so." I cringed at my words, hoping he would let the subject go.

"Nice try, come on, it'll be fun. I won't stop bugging you until you say yes." He chuckled, and I laughed awkwardly back at him.

"Sure, _why not_." I replied, and he nodded before giving me a hug. He winked at me before he walked off to the rest of the campus.

I walked back to my dorm, one I shared alone, considering my roommate had already graduated, and set my books down, getting ready to take a long hot shower, then my phone rang.

I already knew who that would be on the other line, the only person besides my parents who called me, "Hey." I breathed.

"So, I just got back from calculus, totally aced my test! Mid-terms are over for me, how about you?" Alli asked.

"Not there yet, but I've already been studying."

"I have no plans this weekend; maybe we can go back to Degrassi and hang out with our families? I haven't seen you in a month, Clare."

"That sounds good; I'll have to tell my dad and mom though too, they've been wanting to see me." I continued.

"What are you doing tonight?" Alli mumbled, I could tell she was eating.

"I'm uh; I'm going to a party." I stalled.

"Ooh! And what type of occasion are we talking about, frat, keg, celebration, sport-"

"Just a couple of people gathering together to watch the match...between, Barcelona and Arsenal." I sighed, and tried to ignore the hurt in my voice. The memories fogging in my thoughts and Eli's face appearing and disappearing, repeating the cycle.

"You, don't mean, Barcelona as in the team E-"

"_Yeah_, that's the one. The guy asking me wouldn't take no for an answer."

"O-okay then, I _um_...just distract yourself from the game, talk with others while you're there." Alli stuttered nervously, why was she cautious?

"Sure silly, but I have to take a shower, see you this weekend then?" I asked.

"If you need to talk or call me whenever, anytime, do so..._okay_?" Alli said finally and hung up.

I shook my head at her weird behavior, and a part of me felt giddy. I would see Eli's face tonight, but at the same time I wanted to run away and smash all the televisions on campus so I wouldn't have to see his appearance. It was bizarre, after some time I accepted the fact he broke up with me and decided to let it go. Yet my feelings for him lingered on, the sensation was as equally frustrating as heart-breaking. I blinked my eyes feeling the emptiness inside me, mixed emotions flowing through my veins, and my eyes stinging at the threat of tears longing to form. _I still love him_.

_Why did he have to end things_? Sometimes I look back and wish I would have said yes to going to Spain to be with him, regretting the tone I used with him last when I spoke to him, and I still wondered with an enormous passion filling my lungs and the pit of my stomach, secreting out of my lifeless brain, i-if, if Eli still l-loved me.

_What I would give to know_, if he ever thought of my face, my voice, the gentle touch I gave to him whenever he placed feather-like kissed around me.

I've never forgotten him. I remember Eli always in every star that sets in the sky, when the night is dark, when the rain falls, when the moon rises and the sun goes down. _At every second of every minute, in every hour_. And I feel so hurt by the fact that I can't control my feelings wishing I had moved on by now.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

"Alright, we've practiced for this a while now. You know the drill, so focus on the game and nothing else." Coach huffed and patted each of us on the back, before we walked into the halls, stretching our legs and muscles for the game.

"Eli, watch out for the referee, he has favorites. Just get on his good side, 'kay." Esteban said to me, I nodded in response.

I took a peek out to the stands and saw fans swarming the stadium like fishes in the sea. Many held posters with my name on it, and I couldn't help but feel happy and elated.

I took my cell phone and sent a text to both my parents and Adam that the game was about to start. I bent my knees, feeling the adrenaline rush through me the same way at each game.

"Ready to lead us to another goal, Goldsworthy?" Another teammate called.

"_Hopefully_, don't let it get to our heads." I replied.

And out I went into the field, passing by reporters and fans cheering my name and asking for questions.

The game began.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"Shut up! It's starting!" A guy yelled and glued his eyes to the screen as he turned up the volume.

I licked my lips and tapped my finger, until I felt Michael place his hand next to mine and smile at me. I smiled back, awkwardly surprised, wanting to reject his touch.

I looked at the screen and searched for anything but Eli, I pulled my hand away from Michael and rubbed it against my thigh feeling the sweat release from the nerves shivering my body in a great apprehension. I gaped softly and kept my eyes fixated, feeling my heart race fast up to the point as if it were going to pop out of my chest.

_There he was. Eli._

His hair fell gracefully, framing his more mature face and stiff jaw line. His serious look kept both his lips and eyes pursed, being highlighted by the stadium lights. His body grew more muscular and his legs were rigid being shown underneath those blue shorts. His chest heaved gradually as he jogged back and forth across the field, his eyes giving an intense stare at no one else but the ball.

_Why did he have to get more handsome?_

A pass was made, and there he dodged back and forth passing it to others, lifting his knees up high and shoulders brought up stiffly. In the next couple of seconds, he's near the goal and a team mate passes him the ball.

He shoots, he scores.

The crowd goes wild, Michael laughs, girls in the room cheer, and others just applause.

I stay quiet and feel a lump form in my throat and a soft grin full of pride for Eli, creep up on the side of my face.

Eli smirks. _That smirk_, the one he gave me, and the camera zooms in on his face.

"Oh my _God-sworthy_!" Megan, a blonde in the room gasps at Eli's face.

"He is so hot!" Pamela, another girl agrees.

I feel my head quiver and lip twitch into a frown, knowing that there are gazillions of girls that feel this way about Eli, whenever he comes on screen. _For goodness gracious_, girls in bikinis were at the game having the name 'ELI' written on their bare stomachs, in Barcelona's team colors.

"This is why girls shouldn't watch sports; it's only for a hot guy they get a hot-flash for." Brandon, another boy grunted.

"Shut the fuck up." Megan snarled and threw a playful sock at him, obviously joking around with him.

"Goldsworthy is a cocky bastard if you ask me; all the other guys barely get any attention ever since he joined. Probably some stuck-up jackass who had rich folks to pay for soccer lessons when he was young." Another guy muttered.

I growled at the comment, Eli was never cocky, nor did he have private lessons to get this talent, he worked so hard for it.

"Something wrong, Clare?" Michael laughed, seeing that he heard my growl.

"I, um, I think the chip-dip gave me a sore throat." I lied.

"I only like him 'cause he's Canadian just like us. Representing! _Yee, dawg_!" A shirtless guy in the room hollered.

Others nodded and went back to watching the game and munching on the chips and pizza.

The game, it ended with Barcelona winning, one goal made by Eli of course, and the other by Lionel Messi.

After that, the camera zoomed in on a very beautiful, skinny girl. With light brown hair, green eyes, and full red lips. Her face was caked by too much make-up, yet that complimented her eyes very well. She was sitting in one of the private stands and kept a serious face the whole time, until the camera faced in on her and she smiled.

The subtitle under her read _'Olivia Kortaj'_.

"Who's that sexy lady?" Brandon laughed.

"I heard that she is Goldsworthy's girlfriend, she always comes to his games. She's like a Spanish model or something." Pamela answered.

I felt my heart shatter, and my mind go into a phase of pure vertigo. I gulped the previous lump in my throat and ignored everything else in the moment.

_Girlfriend?_

"Oh yeah, they've been together for like a month now, right?" Brandon continued.

"Clare, you sure you're alright?" Michael asked again, turning his full attention towards me.

I let out a small gasp for air, and felt tears rising. "I think that the sore-throat became heartburn...I got to go, thanks for the invite." I quickly breathed and rushed out of there as soon as possible.

I rushed back to my dorm and shut the door, too tired and shocked to walk over to my bed, I slid my back down to the ground and stared off into empty space. Feeling nothing but hearing the word's 'Goldsworthy's girlfriend.' repeat in my mind over and over again.

_Déjà vu_.

I sighed and knew it was foolish for me cry, it had been two years; it was only a matter of time before he moved on. I just didn't expect it to be so abrupt, and with someone so beautiful, so successful, _so perfect_.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

After taking a shower in the lockers, I exited out to a flock of reporters waiting to interview me.

_"Eli, great game!"_

_"Olivia came by, she says she's really proud of you, and tonight you two shall celebrate!"_

_"Over here, Eli!"_

"Hey everyone, thank you so much for the support. I appreciate it a lot. I'd like to answer questions but I am in a hurry, excuse me." I answered to them and was led by my bodyguards to my ride back home.

"Excuse me, Mr. Goldsworthy?" A man asked from the corner of my eye, I was really in a hurry but decided that if it was a fan, they deserved my time of day.

My bodyguards tensed at the man's presence, he was short and middle aged wearing a Barcelona shirt.

"Excuse me sir, you are not allowed in this area." Carl, my bodyguard firmly said.

"It's okay." I stepped in. "What can I do for you?" I asked the fan.

"My daughter here," A little girl at the age of six or seven appeared behind him. "She's a really big fan of yours, can you please give us an autograph." He asked nervously.

"Of course, any fan of mine deserves it and more." I grinned and bent down to look at the little girl.

What struck me was her eyes. They were blue as a crystal glass framed by an azure pool. _Clare_.

I stared into those eyes, the same ones that looked identical to Clare's when we were younger. The ones I once saw revolting, and churned at. _Now_, I missed them and croaked at the sight.

"What's your name, huh?" I asked her.

"Lucy." She mumbled.

I patted her on the head, gave them both an autograph, and took pictures with them.

"You have very pretty eyes, Lucy." I smiled. She gave a toothy grin and stumbled back to her father's arms, looking at me with gratitude.

"Thank you so much, you're such an amazing player." He cooed and walked away, satisfied.

I got into the car, and faced my head against the window, letting my eyes flutter at the thought of Clare.

"Sir, your friend is on the phone for you." the driver whispered and passed a phone back to me.

"Yes?" I asked into the speaker.

"I waited for you at the lockers, but your coach told me you left?" It was Olivia's dainty voice.

Olivia was a 'friend', I saw on a couple occasions. Ones in which our clothes were being taken off and such. She was not my girlfriend, but the press seemed to think so, I just never made any comment concerning that subject. I really didn't want a relationship, it was a distraction. I rolled my eyes at her call and place my hand on my forehead, rubbing it to calm the irritating sensation.

"I have somewhere to be right now. I have an important call to make when I get back home." I mumbled.

"Well, maybe I can come over later?" She asked, "I have a photo shoot next week in London, and need to spend as much time with you before I leave."

"Yeah, sure." I replied.

"Great babe, see you later. Kisses." She spoke in a high-pitched voice.

I hung up, awaiting to arrive back to my condo. It wasn't luxurious, but it was what I wanted, something satisfying and lenient.

I dialed my parents' number and was greeted by my mother, "Baby boy! Your father and I are so proud of you!"

"Thanks mom, dad watched the game?" I asked in disbelief. Bullfrog was more like the type of guy that would watch wrestling, rather than guys chasing a ball.

"He sure did, at one point he was asking Adam all these questions about the game. You should have seen his face, he was so clueless!" CeCe chuckled, I smiled talking to her.

"Just wanted to make sure if you guys are okay, I bought dad, that vintage Mustang he's wanted since I was a kid. It's getting shipped next week. I also know, you've wanted to remodel the kitchen for a very long time, so whenever you want to-"

"Eli, don't spoil us! You should save that money for when you get married and have kids. We saw on the news, that pretty girl, Olivia? She seems nice."

I rolled my eyes at the mention of Olivia. The fact that having a family one day was not in my mind never was since I was with Clare.

"She is. But, we're only friends." I said in a monotone voice.

"If you say so, Adam is here. Do you want to talk to him?"

"Pass me to him." I yelped.

"Eli! That pass was amazing, Messi was unbelievable-" Adam threw-up his words into the phone.

"Slow your roll, I call and I don't even get a hi?" I laughed.

"You're right." He gurgled and continued,"You became like a legend around town, everyone is so crazy about soccer now, thanks to you!" Adam emphasized.

"How's school, you and Fiona?" I continued.

"We're alright. She left to New York for a family reunion though. College at Kaplin U is pretty great. I'm majoring in biology." He continued.

"Who would've known machismo had a knack for science?" Sarcasm dripped in my voice.

"I guess you can say I'm a guy with many qualities. How about you Mr. Renaissance man, how's your English major going along?"

"I dropped that; it was a back-up plan if this soccer thing wouldn't work out. But seeing that it is...I'm alright. Guess Degrassi won't have someone majoring in literature, after all."

"Well, there is Cl-...uh I mean _cl_ever kids out there. _Sorry_." Adam stalled, clearly about to mention **_her_**.

"It's okay. Um, how is _she_? Do you know anything about her?" I hesitated to ask.

"Clare is, alright. Last time I saw her was at the market when she was in town, visiting her parents. She seemed okay."

"Is she..._seeing anyone_?" I squeaked.

"From what Alli tells Drew on the phone, she's focused on school only..._unlike _someone I know who's hooking up with hot Spanish models." I could basically hear Adam wiggle his eyebrows through the phone.

It was clear to Adam I had gotten over Clare. That I no longer loved her, thought of her, missed her.

He was beyond wrong.

I gulped. "She's a friend, people gossip too much." I only managed to say.

"_Alrighty then_...I'm really proud of you man, just keep working harder, and maybe you can visit your old pal in some time?" Adam slurred his words hopefully.

"Maybe you and my folks can visit me here for Christmas? You can bring Fiona; she likes Europe and stuff, right?" I deeply avoided at the fact of returning home, _seeing Clare_.

"That sounds like an offer I'm willing to consider, my famous bud." He chuckled.

"Good to know, I've got to go now. Take care." I ended the call.

I buried my face into my hands, trying my best to get _her_ out of my mind. It was all my fault I was feeling this way, that I missed her and felt the need to punch a hole in the wall. I ended the best thing in my life and I had to face the consequences. The stress from the relationship was a huge weight on my shoulders, _so why did I still feel like it was still there_.

With Olivia, things were strange. The last time I had a girlfriend besides Clare was with Julia. _Even then _I felt more comfortable in that relationship compared to whatever Olivia and I share together. Sure she was a very beautiful woman. Stunning in fact, the day I met her, all my attention and eyes set on her. And the first time we both had sex was amazing, but Clare's face and body was present in my mind the entire time, even to this day. Just wondering if Clare moved on is understandable, yet unbearable at the same time. I still felt guilty kissing and touching Olivia, as if I was cheating on Clare, and I guess that is why I haven't even referred to Olivia as my girlfriend.

Even though I still love Clare, I _never_ want to see her again. I don't plan on returning, only to have the chance of running into her and facing the fact that I couldn't have her in my arms and kiss her the way I used to.

Just give me time, and I'll forget about Clare. About the past. _Just wait and see_.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"I personally think it's a sign." Alli spoke while driving the both of us back to our homes for the weekend.

"For what?" I snapped.

"To move on."

_I could never do that._

I sighed heavily in response. "So you knew this whole time and didn't say a word?" I groaned.

"You told me you didn't want me to ever mention his name again. _I didn't_, besides I knew you would find out some time, I just expected it to be from someone who had no clue, letting me stick to my promise." She apologized.

"I felt like such an idiot, I was about to cry in front of a bunch of friends..." I paused. "So that's why you got all nervous when I told you I was going to watch the game!"

"Okay, you caught me, but really Clare if Eli moved on so should you. We all have our first loves, just wait and see until the right one comes along. You'll find him someday, I know you will."

I ignored her and focused at the scene displayed by the road. Then, I arrived at my old home, with my mother waiting for me outside the porch.

I stepped out of the car and rushed into a hug from her. I looked from the side of my eye and saw the Goldsworthys in their front lawn, Bullfrog working on a fancy new car, and CeCe sitting on a lawn chair watching him.

They looked at my direction and smiled politely. I waved back and duck my head, walking inside my house.

Home was never the same, knowing Eli was not in his bedroom listening to music or calling my name from across his window, to come over his house. It was as if he died and so did a part inside of me.

Even so, I never want to so him again. The same way I have trouble facing the fact that he has moved on, forgotten all about me and looked at another girl the same way he did to me once, touches her: igniting that electricity through her body, kissing her: sending her into a world caught between the clouds of the heaven I dreamed of. _I hate him_, with a pure jealousy and confusion. Wishing I never met him, that he never moved in next door, that he never **kicked that stupid soccer ball at my head**. That he dared to say he loved me once, when he made my childhood a living hell.

_What am I saying?_

I wished he would never return that way everything would be easier accepting the fact that he was a part of my past, _long gone_.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V. **

"_Tell me you love me, Eli_." Olivia kissed my neck as I clutched my hands on the bed sheets.

"I can't."

"You don't have to mean it." She whispered.

"That's not how it works." I answered, closing my eyes securely trying my best to ignore her stare.

She huffed and got out of bed, dressing into her clothes. "Well, I'm leaving now. I'll call you when I get there, okay?" She fake-smiled and walked over to me, giving me a kiss on the cheek.

After she left, I couldn't understand why I let her in my home, in my bed. She didn't deserve that spot, someone else did. I ignored the feeling, realizing I was content that I was doing something I enjoyed and got a profit out of it, but away from my parents and close friends were hard on me.

Nope.

I need to move on and forget about Clare. Maybe I should settle for a relationship with Olivia, go public with her, next week. **Soon**.

* * *

_And time flies by, wanted the most by but used by in the worst possible ways for both._

_

* * *

_

**A/N:**

ONE MORE CHAPTER LEFT and an epilogue! Oh my, how will it all end?

This chapter probably upset you more or pissed you off, either way I left a hint of how things are going to end in this chapter, maybe you guys can figure it out?

**_BTW, I do like happy endings. ;)_**

**REVIEW?**


	24. 22 Years Old: From Hate to Love

**The Final Chapter**

**A/N: **Well, everything has to **end** sometime. I am not too fond on how this turned out, but it has been said and done.

**To all of you precious and supportive reviewers out there**: I've been a Degrassi fan since the tender age of eight. Never in my years have I become so in love with a fictional couple. The moment Eli said "You have pretty eyes." I said 'Screw Klare! EClare FTW!' The connection I've seen between these two is beautiful and entertaining in an iridescent sense. That is why I came as a 'nobody' to this website and released the lingering creativity and obsession Eli and Clare had inspired within me. This was my first fan-fiction and the support you all gave is the best kind I have received in my writing. I go back on some chapters and realize 'Oh God? I wrote that?', but then I look at your reviews and it ALL becomes a motivation for me to improve. So all I can say is **thank you so dearly much **and I hope to write more in the future.

_You might hate my ending_. Oh and to _**'StarryEyes':**_ You clever person! You caught one of my hints :)

**Epilogue shall be posted SOON! :D **Maybe in a couple of days.

Okay, well here goes nothing:

**

* * *

**_3 years later:_

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"_So that's it_?" Michael answered and removed his hand from mine in order to have it run through his hair, his eyes seemed dull, his mouth sighed and closed.

"Yeah...I guess so." I replied and fixated my eyes on his face.

An indifferent silence followed.

"_So_, what now?" He questioned and turned back to look at me, waiting patiently for my response.

"I'd like to be friends, but we're almost graduating soon, so there's no point to that..._you're free_." I replied and placed a hand over his shoulder.

He chuckled softly. "Yeah, _I guess I am_...I should uh-probably leave you now." He stood up from my bed and walked to the door, accepting like a mature gentleman, our break-up.

Michael was always a concerned and nice guy towards me. But there was something always missing from the day he and I got involved in a relationship. _Sure_, he was a good kisser, his lips were soft and moist, his tongue knew where my weak spots were and that is the only way he could had ever initiated a feeling in me. His touch was strong and assuring, but it wasn't gentle and loving. He liked to drink beer and watch sports with friends on Friday nights. He enjoyed comedies and action movies, and he would always crinkle his nose whenever he saw an animal, he hated them. He liked eating vegetables, _who in their right mind enjoys that_?

But most importantly, he wasn't Eli.

He wasn't a guy with green eyes that made my heart skip a beat, and Michael never,** ever **smirked. He only grinned,_ and God_ did that grin make him look mischievous. He also wasn't a soccer player who was at the peak of his career, publicly dating a gorgeous woman.

The day magazines continuously published pictures of Eli and _she, who shall not be named,_ was a revelation for me to move on, give guys a chance. Michael was the first to ask me out for dinner during my state of vulnerability, and it has been a steady ride with him along the way. But where was the passion, the thrill, the love?

I took in a deep breath and fell on my bed, clutching a pillow to my chest. Closing my eyes at the action I just took and felt a huge relief that I ended it.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

"Mr. Goldsworthy, your friend is on the phone, he says it is urgent."

I looked at my personal assistant Alex, and scrunched my eyebrows, wondering the possibilities of what the phone call concerned.

"Hello?"

"Eli." Adam stated and sighed.

"What's going on? Is everything okay?"

My heart slowed down its pace at the answer, I focused into the call.

"It's CeCe; she got into a car accident last night." The nerves in my body paused and jolted once again at the realization,_ it was all real_."Bullfrog is too busy at the hospital to call, I had to tell you."

"I'm coming." I answered.

Even though it was June and matches were ahead in three weeks, nothing would be more important than my own mother.

"E-"

"I'll be there as soon as possible, call you when I get there." I interrupted him and ended the call.

I sighed and clenched my hands through my hair. _Please be okay, please_.

"Alex!" I hollered.

"Yes, sir?" He came back and waited for my order.

"I need you to tell the coach I'll be out of the country for two weeks, family issues. And I need the quickest ticket to Canada, now." I pointed fingers and waited for him to leave and take action.

"Of course." He jotted down the notes and exited the room, phoning my issues.

I had to come back no matter what this time. And nobody or nothing is going to stop me.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"I actually liked Michael." Alli sighed next to the racks of dresses at a boutique.

We were both dress shopping at the last minute for my graduation in two days, Alli had already graduated with a master's degree in engineering from Smithdale and I was waiting to be handed mine's in English Language/Literature from Toronto U.

"I _liked_ him too." I replied, obviously feeling apathetic towards the subject.

"At this rate, you'll end up single for the rest of your life." She scoffed.

_I couldn't care any less. Without Eli, romance was dead in my eyes._

"Well, how about you and Johnny? You two have been dating for a couple of months now, ever since Drew." I changed the subject.

"Drew was a nice boyfriend, but once a cheater always a cheater. Johnny is really something on the other hand."

Our hands swiped each hanger one by one. Grimacing at the ugly dresses and pausing to look at decent ones.

"How about this one?" I gestured to a white chiffon dress.

"Yuck! The convent called, they want their dress back." Alli chuckled and I gave her a small scowl.

"Here, this one will look good on you, besides it's your color." Alli showed a dark-magenta silk dress.

I looked at it and smiled. "Okay, I'll try it on."

Graduating was a scary step, with all these years in college that had matured me beyond than I could ever imagine. Time had changed everything, and it was all out of order.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

"Do you really have to go?" Olivia whined. She was standing by my bedside, as I packed clothes into my suitcase rapidly.

I paused and felt my veins pop out in my neck, irritated by her response. "_She's my mother_." I answered furiously.

"I know that, it's just that...you and I finally get some time away from our jobs to be together for once! And out of all times this just had to ha-"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence." I snarled.

"Eli, I disagree." She dared to say, striving to keep the tension out of her tone.

I closed my eyes, feeling her stare burning into me. I felt my breath whistling in my throat, ready to snap.

"I disagree too, and everything _with you_." I thundered.

"What do you mean?" She mouthed, pushing away a strand of hair that fell in her face.

I didn't have to think twice and felt a pure bliss in my heart and mind when I answered.

"I'm done. We're done."

She stood there looking at me, until her eyes traveled to the ground and folded her lips into her mouth, tapping her foot steadily. Her head rose up with anger across her face, like wildfire.

"I hope you are never happy, you heartless prick." She whimpered with rage.

"Get out of my house." I exclaimed softly in a cold, even tone.

Before she exited the room, her unjustified anger and distress took over and caused her to push the suitcase off of my bed and stepping all over my clothes, I neatly folded previously.

_Like Clare used to say, an eye for an eye, makes the world blind. Ignore her, Eli, she isn't worth it. **Never was**._

I walked down to the floor and stared at the mess she made, I felt relieved she was out of my life now. I picked up each piece of clothing and folded the sheets one more time. Then I searched for my passport and other belongings.

I had assistance getting my items into the car, and was driven to the airport.

After secretly avoiding the press and other people who could steal my time I waited in the gates until it was time to board the plane.

It was late in the afternoon and the hue of the sky was a soft azure. _Was it wrong that Clare was in my mind at a moment like this, when my mother was in injury?_

I couldn't bear the thought if CeCe was hurt in any way, the last time I saw her was a couple months ago in Christmas when she and Bullfrog came to visit. I still called her every now and then, but it wasn't the same as to being with her each day. With my father gone to work, she became lonely. I could only wonder why this had to happen to her, if there's anything I want in this moment is for her to be safe and sound.

I wondered how everybody was: the town, my home, Adam, _Clare_.

_I have no right to think about her_. Not after Adam broke me the news that she was finally seeing someone. Milo or Mitchell was his name. I couldn't believe that she moved on, that someone else would be able to look at her, be in the same room with her, _touch her_, **and kiss her**. I grew hot with anger and jealousy, and my growing hate for being away and without Clare became bigger than the number of emotions tied into me. My body tightened just at the thought that she could be at this moment with him, laughing, smiling.

_Did she feel this way?_

I wonder how she reacted to me dating Olivia. _If it hurt her_, I don't intend to be self-absorbed believing that her world revolved around me, but if she did truly love me with the intensity and devotion I did towards her, the thought kills me picturing her in pain.

_So why did I move on? _

Because the thought of letting her go became too unbearable to handle, something I wanted to get rid of, hide away from both the pain and loss, thus searching for a cure. _Any._

However, no cure to my love for her **had or will **exist.

* * *

When I stepped out of the airplane and into the airport, the air was different. The sense was contrast. Everything was what I missed, **_needed_**.

I pulled on a large hoodie and wore dark sunglasses, trying my best to go by unnoticed by all of those.

"Eli?" I heard a longed voice.

I turned around seeing a slender man, he had grown over time. His hair was shorter now, but he still had that friendly look in his eye.

I pulled my shades away and stared at him briefly, before a smirk crept up my face. "Adam." I sighed in relief and walked over to give him a warm hug.

"Has it really been that long?" He questioned and raised his hands down.

"Five years. _I know_." I smiled and frowned once I realized why I was back. "Tell me she's okay." I shakily breathed.

"She's better than okay, she's alive. She just got a broken arm and a couple of stitches." Adam answered and stepped up closer to me, placing an arm on my shoulder. "Knowing that you are back might be the best medicine she could get at the moment."

"Thank goodness." I paused.

"You should 'disguise' yourself better. Those chicken legs of yours are not hard to miss." Adam tried to lighten the mood.

I laughed lightly at this. "I missed you man. A lot."

"Let's just get your stuff and drop them home. Then we could go the hospital, on one condition though." He kept a serious look.

"What?" I nodded.

"You have to tell me everything, when you were gone."

"Only if you do the same for me." I smiled.

* * *

_Two Days Later_

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"...In conclusion fellow graduates, I wish the best of all to you. And bidding you all the best, I am proud to have all of you in my life in a somewhat significant way, thus it has been a pleasure to address you today. Thank you." Mason Haque ended his speech.

We all rose to the stands and walked one by one, receiving our diplomas.

When I reached the stage I looked around the crowd and found Alli and my parents, including Darcy who was holding her adopted son, Peter.

I smiled at them and they waved back. Flashes of cameras were being snapped and I shook the dean's hand, walking down the stage with my **_future_** in my hands.

The ceremony ended when everyone threw their caps in the air, I tossed mine but failed miserably when it didn't reach that high.

"Clare!" Alli squealed, I ran to her and gave her a long hug.

"Congratulations, baby sis." Darcy grinned and gave me a kiss on the cheek.

Peter, who was a four year-old orphan from Kenya, stared at me. "Whee! Aunt Cler!" He yelled, my parents and others giggled at his response.

I looked over at my parents who both had tears in their eyes, even though they had divorced, the fact that they got together for one day for me meant the world.

"You guys..." I croaked and felt myself sad to see them in that emotional state. "Come on, I'm the one who graduated _and_ I'm not crying."

"We're really proud of you. All your mother and I ever wanted is for you girls to be happy." My father sighed. "Now that Darcy is and **_you are_**, is more than what we could ask for. Your lives are complete." He smirked, out of all times.

I nodded awkwardly to his response. "Come here." He gestured and pulled me in for a hug.

_Happy? Me? Life complete?_

This was all an act. I was dying on the inside today. I felt an empty tunnel descending inside of me with the accompany of a damned grief, which had all formed into a stiff ball located in the pit of my stomach, and those feelings felt like bursting at this moment.

"Oh Clare! You wore _tha__t_ to your graduation? It doesn't even match with your dress." My mother pointed at the necklace in my neck.

I hadn't even noticed, the silver chained necklace with a glistening heart engraved with a cross on my neck; the one Eli had given me.

_Has it really been there all this time?_

Alli's eyes bulged out and gave me a knowing look.

"I didn't even notice." I mouthed.

"Well, we are having a small dinner at the house later, you can change out of it there." My mother sighed.

My father put his hand around my shoulder and we walked to the car, waiting to arrive home.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

"Baby boy, I'm fine. Go home, get some rest." CeCe insisted from her hospital bed.

"No way am I leaving you alone, I'm already staying at a hotel, besides."

"Now why on Earth would you do that?"

_Because Clare's family lives next door._

"It's closer to the hospital."

"I'm going to take a nap. You should go, your father is coming back from the house; he just grabbed a couple of clothes." My mother ordered.

"Alright, but I'll be back sometime." I smiled and bent down to kiss her on the head.

I pulled over a huge gray sweatshirt and a beanie, as well as some sunglasses, ready to exit the hospital and go by unnoticed. The press didn't have any idea what was going on with me or that I left the country, since I kept it confidential.

When I arrived back to the hotel, I took a hot shower, letting the water relax the tension in my muscles.

_And Clare came to mind_. I've been in this town for three days and every single spot was easy to recognize with all the moments I had shared with her. A drive by to the park brought back the mixed emotions from my soccer matches there and when Clare and I used to kiss and talk. The Dot was now more modern, but the table in the secluded corner, from what Adam had told me still had the carvings of Clare's and my initials. When I passed by Degrassi, and saw new kids swarming out into the streets: I remembered the times after school when I drove her home.

Now that I was back in the midst of my memories, my feelings became more unbearable to handle. I frustrated at this thought and sensation. _I needed closure_, and since I was back in town it would probably be easier to confront it. I got out of the shower and dressed into unrecognizable clothes, and was bored out of my mind. Adam was at Fiona's graduation all the way on the other side of town, so it was understandable he needed to leave.

I looked in my suitcase and found a spare soccer ball I brought with me. I needed to clear my head.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"A toast to our beautiful daughter." My mother echoed. My aunts, cousins, and Alli with her date raised their glasses.

I grimaced at the attention.

I walked away towards my room, after everyone went back to their affairs.

When I entered the room I saw Darcy putting Peter to sleep on my bed. "Sorry, but he liked your bed the most." She smiled.

"It's okay" I muttered and walked over to the window, watching Eli's abandoned, lifeless room. My fingers delicately traced my curtains attempting to block the view.

"_You know_, I remember when you used to do that every day when I would be gone at cheer practice. You think I didn't notice, but I did. I would even sometimes hide behind my door and watch you do pathetic love sighs at him." Darcy petted Peter's head, before walking to me.

I stayed quiet, whimpering inside my throat and never tearing my eyes away from his room.

"What's wrong? You graduated at the top five of your class. Mom and dad are downstairs, getting along for once. I came here with my son to see you smiling and happy today, but you're not."

I shrugged.

Darcy followed my gaze once again.

"You still love him **don't you**?" She softly spoke looking at the same direction I was.

I choked on a formed sob. "You're the first to understand that." I muttered.

"What about Alli?" She asked.

"Alli wants me to move on. She thinks I'll find my '_true love' _somewhere else." I sniffled.

She let out a soft breath and placed her arm on my back, rubbing it to ease the nerves."It's never easy...but if what the news says is true, that he is dating some other girl. You need closure, and move on your own. Time is the only thing to worry about."

I sighed, realizing that what Darcy was telling me was true.

"I _need_ to get out of here, everyone keeps on thinking I'm so happy, and it's disgusting." I rubbed my eyes gently, trying not to smudge my make-up.

"Go where you need to go and think. I'll cover for you." Darcy hugged me.

I stared at her in gratitude.

"Well, go on!" She shooed. "Go blow this popsicle stand, but if I were you, I'd sneak through the back door and go around. _Here_." She chuckled, dangling her car keys.

I took them from her hand "Thank you so much." I replied.

Before I exited the door, I looked at her, "Darcy? Are you happy?"

She walked back to the bedside and gave a kiss to Peter's dark soft skin, "You bet."

I nodded at her, leaving to take small steps down stairs. I then saw Alli speaking with her boyfriend, my dad drinking wine with my uncles, and my mother gossiping with my aunts. My little cousins were in the kitchen devouring the appetizers. Everyone seemed so happy, and right into their place.

**_I wanted that_**, and before I could think of anything else I went without being seen out of the door.

I looked back down to the necklace Eli gave me and clutched it, knowing I did indeed need closure, and _I knew where to go_.

* * *

_"It's a lot more beautiful inside, don't worry." He smiled and grabbed my hand._

_He opened the gate and led me in. Eli had installed some lights the night before, and the place was glowing._

_"Eli…is this place a church? It's so beautiful!" I gasped in awe._

_"It's abandoned. You know I'm not religious or anything, but this place reminded me of you." He smiled._

I took in a deep breath and parked the car in the back. I got out and steadily walked to this missed place. My dress was clinging softly to my sides and I shivered at the gentle warmness of the sun shining upon my skin.

As I reached the gate, I noticed it was slightly open. I ignored it and walked inside.

Stars weren't shining like the last time I was here. The night had not even arrived, but it was the afternoon and the leaves were a forest green, the same color Eli's eyes were. Holes in the trees and bushes oozed a heavenly aura of sunlight, and I walked to the church.

My heart stopped when I saw the same hammock we had both used the last time we made love. I walked up slowly to it, feeling a lump in my throat form and my eyes glistening with sadness and a sudden craving at the memory. I walked to it and felt the cloth. It was a dark yellow, not the bright lemony one it used to be. Dirt had stained to parts of it, and the soft texture it once held became tattered and antique.

I looked around, knowing that he was my only happiness. From the day I met him.

* * *

**Elis' P.O.V.**

I stood in the secluded part away from the area. I breathed in the atmosphere Clare and I once shared. It was a bright sunny day and the sky was bluer than ever. I sat down to the ground and started kicking random rocks and twigs.

"I guess I have to get over you." I muttered, thinking of Clare.

It had been so long, I was beginning to forget the look of her face, the one of a kind attributes she attained.

She was the most beautiful girl, I know that for sure. Yet, I had forgotten the feeling my body and mind grew whenever I saw her.

I became bored and began to kick my soccer ball, taking anger out on it.

"It's all you fault." I stepped on it furiously.

Squishing it with the both of my legs and wanting to pop the living air inside of it. "_Look at me_, I'm talking to an inanimate object." I say to myself.

I looks at the ball with a silly glare, "First you separate me from the girl I love, then you make me crazy." I mouthed.

I groaned in displeasure and gave it a hard kick into the direction far ahead.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"This is goodbye." I sighed.

I loved Eli, but it was time for me to move on, **permanently**.

I nervously fidgeted with the hem of my dress, and shook my head. Then, I grabbed the black stoned ring from my pocket. _I have to do this_.

Once my hands touched the chain of the necklace and unlocked it away from my neck, I was ready to place it down in the hammock and leave, saying goodbye to my love for good.

_When all of a sudden_, something hit me in the head, hard. My body twitched at the feeling, and my head went numb. Nerves were jolted and relaxed, evolving into a screeching pain echoing inside of me.

"_Ow_." I winced and rubbed it softly. My curls were out of place, but that didn't matter. What mattered was _where did it come from? What was it?_ I searched on the ground and saw the object rolling tauntingly in front of me. Bouncing in the slowest movement I had ever seen in my life. A soccer ball.

I grabbed it. Holding it with both of my hands, _this was all too familiar_.

I was expecting to see a little boy, perhaps he was playing with it. I looked up and felt someone jogging, the sounds becoming closer and closer.

I clutched the ball to my chest and after held it in one hand, ready to give it to whoever threw it.

"_Oh, Man! Geez, I didn't see you there!"_ **Someone** exclaimed.

My body had shut down. My face went blank, with my mouth slightly open, I could feel the color draining from my face as I stared with wide-eyes into the ball. I forgot how to breathe.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

When I kicked the ball, I heard something wince. _I hit someone_. I turned regretful at the action taken.

_Who was here anyway?_

It didn't matter because I jogged to see who I could have hurt.

I saw a figure bending down to pick up my ball.

"_Oh, Man! Geez, I didn't see you there!" _I apologized.

The person stayed there in a stiff movement and turned around slowly to look at me.

The hair in my body stood up. I let out a sudden sigh, ready to open my mouth to speak, but I couldn't, so I snapped it shut. I felt light-headed, shocked. My mind began buzzing.

I looked at her.

She was more gorgeous than ever.

I could only hear my heart beat, pounding with an intensity and passion ready to tick in any moment. Her blue eyes were stained like a clear glossy pool, _she had been crying_. They were like jewels in this instant, captivating were the least to describe them. Her ruffled curls were out of place in certain areas, but they were still soft and angelic, as if they were meant to be beautiful in any way possible. Her mouth was two folds of ruby tainted skin, which looked so plump and soft framing that porcelain skin clearer than a cloud's reflection. She was no longer a teenage girl, _she was a woman_. The dark-magenta dressed hugged and complimented her body like a perfect hourglass. _I now remember her face, her touch, and her kisses_.

_I knew at this moment, she was my future. I don't want to be anywhere else but with her._

Her button nose was flushed by a soft red hue, and she breathed shakily, looking at me. Her body was stiff like a wall, with her hands holding my ball.

Tears begin falling from her face.

_Don't cry darling_.

"W-what are you d-doing here?" She speaks.

_She speaks_! Her voice: it's raspy at this moment but her vocal chords emphasize a rich and smooth tone.

I took a step closer to her, we meet eye to eye. I remove my sunglasses and my hoodie. Even under all of this, she knew it was me.

Our eyes look at each other. The tears welling in her eyes were clear enough for me took look into my own.

I reach my hand upwards, to touch her face. She swats it away and cringes.

* * *

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"_Don't touch me_." I answer. I felt the poison in my voice and regretted all at once.

"Clare." He states, he grabs my chin and makes me look at him.

He says my name and I feel oblivious to everything around me. His green eyes are a stab in the heart. I've seen how he looks in magazines, newspapers, but it was never up to the level of the real thing.

"Yes." I answer, waiting for him to tell me what he wants and_ leave_. To go back to his girlfriend, and new life.

"We need to talk." He says in a croaky voice, and looks at my hand.

He looks at the necklace I am holding, the ring. _Everything_.

"What is _this_ about?" He asks and touches them.

"_Why are you here_." I ignore his question.

"CeCe got into a car accident." I gape at his answer, "She's fine now, but right now that is not on my mind...Clare why do you have these, _here_?" He asks again, his fingers reaching to touch the objects wrapped upon my palm.

"**Closure**." I only speak, and he gives a look of similarity between ourselves.

He shakes his head, and removes the soccer ball out of my hands. He tosses it to another side.

"Why?" He asks in a hurt voice. I could see the rim of his eyes longing to cry.

I give a cold laugh. "_Why_? Because, I need to move on, you're in my past. You were out of my life from the day you decided to end it with me. So...please, go back to your new life and forget about my existence and I will do the same."

_What are you doing, Clare?_

He stays quiet. Raises his head to look at me. "**Fine, Clare**. Look me in the eyes and tell me, you never want to see me again, and I'm gone. I only want you to be happy, after all I've done." He whispers.

I don't even think about my answer and speak from the hatred inside of me boiling with an immense stupidity. "I never want to see you again." I cry, and point him to leave. "Take these." I hand him the necklace and the ring.

The pause following this was an eternity, and I could hear his itchy breath beneath the sound of tears dropping to the ground. I look away, wanting to ignore his face. But I could feel an emotionless glare cascading out of his face and into my silhouette.

He gulps at my answer and nods. "_Goodbye_." He utters. He begins to walk away, at a snail's pace.

I turn around, contemplating my decision.

_They say everything happens for a reason_.

I realized I wasn't beautiful as a child, but Eli saw behind all of that and still loved me at a certain point. So perhaps it was all a test that God send upon to show that his feelings were true and pure. Eli moving in next door wasn't a coincidence; it was destiny for us to meet. Going to Kenya wasn't just because I felt like it; it was because I needed a break from the chaotic world surrounding me. Losing my virginity to him was because I loved-_**love **_him. Eli playing soccer is what brought us together multiple of times, like right now.

I believe in the higher power among humanity, and I believe in destiny. **Something **pulled me in to coming here, at this precise spot, today. I can't put it into words, but living it was more important than the actual explanation. I could have stayed at the party and mope the entire night, not even seeing Eli once again. I could have made two steps forward or back from where I was standing and not get hit by that soccer ball. I could have come at a different time, and none of this would _ever_ happen.

_But it did_, and it had to be for something, _for someone_. **For Eli and I**.

_So, if none of those things ever happened, and I never took the risks that came along with them. Where would I be right now?_

**Realize** _Clare_.

I do not know the answer, I never will. But I know that I can never face the chance of sitting alone for the rest of my life wondering if-

"_**Eli**_!" I yelled and ran to him at the gate.

He looked back at me, his eyes blood-shot. And his mouth pursed into a flat line.

I stop to look at him. "You're right." I catch my breath. "**_We should talk_**." I say.

I feel tears running down my cheeks, and he looks at me briefly and gives me the most powerful hug, history could seize.

I missed his touch, and electricity initiates throughout my body, feeling his scent hovering me in complete bliss.

"I'm never leaving." He cries.

I don't respond and lay in his arms. **Forever**.

* * *

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I stare into her eyes, kiss her bruised head and hold her there.

The burden, pain, longing, emotionless hell is **over**. She was my cure.

She was what I dared to hate at a moment of uncertainty. The minute my eyes looked at hers when we were seven years-old and churned at the sight is irrational to me at this moment. She was what annoyed all senses out of me for years, and now I wanted her by me in every second given to the both us.

Now, she is what I adore and need more than anyone or anything in this universe.

It may be never or someday for me to understand how we humans can have a certain emotion **_evolve_** into another. How time can change it all.

_What is it that triggered these horrid feelings inside of me in the first place towards her?_ Like they say:

'From hate to love.'

* * *

**Eli and Clare's P.O.V.**

I love you.

* * *

**A/N:**

Love? Hate?: **REVIEW!** Please :)

_Reason why I ended it there?_: All the problems are gone, the new chapter in their lives begins once they walk out of that gate.

THE **REAL **ENDING SHALL BE IN THE EPILOGUE THOUGH!

**Final Word. -No I will not make a sequel- Final Word.**

**THANK YOU TO ALL, IT HAS BEEN MY PLEASURE. :)**


	25. Epilogue

"_And they lived happily ever after_."

A beautiful giggle escaped Grace's mouth.

"Mommy? Do fairytales come true?" Grace wiggled out of her mother's caressing arms and quirked an eyebrow at her.

Clare sighed softly and gave a loving smile at her six year-old daughter's face. At this instant, Clare removed the glasses from Grace's eyes and placed them on her nightstand. Only to take in a deep breath at the view her daughter's emerald eyes gave. She was a very small girl with an angelic face, her reddish hair curled at the bottom forming a swift look, the same one her father held. Her pink lips smacked and popped, impatiently waiting for her mother's answer.

"_Well_..." Clare paused and gave her a kiss on the fore-head. "No." Grace's face fell.

Clare frowned and attempted to make things better, "But..._dreams, they do come true_." Clare tickled her tummy.

Grace gave a stiff grin and batted her eyelashes, "Did your dream come true mommy?" Grace asked with a wondrous emotion, she scratched her head and snuggled back in her mother's arm.

"Oh, yes." Clare exclaimed softly, and combed her hands through the locks of Grace's hair delicately, "What's your dream sweetie?" Clare glanced down at her briefly.

"I want Sammy to love me." Grace sighed. Clare chuckled at this.

"Sammy is still young for that, honey."

"I _love_ him, mommy." Grace protested, she wasn't a shy girl and inherited the same fiery confidence her father always had.

"Since when do you like boys anyway, huh?"

"I...I um don't 'member." Grace blinked her eyes.

"Don't worry, one day you'll find a nice boy who will love you. And take care of you." Clare mumbled. "Then when you do, daddy and I will meet him _and_..." Clare heard soft snores and looked down at her daughter, who curled up into position falling asleep with half-lidded eyes.

Clare sighed and cautiously got up, pulled the covers upon her and adjusted her pillow. She bent down to rub her head and gave her a goodnight kiss.

She walked away, and looked at her one more time before reaching the side of the room to plug in her daughter's favorite night light and headed towards the door to turn off the light switch, leaving the door a bit open, just in case.

Clare left her alone and walked a couple doors down to her bedroom.

She undressed into her silky nightgown and walked to the bathroom, to brush her teeth. She was too busy rinsing her face, when all of a sudden two strong hands snaked up her waist.

"_Eli_." She gasped.

"Did you put Grace to bed already?" He whispered; his white cloth shirt and grey pajama pants made an abrupt contact with her skin.

"_After_ her fourth bedtime story, she finally went to sleep." Clare smiled; Eli turned off the faucet behind her and focused all his attention towards her.

He ran his hands through the silky cloth and traced patterns across her body. She lifted her head and eyed him seductively, walking out of the bathroom and into the room, struggling to make their way towards the bed.

All was forgotten in that instant. They were in each other's mind for now; it was selfish yet so right. Everything was meant to be between the two, the sparks that flew at each tender touch, gave a beautiful contraction to their muscles. Their hearts fluttered at their sultry gazes and their voices sent a beautiful hymn of pure bliss and righteousness.

His mouth sucked on her neck tracing down to her collar bone and to her creamy shoulders. "You're so beautiful. I don't deserve you." He mumbled.

She pulled his face away and raised it look into her eyes, cupping his cheeks. "Don't say stupid things." She looked up at him and back to his lips. He rolled on top of her, removed his shirt, as she ran her hands frantically searching throughout his toned body.

"Did _you_ check on Grace?" Clare gasped out of sudden breath as his lips continued to kiss her jaw line.

"Of course, I gave her a goodnight kiss." He muttered rapidly.

"You still wear that?" Clare lifted his hand away from her and gazed at the purity ring on his pinky finger.

"You still wear mine." Eli muttered, "Besides, it's something I love to look at every day."

Clare pecked his lips and then looked down at his pants, reaching to pull them off. He was left in his boxers only by this moment.

He sat up abruptly, and after all these years still asked for permission. "May I?" He tugged on her nightgown.

She nodded and he gently pulled away the straps, overjoyed to the fact that Clare slept without a bra.

"Clare?" Eli croaked.

"Hmm?" She moaned.

"I want you to give me another child." Eli whispered.

She pulled away and stared into his eyes briefly, before letting out an ecstatic sigh, "Really?"

"I want an _Eli Jr._ running around the backyard, we can get him a tree house in the back, and I can teach him soccer. Grace will have someone to play with, and most importantly...you'll be the one I will share him with." Eli rambled.

"Okay." She smiled and cupped his face, pulling it towards her direction. Hungrily kissing him with a passion, bursting fireworks within the two.

He placed one hand on top of her left breast, feeling the soothing beats of her heart-_lub dub_-, the sound echoed. While his other free hand slid beneath her. His boxers and her panties were discarded, and the love making began.

After, he wrapped his arms around her waist and whispered. "I love you."

She mouthed back the same and caressed his face, "I'm really happy." She giggled.

Eli looked at Clare, _really looked_ at her and noticed every intricate detail upon her face. He caressed it lovingly and dazed into distraction. He doesn't know what would be of him if Clare never spoke to him that day.

When he took her to the park, they walked around, explaining what had happen to them the years they were separate. Him discussing and regretting the fact that he had broken it off with her. Her, emphasizing the pain she dealt with and the struggle she faced to avoid the heartbreak, leading her to move on. He mentioned the subject of Olivia and denied to have ever care for her in the smallest fraction he had for Clare. By the end of the talk, he took her home in Darcy's car and walked inside her house hand in hand with the most beautiful girl in the world. The look on everybody's face was priceless, for one fact that Eli had returned, and for another that _Elijah Goldsworthy_, number freakin' 23 was in the Edwards's living room, an _ex_-renowned athlete.

He refused to leave her side and discontinued playing soccer; she denied to let him give up his dream at first. However, Clare was what he needed in his life; she became a vital part of him and would have given the world just to spend a day with her.

So, goodbye to Barcelona was what Eli said the minute he discontinued his contract.

With brief patience and approval of Randall Edwards and Helen overtime, he proposed to Clare three months later. One year later, Grace was born.

It was a marvelous thing Eli had gone to college for a couple of years and maintained excellent grades for him to pursue his back-up career in literature.

He certainly is remembered sometimes as a soccer player, but that didn't matter the least bit to him anymore. **_He is happy_**.

"I don't work this Saturday, maybe we can take Grace to the park for a picnic with Alli and Johnny's son?" Clare rubbed against his bare chest and lifted her eyes, waiting for his decision.

"Of course." He kissed her forehead. "But, I don't think he likes her. Sammy threw dirt at her last time." Eli laughed.

"At least he doesn't call her 'cootie queen'." Clare retorted.

"You're my queen, baby."

Clare slapped his chest playfully and he reached in for a quick kiss.

"Give the kid a break, he's still young." Eli defended.

"Like I gave you one?"

"See how well that turned out?" Eli grinned and wrapped his arms around her bare waist tighter and tighter.

Eight years later and Eli still wonders what it was that made him ever hate Clare. But, that didn't matter at all anymore or to Clare, because...

They have the rest of their lives to figure it out, together.

* * *

**A/N: **

Thank you for reading! :3

The reviews were fantastic! I almost cried of pure joy :D

* * *

**P.S.** I have written a new story it's called **"Puberty."**

I will post it on later on. It's going to be strictly in character, WAY different than this story. It'll be a short story, a collection of one shots, if you may say so. So check it out if you like?

It is Clare centered, Eli will be mentioned in it though, but only until the end of it. So if you like Clare as a person alone, like me, then you'll like it, it will have mentions of KLARE, ClarexAlli friendship, and almost EVERY guy Clare has been involved with.

**Full Summary**: Puberty is much more complicated than what Clare Edwards had expected. As a teenage girl, she has struggled to recognize who she truly is. With the help of certain boys, she shall learn every emotional part of growing up.


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